To the Anxious Parent

Do you ever feel anxious as a parent? I do. I’ll be the first to raise my hand. I’ll raise both hands!

All kinds of things contribute to this anxiety. Our culture encourages us to work ourselves to death and work our children to death so we can be successful. But this drive to succeed and consume more and more stuff can make us spiritually sick inside. Some have called it “affluenza”.

We’re so focused on earning money and spending money, meeting deadlines and reaching goals, that we drive ourselves crazy.

Anxious Toil

God has a word for us anxious parents. Psalm 127:3 says, “It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.”

Have you ever wondered why God made us in such a way that we have to sleep away a third of our lives? Isn’t that crazy? Think of how many hours we could be doing other things. Why did he make us that way? Why do we need sleep? Sleep is a gift from God. It reminds us that we are not God. God wants us to rest in him.

Rest in God

We are dependent little children. Isn’t that humbling? Our most important identity as parents is that we are children. We are children first and parents second. Let that sink in.

You are the Father's beloved child. And he is your gracious parent. He loves you, and because he loves you, he has given you the gift of sleep. He has given you rest. We need rest as parents, don’t we?

A couple weeks ago, my oldest daughter was having trouble sleeping. She was hot and needed to change into something cooler. Then she needed a drink of water. Then she needed to go to the bathroom. Then she needed me to tuck her in—again! I wanted to sit down and talk with my wife. I was done parenting for the day! But she kept whining and saying, “My blanket doesn’t feel right, and there’s birds chirping outside.” I finally yelled up at her, “It’s not going to be perfect until heaven! Get to sleep for crying out loud!” I reacted in anger because I wanted to rest. I deserved that, right?!

God knows what we need. He knows that we need sleep and rest to remind us that in the day-to-day struggles of parenting. He’s God, and we’re not. And he’s at work even as we sleep to parent us as we parent our kids. So, in times of anger, in times of anxiety, he’s helping us to depend on him as broken and beloved children.

Depend on God

We are dependent children. That’s our identity. Seems humbling, I know. But we’re just following after Jesus. Paul Miller, in his book, A Praying Life, says, “Jesus is without question the most dependent human being who ever lived” (p. 45).

We know that because he said things like, “I can do nothing on my own” (John 5:30). He depended on his Father and the Holy Spirit for everything. And he prayed, and he prayed, and he prayed - even going away to desolate places to be alone with his Father in prayer.

As parents, Jesus calls us to follow his example and pray and come to him for rest. I love his invitation in Matthew 11:28: “Come to Me, all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

Remember the Son

Jesus offers a different kind of rest. Rest in the finished work of Christ on our behalf. On the cross, Jesus, the perfect King, took our unrighteousness and gave us his perfect righteousness so that by faith we are his beloved children (2 Cor. 5:21).

That truth changes how we parent. When Christian parents build their lives on who they are in Christ – it changes everything. Instead of “eating the bread of anxious toil,” we can rest.

• We rest because we are declared to be right with God on the basis of Christ’s righteousness, not ours
• We rest because he has called us his holy and beloved children
• We rest because we are forgiven and he has covered our many failures and will remember our sins no more
• And we rest because He has accepted us and looks on us as perfect parents because of our bond with His perfect Son

Feel that. Rest in that. Stop eating the bread of anxious toil. You’re a child first and a parent second. Depend on him, meditate on Christ's work, and find real rest.

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Doug Wolter served for eight years as family pastor at LaGrange Baptist Church in Kentucky. He is now senior pastor at Oak Hill Baptist Church in Humboldt, Iowa. He has an amazing wife and three incredible kids who continue to humble him and fill him with joy.  He enjoys drinking coffee, reading, exercising, and blogging at life2getherblog.com.

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For more resources on gospel-centered family life, check out Winfield Bevin's A Beginner's Guide to Family Worship.

For more free articles on parenting, read: A Child's Gospel by Ben Connelly, Finding Christ in the Family Room by Luma Simms, and Becoming a Parent and Discipling Children by Jonathan Dodson.

Everyone Proselytizes

While we were in Manhattan, we saw two people proselytizing (proclaiming the gospel of Jesus Christ) using a megaphone in Union Square and another in the subway. They were both preaching the warnings of sin and the impending judgment. It was disappointing that Christ Himself appeared to be less exalted than the sins of man. At Union Square people were watching, listening, ignoring, but all looked completely uninterested. In the subway, people just walked on by as if it wasn’t happening. This is the typical image people have of evangelism, proselytizing the coming judgment of God on people for their sins and it’s typical because most street preachers focus on this. For most people who don’t believe in Jesus Christ as Lord, this seems ludicrous and most would rather he be silent and simply live out his faith, but I believe the reality is that everyone proselytizes about something, some cause, some event, some show, something.

Amber found this quote from C.S. Lewis that I think outlines perfectly what I’m trying to say:

But the most obvious fact about praise – whether of God or any thing – strangely escaped me. I thought of it in terms of compliment, approval, or the giving of honor. I had never noticed that all enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise unless (sometimes even if) shyness or the fear of boring others is deliberately brought in to check it. The world rings with praise-lovers praising their mistresses, readers their favorite poet, walkers praising the countryside, players praising their favorite game-praise of weather, wines, dishes, actors, motors, horses, colleges, countries, historical personages, children, flowers, mountains, rare stamps, rare beetles, even sometimes politicians or scholars. I had not noticed how the humblest, and at the same time most balanced and capacious, minds, praised most, while the cranks, misfits and malcontents praised least . . .

I had not noticed either that just as men spontaneously praise what ever they value, so they spontaneously urge us to join them in praising it: “Isn’t she lovely? Wasn’t it glorious? Don’t you think that magnificent?” The Psalmists in telling everyone to praise God are doing what all men do when they speak of what they care about. My whole, more general, difficulty about the praise of God depended on my absurdly denying to us, as regards the supremely Valuable, what we delight to do, what indeed we can’t help doing, about everything else we value.

I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation. It is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete till it is expressed.

-C.S. Lewis

I’ve never met anyone that doesn’t proselytize, I think the question is now whether the thing you praise is truly worthy of infinite value? If you’re a Christian, you are proclaiming that Jesus Christ is the ultimate value of your life. Is that reflected in what you praise?

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Cross-posted from Gentrified.

Don't Waste Your College: An Essay on Adolescence

The American college experience occupies a vaunted place in the mind of many an adolescent.  College, overworked high schoolers assure themselves, will be a place of freedom, experimentation, video games, and goofing off.  And that’s just in class.

The system of delayed adulthood or prolonged adolescence or unmitigated disaster (choose whatever term suits your fancy) is by now a part of American culture.  It starts young.  Parents baby their children, allowing them to live luxe lives at home, chores and work and duress a thing of the bygone past.  They give them all kinds of gadgets and diversions to stave off their ever-shortening attention spans.  Kids are expected to be immature and silly.  This is true even in churches.  We don’t train them to sit through a worship service–perish the thought!–but rather entertain them during the most serious and needed hour in the week.  As a parent, you tolerate all sorts of backtalk and laziness and worldliness, which leads into high school, where it is assumed (stupidly) that children should hate their parents, work even harder than before to avoid responsibility, and learn from their equally immature and uninformed peers.  All this leads to the beulah land of college, where whatever surly bonds of constraint remain are slipped off in pursuit of hedonistic excess and childlike gratification.  As Diana West and others have essentially said, we are training our children to be, well, children.

All of which makes me grateful for Alex Chediak’s superlative Thriving at College: Make Great Friends, Keep Your Faith, and Get Ready for the Real World! (Tyndale, 2011).  Chediak is an Associate Professor of Engineering and Physics at California Baptist University, a school that in my experience turns out some great students.  He has written about courtship, and he has a great blog that you should check out.  Thriving at College is written to counter precisely the kind of culture I’ve just ranted about.  In my humble estimation, it succeeds on all counts.

There honestly is too much to cover here.  I told Alex in an email after receiving this book that if I had my druthers, I would buy 1,000 copies of this book and give them out to every college student or will-be college student I know.  That’s not endorsement bluster; I mean those words.  Alex emphasizes Christ-centered responsibility, hard work, and planning throughout.  He gives excellent spiritual advice for young students who have been trained in Christian homes and may meet with ideas counter to their faith.  He sets forth in compelling, compassionate prose the need for young men and women to pursue marriage, though not as an end in itself.

Here’s an excerpt on time management that shows Alex’s blend of wise biblical counsel and personal care:

For starters, your parents shouldn’t remind you when to study, sleep, wake up, read your Bible, exercise, or eat.  You’d be insulted if they did!  They can encourage you in these areas if necessary, but the actual implementation and balance is something young adults must own from day one of college.  Remember, whatever you don’t rule will rule you.  This is equally true for those still living at home, though in that case adult children need to be respectful of any household rules their parents deem appropriate (such as a curfew or a requirement to eat dinner with the family on occasion).  Parents’ house, parents’ rules. (124)

This is the kind of sane, wise advice that populates Thriving at College.  There’s loads of it in the book.  To help students avoid the vagaries of delayed adulthood–a state I’m proud to note that many of my Boyce College students are skipping–buy them this book and work through it with them.  That’s the funny thing about the text–in the end, it’s not really just about college.  It’s about a life of Christocentric virtue accomplished through attention to biblical wisdom.  Taking dominion for the glory of the Savior who took dominion of our lives–this, and not more wasted time and wimpy expectations, is what our youth need.

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Cross-posted from Owen's personal blog.

Encouraging Leadership

When it comes to leadership, I can be intimidating. At least, that's what people tell me. My engine runs at high RPMs, and I tend to be on the type A side of the personality spectrum. I approach most issues in a black-and-white fashion and pursue excellence. Most leaders exhibit similar characteristics. That's why we're drawn to leadership. People want to follow because you are confident, strong, and know what you want and how to get it. But these characteristics can ruin your people (and you) if you're not careful.

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body. - Prov. 16:24

Leaders can give you a list of ways you can improve. They know the areas that need adjustment, correction, or improvement. This is a necessary ability in leading anything well. They will not long tolerate the status quo, or the organization becomes stagnant, and we all know what happens to water when it remains stagnant. It starts to stink.

However, if this is true, how can we lead well without constantly harping on our people? Herein lies the power of encouragement.

The concept of withdrawals and deposits has been helpful for me when it comes to excellence in leadership. You will inevitably have tough conversations with those under your direction - you know, those conversations that start, "Hey Mike, can we chat about something?" You both know that you are about to take a relational withdrawal from him in the form of a suggestion for how Mike needs to grow, change, repent, or whatever. But, following the bank analogy, is there money in the bank from which to draw? Or is your relational/leadership check going to bounce?

Money is deposited into the leadership bank via encouragement. If there is no consistent deposit into the bank of Mike's life, he is going to burn out quickly, grow to hate you, or simply leave the relationship without warning.

Encouraging Leadership

There are three areas in my life that need my continual focus on encouragement: my wife, my kids, and the people under my care at The Vine. Recently, my wife and I have been talking about our oldest child and his need for constant correction. He is having a bit of a bad attitude about school, and it seems to be a persistent thorn in my wife's side as she homeschools. She feels like she has to be "on him" all the time.

We chatted about this concept of deposits and withdrawals and renewed our focus on making deposits of encouragement in our children. If all they hear is correction with no words of encouragement we run the danger of provoking them to anger (Eph. 6:4).

Think of people who have led you in the past. Who are those leaders you loved following? I would be willing to bet that for most of you, the leaders you most loved were those who excelled at encouraging you even as they challenged you to grow.

Now think of those people who have lead you in the past who you didn't exactly enjoy following. I would be willing to bet that those leaders were probably not strong in the encouragement department.

Growing as an Encourager

Obviously, this is a simple concept but quite difficult to master. To grow as an encourager, consider three actions points to implement in your rhythms of life and leadership:

• When you walk into a room with your spouse, your kids, or those under your care at church - really, any leadership setting - try and make a discipline out of speaking words of encouragement in short bursts of improvised blessing. Just make a habit out of it. Make the first thing that comes out of your mouth a simple word of encouragement.

• Many years ago at a conference, I remember Bill Hybels saying that every day when he came into the office he would start the day by writing out five hand-written notes of encouragement to five of the hundreds of people who were under his pastoral authority. This stuck with me for a reason. It's powerful.

• Have parties with your people. And when you do, make a habit of publicly blessing those under your care with words of life in the presence of all those gathered. This will set an amazing tone for the whole group and the person being recognized will be immensely blessed.

What other ways could you think of?

As a leader, withdrawals are going to be necessary. Are you making sure there is money in the bank? In what ways could you be a much more effective leader by pursing continual encouragement of the people under your care?

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up. - 1 Thess. 5:11

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Zach Nielsen is one of the pastors at The Vine Church in Madison, Wisconsin, where he serves in the areas of preaching, leadership development and music. He is a graduate of the University of Northern Iowa and Covenant Theological Seminary and blogs at Take Your Vitamin Z. Twitter: @znielsen

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For more resources on leadership, check out Tony Merida's eBook Proclaiming Jesus.

For more free articles on leadership, read: Spiritual Strength Training by David Murray, The Gospel Grid by Jeff Medders, and 5 Ways to Keep Church Discipline from Seeming Weird by Jared Wilson.

Superhero Films and Human Longing

I was nearly eight years of age when I rose early on a Saturday morning to watch the premiere of  Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers. My Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fascination was coming to a close and I needed a new fix. The Red Ranger was the fearless leader, and my friends and I would argue over who would pretend to be him and who would get stuck as the nerdy Blue Ranger. (Of course, back in my day, we went outside to play!) On top of that, I loved superhero comics and television/film incarnations, especially those starring Batman. Let's not forget that Emmitt Smith was a superhero in his own right, seemingly invincible on the football field. I was a boy's boy, not much different than your average boy today. But is this superhero fixation merely a boyhood fantasy? Shouldn't we grow out of this?

The Transcendency of Superhero Worship

In the past decade, superhero worship has been revived largely due to the plethora of films starring such characters as Batman, Superman, The Avengers and related characters, and Spider-Man. Since Spider-Man dominated the box office in 2002, superhero movies have amassed double-digit billions in ticket sales. Most recently, The Avengers and Dark Knight Rises have combined to gross $1 billion in just three months and are not near finished. These crowds have not consisted of only forty-something comic book junkies and young children. These spandex-clad giants of the big screen have transcended gender, age, race, religion, and socioeconomic status. At the midnight showing of Dark Knight Rises, I saw a black man wearing a Batman costume and a high school girl dressed as Joker. I witnessed a family including children and elderly saving seats for the corporate affair. There we were, all over the map demographically, begging Bruce Wayne to convince us how "anyone can be Batman."

Beyond the action, comedy, and cinematic wonderment exists a much more telling indictment of the human condition. There is a reason that the intrigue of superhuman ability surpasses all demographic boundaries.

The fantasy world of superheroes acts as a window to the soul. Mankind, made in the image of God and given the keys to creation, has not scratched the surface of its original design. Even at our highest, we will always crash into the ceiling of reality in a broken world. We claw and scratch for that which we cannot be. We make idols out of anything that brings us self-worth or offers a glimpse into an otherworldly opportunity for perfection and unyielding power. We intrinsically know that we are feeble, unable to repair the most base-level fractures in life. Should we be surprised that the first appearance of Superman was during the Great Depression?

What Shall We Say Then?

The skeptic may argue that Christians exalting Jesus is no different than any other infatuation with the uncanny. It is certainly true that the person and work of Christ is an appealing story to fallen mankind. Not only did he do the impossible in so many ways, but he presents us with an opportunity to join him in glorification. He offers hope beyond the depravity of the world around us. Indeed, Tim Keller might say that Christ is the true and better superhero. However, beyond archaeological and scientific apologetics that can be used as foundational proof for belief in Christ (as they justifiably should be), we must believe in our hearts and confess with our lips that God did in fact write a much more exceptional storyline than Christopher Nolan could ever conjure up in all his worldly genius. Faith takes us beyond the delusion. In light of this, we must exhibit this habitually in the fruit of our character and on the mission field of life.

Let's be clear, watching and enjoying superhero films is not wrong or sinful; what is wrong and sinful is believing that you can accomplish any feat that matters for eternity apart from Christ. You see, where superheroes fail is that they all have weaknesses and baggage that they carry along with them into any mission. The people of God, on the other hand, carry with them the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit. With God, not only can "anyone be Batman" - anyone can make Batman look like a schoolgirl. Christians have the ability to accomplish that which no man can do on their own. Christ has conquered sin and death, the greatest foes that have or will ever exist. Through him we have the opportunity - the obligation - to be his ambassadors to this world; to bring restoration.

As Christians engage the world, we must understand the fundamental contamination that exists. The human heart will quickly incline toward Superman's ability to fly or Batman and Iron Man's fortune-funded gadgets. Beyond the screen, Jesus Christ has risen from the dead and offers real escape from death and the limitations of our battered minds and bodies. May we leave behind all apparitions of potential completeness and hook ourselves to the anchor of our souls, the Lord Jesus Christ.

And above all, may we share this truth with a society clamoring for a world outside of themselves.

Laying Foundations for Spiritual Growth

When my two sons were young we went to Atlanta for the groundbreaking of one of the more famous skyscrapers. We had been reading about the project for months in the local papers and were excited to watch the construction of the “tallest building in the South”. As we arrived on the scene, the bulldozers were already clearing the site, but there was a viewing area for spectators with an architectural rendering of the completed structure emblazoned on the side of the construction fencing. “Wow!” my oldest exclaimed, “It’s humongous!” And indeed it was, soaring nearly seventy stories above Peachtree Street, it certainly promised to be a focal point of the city skyline. We faithfully trekked to the site and watched trucks haul away dirt and debris while other trucks delivered steel girders and other building materials. After several weeks of this vigil, one of the boys exclaimed in frustration, “Dad, when are they going to start working on the building?” (It was a question that I had pondered myself, because all that existed was a large hole and lots of mud.) Approaching a worker with a set of plans under his arm, I inquired, “Can you give us some idea when the building is going to begin?” His chuckle made it obvious the question had come up before. “It’s hard to believe it,” he said, “but this hole is the most important part of the building. We have to dig down several hundred feet and build a solid foundation to support a structure that’s over seventy stories tall. It will take several months to pour the concrete and sink the steel pillars, but then we’ll start going up. Once we start, it will rise pretty fast!”

The Bible compares living the Christian life with constructing a building. Just as there are phases in building a building, there are phases in the growth of a Christian, and the first phase is: “laying a foundation.” Our initial salvation experience is the beginning of a process of growth that lasts a lifetime. The success of our spiritual growth is determined by the strength of our spiritual foundation. Matthew 7: 24-27 asserts that the Christian life built on a solid foundation will withstand the storms of life. The tallest building in the South is still standing today. Believers who lay solid foundations are more likely to stand tall than those who fail to establish a solid base for growth. This foundations phase actually consists of four interconnecting parts:

1. relating to God,
2. relating to other Christians,
3. understanding truth, and
4. applying truth so that it transforms us.

Let’s explore these together!

Relating to God

Unlike other religions, the essence of Christianity is a relationship with God, not a set of rules. In John 17: 3 the Scripture affirms that eternal life is all about knowing God. It is thrilling to remember that God desires a relationship with us that will never end. The great news is that believers don’t have to wait for heaven to experience this. It begins the moment we accept Christ!

Having a relationship with God is not all that different from having a relationship with anyone else. As we relate to others, we get to know them better and the relationship deepens over time. There are specific situations that will help believers better experience a relationship with God. The first of these involves setting aside time for personal devotions, a quiet time each day devoted to prayer, Bible reading, and personal meditation. The Scripture promises in James 4: 8 that as we “come near to God, he will come near to us”. This “coming near to God” is not a religious duty, but a time for relational development. Of course just as good disciplines and habits can be beneficial in other areas of life, the more we remain faithfully committed to our quiet time, the more benefit we derive from it.

Another aspect of developing a relationship with God is attending public worship in a church that exalts him. Although we can worship God any place, any time, worshipping with other Christians deepens and develops our ability to relate to God. There are many different public worship experiences and not all churches structure them in the same way.

Worship that focuses on the greatness of God and includes times of singing praise, prayerful meditation, and Biblical preaching should be a priority. Ask God to help you find a church in your community and become a part of the fellowship. This leads to another important part of laying a good foundation: relating to other Christians.

Relating to Other Christians

God has placed us in his spiritual family, the Church, to encourage us, protect us, correct us, direct us, and provide for us. Again there are specific situations that help believers experience relationships with other Christians. Each of these plays a unique role in helping to form a spiritual foundation and each will require some effort. But they all are incredibly beneficial. Christians who do not have connections with other Christians tend to stop growing. (cf. Hebrews 10: 24-25)

In the first century there were very few church buildings. Mostly the believers met together in private homes for Bible teaching, prayer, and fellowship. There are benefits to meeting with large groups in public worship, but there is also an advantage gained from being part of a small group. The intimacy of the setting provides a place for relationships to flourish. Many modern believers have learned that meeting together in small groups helps to forge close relationships as members discuss Scripture, pray for each other, and share personal matters.

The term “mentoring” was coined by the modern business community to describe a relationship where a seasoned executive tutors a younger colleague in commercial practices. But long before mentoring was introduced to the world of commerce, it had already existed in the spiritual community as “one-to-one discipleship”.

In this case it describes an intentional relationship between a young believer and a more mature Christian who models the Christian life, answers questions, gives counsel, and helps the younger Christian stay focused on the priorities of spiritual growth.

Understanding Truth

One important priority for growth (and the third part of laying good foundations) involves developing an increasing understanding of God’s truth. The Bible is the Book of Truth for Christians, but it can appear overwhelming to a new learner. It was Jesus who proclaimed that knowing truth sets people free from the bondage of sin. Therefore, it is helpful to have a basic plan of study for learning the truths that we need to build upon, a plan that focuses on specific themes and principles of foundational development. A good beginning series of studies for young believers should include the themes mentioned earlier: truth that helps someone to know more about God, truth that helps people understand other people, and truth that helps someone to grow spiritually.

There are specific approaches to gaining an understanding of these foundational truths. The first is a curriculum of systematic instruction. This is the first of a series of “Pocket Principles” that are designed specifically for helping new believers lay solid spiritual foundations. If you received this “Pocket Principle” from a mentor or small group leader, continue to work closely with that person to discover and apply the other truths in this series.

Another way of gaining insights into living the Christian life is by reading. There are many excellent materials and resources available in Christian bookstores, libraries, and on the Internet. Your own informal reading will supplement your spiritual growth. But be sure to focus on the foundational themes mentioned above as a starting point.

Your local church is also an excellent source of content. Besides the weekly sermon delivered by the pastor or other teacher, many churches offer small groups devoted to helping new believers get established in the faith. Consult the churches in your area for opportunities to learn foundational truths.

Applying Truth

But as important as truth is in the growth process, it is not the information alone that transforms us. In fact other parts of Scripture warn us that knowledge by itself can be dangerous, leading to spiritual pride and the deadening of our hearts to God. This particular sin characterized the Pharisees who were enemies of Christ. It is only truth that is obeyed or applied to our lives that changes us and causes growth. Romans 12: 2 reminds us that it is a life consecrated to obeying God that is impacted by truth. When our minds are transformed in this way we help establish the will of God on earth. This is more than just knowing the truth, it is actually doing truth.

A skyscraper is an engineering marvel, but soaring high means digging deep and laying solid foundations. A maxim of the Christian life asserts that “you can only grow as tall as you grow deep”. Laying good foundations takes time and effort, but the benefits are worth it. The new believer needs to embrace experientially the truths related to knowing and understanding God and other believers.

The Foundations of Spiritual Growth

Applying truth will require becoming involved in specific situations that facilitate foundational growth. Establishing a time for personal devotions, joining a small group, locating an older believer who can come alongside you as an encouraging mentor, setting up a systematic plan of study , and participating in public worship are layers of spiritual brick and mortar that form this foundation. But these situations without a heart commitment to obey the truth will not suffice. Blessings to you as you grow!

• So where are you laying foundations?
• Where do you find is the best place to find a mentor?
• Have you made time for studying God’s word?
• What are some of the things you have done to help lay foundations for growing in your faith as a Christian?

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Robert D. (Bob) Dukes is the President and Executive Director of Worldwide Discipleship Association (WDA*) headquartered in Fayetteville, Georgia. He is the author/co-author of many educational publications and articles including: A Biblical Framework for Disciple Building; A Practical Strategy for Disciple Building; Disciple Building for Small Groups; and Disciple Building for Life Coaches.  He serves as a founding member of The Steering Committee for The Pierce Center for Disciple Building at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary in Boston, MA.

WDA is an international training organization specializing in Christian discipleship. WDA establishes interdenominational training centers on university campuses, seminaries, and in communities around the world, and forges partnerships with other Christian organizations. WDA staff and associates equip current and emerging generations of leaders, and offer seminars and training resources to help local churches develop progressive discipleship strategies.

Editor's Note: This article is reposted with permission from WDA's Laying Foundations. This is the first Pocket Principle in the Knowing God Series. For more resources on digging deeper into a creative & restorative relationship with God through the gospel of Christ, check out Grow: Reproducing Through Organic Discipleship by Winfield Bevins. For more free articles of applying the gospel to your everyday life, read: Making Disciples is Not Just for Super Christians by Nathan Creitz, Meditating on God's Word - Memorization by Tony Merida, & Discipling the Disillusioned by Andrew Byers.

What a Cuban Refugee Taught Me About Christ

Juan Baldor, a Spanish professor at Dallas Baptist University, came to America with his parents and brother at the age of 11. Fidel Castro had risen to power in Cuba not long before, promising freedom from oppression and equality for all. Baldor went with his father to Castro's rallies, he collected Cuban revolutionary cards like American kids collected baseball cards, and his family thanked God that dictatorship in Cuba was gone. It did not take long for the Baldor family to learn that Castro was full of lies and was beginning a regime that would rob his countrymen of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

With a sack full of belongings, a change of clothes, and empty pockets, the Baldor family came to America, just months before the fiasco of the Cuban Missile Crisis. Free to pursue his dreams once again, Baldor's father landed a position mowing highway medians with the City of Dallas and eventually climbed the ladder to head of one of the city departments. It was a modest wage, but for the senior Baldor this rise to leadership represented all of the reasons why his family left everything they owned back in Cuba. The Baldor's were free.

I spent nearly two and a half hours listening to and speaking with Professor Baldor about Cuba, politics, and the true price of freedom. My patriotism was bolstered as I contemplated my own freedoms that I take for granted so effortlessly. More importantly, though, Professor Baldor stirred in my soul a deep appreciation for Jesus.

"If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed" (John 8:32).

True Freedom

For all the ways that Christianity is belittled and mocked in our country, we are still free to assemble, to promote, and to believe openly in Christ. We are truly blessed to have such liberty. Make no mistake, even if all of these freedoms were ripped away from America in an instant, we would still have the beautiful, ultimate, eternal privilege of knowing and being known by the Creator of the Universe.

Satan packages sin as freedom, convincing people that there is something to be gained. Much like a lying politician seeking to deceive the masses, we are fed that holy living is bondage. These false freedoms are veiled slavery that robs human beings of the privilege of seeking real truth.

Countries rise and fall, as do their leaders, but our Triune God reigns and rules forever. Life in Christ, this new creation, is the only real hope that we will ever have. Professor Baldor put it this way: "When you lose ambition, something to hope for and work toward, you lose a part of your soul." Our souls are lost without Christ, headed for certain destruction as we trade God's presence for a bite of temptuous fruit. As the Baldor's tasted life when they stepped on American soil, they were experiencing only a shadow of the true freedom that comes from Christ himself. The misery of slavery to sin is much more powerful and poignant than anything Castro, Hitler, Stalin, or any other evil human being can extend.

May we thank God not only for political deliverance, but even more so for the great mercy and grace that he pours out upon his adopted sons and daughters.

When is the Gospel Not Good News?

Sometimes when we share our faith, we can sense the message is not getting through. We can feel that the good news we have about God’s love for the people of the world - highlighted and evidenced through Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection - just doesn’t resonate as good news with the hearers of the message. How should we respond when the gospel is not “Good News”? If you are anything like me, you'll heartily agree that the message of the cross is in fact “Good News.” The gospel has the ability to inwardly transform a person so that the change in their heart spills out into the visible world of the gospel recipient. We believe that the gospel has the power to transform a person from the inside out and that this transformation is indeed good news to those who would receive it by simple faith.

So why do people reject the amazing truth that the gospel is good news? Here are three simple reasons. They are not exhaustive, and I am sure you can think of many more to add to the list:

When They are Not Ready to Receive the Good News

A wheel chair is an amazing invention! It provides a person the means to move from one place to another often with a good amount of independence. It can enhance the life of a person who has lost the use of their legs. It may raise that person’s self esteem if previously they have felt home-bound or isolated. It can enable them to participate in community or sporting events.

I imagine most of us able bodied people have not thought about this before. A wheelchair is good news to someone who has lost use of their legs – but to an able bodied person it is more than likely just ‘interesting’ news. The difference is found in the need for the wheelchair. Most of us do not need a wheelchair. Therefore we would be unlikely to value information about them.

The gospel is like this: many people do not receive the gospel simply because they do not yet perceive their need for it. This is why it is essential that we continue to preach the whole gospel that without God we are lost. Without Jesus, we are separated from God’s love and from God himself. Without the cross, there is no way back to the Father. Many people simply do not see their need for God. He is outside their need list. As preachers and missionaries we must communicate the gospel at a person’s point of need. This requires us to get to know people relationally and personally. This takes time as we will need to observe and listen to those we are sharing the gospel with.

When Their Hearts are Hard to the Good News

It is not unusual to come across someone who has hardened themselves to the good news that God loves them. Many people have hardened their hearts to Jesus. This is to be expected in a fallen and broken world. It is well known that when people are hurting they often put up defenses against being hurt again. These walls surround the heart and are often set up not just against human hurts but also against God who is perceived to be to blame.

The gospel shows us that God reaches out in love, and love is exactly what hurting people need. Think back over your life. When you were hurt by others how did you respond? I know that even with God on my side I have often taken offence and built mental barriers between myself and others (God included!) in order to ‘protect’ myself. Your friends and family are human like you. They will need the gospel to be incarnated in your lifestyle, actions, and compassion. Not only in your words. A simple response of active love is the first step to softening a persons’ heart toward you and the loving God we serve. Small steps and words of love are God’s good news to those who are hurting.

When They Don’t See Enough Evidence of the Good News

“But I have shown them so many passages of the Bible that prove who Jesus is and what he has done..." Have you ever felt this way? We might be moved to despair or frustration when our loved ones are not coming to Jesus.

Sharing scriptural support for belief in the gospel is good, but the gospel is not about revealing scripture to people. It is about revealing Jesus to people. We need to back up the verbal gospel message with lives that reflect the truth of the gospel. Our lives need to be bearing the fruit of the gospel that transforms us from the inside out. People need to see the fruit of the Holy Spirit evidenced in the day to day things we do. It’s not going to church that will convince a person that the gospel works (although it might!). It’s not just reading your Bible or praying that a person needs to see (although they might!).

They need to see how you handle conflict in Godly ways. How you treat your spouse. How you show hospitality unconditionally. How you make yourself available when needs arise. How you speak. How you act. Everything. It is sad but true that often the worst ‘advertisement’ for the gospel is the carrier of the gospel – me and you. I pray that this would not be the reason our friends, families, neighbors, work colleagues, and enemies reject the gospel. When people don't see the evidence, we need to return to God to soften our hearts to Him as we surrender our lives afresh to Him.

As we share the gospel, we need to really discern where the hearer is at in life and faith:

Are they oblivious to their need? Help them to see their need. Listen like Jesus

Are they hurting? Let the gospel be given in love in order to bring healing. Love like Jesus.

Do they lack true evidence that the Gospel transforms? Make sure your life matches up to gospel values. Live like Jesus.

---

Stuart McCormack has worked as a shelf stacker, bingo caller, archivist, Youth Minister and is currently living out his calling to missional living in the secular workspace as a Targeted Youth Support Worker/mentor.  He co-leads “Vintage,” a missional community which is part of Kairos Network Church based in Harrogate North Yorkshire.  He is husband to Jenna and father to Noah, Bella and Sophia. In his spare time he tweets @missionalrev and blogs at www.missionalrev.wordpress.com

I Am Satisfied

Jesus says that being a disciple requires denying ourselves, taking up our cross and following Him. If this is true, why is it possible to look across the landscape of Evangelicalism in America and see so little self-denial, cross bearing, following of Jesus? Why is prosperity theology so dominant in the American landscape? Why do Christians seem to struggle so intensely with the presence of pain in their lives? Could it be that we have misrepresented Jesus and His gospel? Could it be that we have corrupted the gospel into little more than an obligatory step in the process of judgment removal? In other words, is it a “get out of hell” card, and little more?

Consider the words of Isaiah 26:7-9;

The path of the righteous is level; you make level the way of the righteous. 8 In the path of your judgments, O LORD, we wait for you; your name and remembrance are the desire of our soul. 9 My soul yearns for you in the night; my spirit within me earnestly seeks you.

Notice the words of Isaiah. He “longs” for God. His spirit “earnestly seeks” God. He says that God’s “name and remembrance” are the desire of his soul. I think this passage illustrates for us one of the massive missing elements in our understanding and telling of the gospel.

Often we speak of the gospel in terms of release from judgment. “You don’t want to go to hell when you die, do you?” Maybe more popular than that, “Do you know for sure, if you were to die tonight, that you would go to heaven?”. Using these popular forms of gospel telling we communicate an idea that each person has some sort of eternal obligation to “choose Christ” if we want to escape eternal judgment. Once they are convinced, we move from that to instructing the “new believer” in how they should live their life if they are to follow Christ. Behavior modification follows, and is incessant in its advance.

As a result, many make “decisions” for Christ, and then wonder why nothing is different. They wonder where this abundant life is that Jesus so readily promised. What often follows, then, is that they drop out of their faith practice at a horrific rate, and we chalk up their denial of the faith as another example of Satan at work, or maybe even a lack of commitment on their part. Maybe it is those things, or maybe it is something more?

When we consider the words of God in the Old Testament, as we have already seen, and the words of Jesus in the New Testament, we see an entirely different picture. We see a picture of a God who sees humanity mired in the quagmire of death-advancing sin. In spite of our inability to save ourselves, He takes it upon Himself to murder His Son in an effort to flood the world with grace, while remaining just and righteous at the same time. For those who would believe in Him, He promises eternal life, but this eternal life is not just “heaven”. No, it is something much more significant, and much more immediate. He promises that our eternal life, this state of eternal satisfaction with God, begins at the moment we trust in Jesus.

Consider the language that the psalmist uses in Psalm 67 to describe the response of those in distant nations who trust in God for the first time.

May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face to shine upon us, 2 that your way may be known on earth, your saving power among all nations. 3 Let the peoples praise you, O God; let all the peoples praise you! 4 Let the nations be glad and sing for joy, for you judge the peoples with equity and guide the nations upon earth. 5 Let the peoples praise you, O God; let all the peoples praise you!

Praise! Joy! Singing in exultation! These are the characteristics of the redeemed! This is what seems to be so radically missing in our telling of our faith. God satisfies, and He satisfies completely.

This is why Jesus can call us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him. In the church today we often seem to communicate this as if it is some sort of obligatory hardship, when Jesus is saying to us that it is an incredibly uneven trade. We give up ourselves, and we replace us, with Him! Denial of self is not drudgery, it is undeserved privilege! When we understand the depth of the satisfaction of Jesus, it is no big thing to trade in everything else for Him.

This is why the prosperity gospel is so appealing. We all deeply want to be satisfied, and the prosperity gospel affirms that. It believes that man should be completely satisfied, but it wrongly assumes that this satisfaction comes from more stuff, and not the Savior. As such, this false gospel must be condemned as the idol worship it is.

This is why faithful, authentic followers of Jesus can walk through excruciating pain, and yet still trust in God. Our satisfaction is not bound up in the momentary circumstances. We are satisfied with Jesus, and He is enough. This is why Job could say, “Though he slay me, I will hope in him.”

C.S. Lewis rightly identified the sad condition of the human heart when he said;

We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by an offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

When the woman at the well came to Jesus, she was looking for a bit of water. Jesus, however, graced her with something far superior. He promised her living water which would never run dry. This was not just some allegorical term for life that would not end. This was a clear picture of the deeply soul satisfying life with Jesus. Everything else will fall short and lead one to emptiness, sadness and humanistic self-advancement. It will not satisfy. Jesus, on the other hand, satisfies, satisfies completely and alone satisfies.

So, do not settle for anything but Him. Ask yourself, like Isaiah, if you long for the presence of God? As you walk through struggle, run to Jesus. When you long for more than you have, find satisfaction in Jesus. When it seems like things do not happen as they should, trust in Jesus. Nothing else matters and nothing else provides, like Jesus.

-

Cross-posted from Micah's personal blog.

Big Book Giveaway (Round 1)

  Often times, new websites have a hard time getting off the ground. Admittedly, we have been overwhelmed by the support Project TGM is already receiving... but that won't stop us from shameless promotion by giving away freebies!

The Goods

Compliments of Crossway Books, we are giving away:

Rules of Engagement

Here's how to enter:

• "Like" us on Facebook
• Share the "FREE BOOKS" post pinned at the top of our Facebook page
• Follow us on Twitter
• Retweet the "FREE BOOKS" post on our Twitter
• EXTRA CREDIT: Follow each of our contributors on Twitter

There will be five winners!

• One person wins the package of all four books
• Four others win one of the four books

May the odds be ever in your favor.........

*** Contest ends August 19, 2012 at 11:59 p.m. CST ***

The Intertwining of Theology, Gospel, Mission

Theology. Gospel. Mission. Let’s be honest. These words have not only been heard by many, but also defined by many. Trying to get 10 people in a room to agree to a definition of these would be like trying to get Obama and Bush to throw a birthday party for Ralph Nader. That’s right, I figured out a way to mention Ralph Nader in a post on theology, gospel, and mission.

I am not going to try and negate other definitions of these things but, rather, give insight on how I work these three terms out in my life on a daily basis.

When we think of these terms, it might be helpful to see them in this light:

1. Theology: Who is God?
2. Gospel: What has he done? Who are we?
3. Mission: What do we do?

When we can break these terms out in this way, it creates for us an umbrella that is easier to work out the understandings and intertwining of each with the other.

Theology: Who is God?

To work out the understanding of the gospel or mission, we need to first understand the character of God and who he is. God isn’t who he is because of what he does, but he just is who he is and out of his being comes his doing. This is exactly what he told Moses: “Tell the Egyptians, I am who I am.”

We learn who God is by the story he has written for us. We see over and over again in the story how he is defined. He is defined as love, a provider, a shield, a rock, wisdom, infinite, powerful, etc.

Many people like to overcomplicate theology and make it far more difficult than needed. I am not saying that there will not be some great debates in theology, but if more and more people immersed themselves in the overall story of God shown to us in the Bible, it gets far less complicated.

The more and more we understand who God is, the more and more we can see those things that are consistent with what he does.

I was recently talking to a young man who is my intern. He asked why something in his life was not working out how that he wanted. He didn’t know why God was allowing this trial to happen. I directed him back to the understanding of who God is. We know he is trustworthy, we know he is infinite, we know he is loving, we know he is our Dad, we know he is in control of all things. If this is true, can we trust that even though we are going through a trial, that God has it handled and he is one whom we can trust and submit to? He agreed, and went back to his Dad to pray that his faith would be increased.

If you don’t understand who God is first and jump right into what he does/has done, it won’t make sense. Plus, you can then attribute things to him that are outside of his character and blame God instead of trust him.  If this young man didn’t understand who God is, or I didn’t point him to those facts, then we can just come to the conclusion that God is mean and vindictive because we base God’s character on what we see… not what he’s told us.

The Gospel: What has God done?

If we understand who God is, then we can see clearly what he’s done.  The big mistake for most “evangelists” is they hand out the Gospel of John, without any reference to the reality of who God is (the entirety of the Scriptures… specifically the Old Testament).

If we know that God is love, wise, perfect, infinite, trustworthy, all powerful, etc. then we can move on to what he does out of his character. When we keep reading in the Scriptures that because God is love he is always pursuing his people (even though they are continually sinning), forgiving his people, disciplining his people and in a relationship with his people, we can then understand even further the good news, called the gospel.

When we learn that we are sinners, separated from God in need of a Savior to live a life on our behalf, die on our behalf, and raise to new life so we can be given the Spirit, it comes as no surprise when we learn that God sent his Son on our behalf. (I know there is a lot more to this story, but we want to be brief)

Why are we not surprised? Because it is completely consistent with his character and how he has always operated.  Not only that, but we can see how our Savior Jesus is the fulfillment of the shadows given in the stories previous to his coming. Again… consistent.

It is paramount that we know the story, and continually rehearse the story to ourselves and others in our community. Because the fact is, the gospel isn’t something that merely happens to us when we check a box, walk the aisle, and get dunked in tub with cheers and photographs. It happens the next day when we fall into sin and again, needing a Savior constantly.

When we realize who God is and the fact of what he’s done, we can see that our God is going to keep pursuing us, forgiving us, disciplining us and desires to have a relationship with us… because that’s how he has always operated.

The Gospel: Who are we?

We can’t skip over this important understanding. If God is who he is because of who he is and out of that is what he does, and we are made in his image, we need to realize we are the same way.

Out of our being, comes our doing.

Like my friend Caesar Kalinowski says, “We are human beings, not human doings.”

The fact is, that because of who God is and what he has done, we are now made new. We are now children of God, heirs to the throne. This has nothing to do with what we’ve done, but entirely of what God has done on our behalf.  God gives us a new identity.  Now we are not enemies of God, but his disciples.

If this is true, then it cannot be taken and our worth will never be gauged by our activities. We will never be told who we are because of our failures or successes.  We have to realize that we are already God’s children and accepted by him.

What is great about this is that we don’t even have to muster up on our own the belief in these truths, but God has sent his Spirit to comfort us, to confirm us, and to give us his power as the down payment for the glorified time to come when we join our God in Heaven.

Sure, fruit will flow from this, but we are never proven by our efforts, they are just an outflow of who God has now made us through his power, love, pursuit, and wisdom.

This is why it is so easy for Paul to say that he is the chief of all sinners, yet an adopted son of God. To live is Christ, to die is gain.

The Mission: What do we do?

After realizing who we are – changed, renewed, and made a child of God by his power – our first question in light of this is, “What should we now do?”

It’s quite obvious if one looks to what we have deemed “The Great Commission”:

Then the eleven disciples left for Galilee, going to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. When they saw him, they worshiped him—but some of them doubted!

Jesus came and told his disciples, “I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

Matthew 28:16-20

Notice some things before we get into the commission. First, they worshiped, but some still doubted! This gives me great comfort. Even though they had just seen with their eyes the risen Jesus, they still doubted. This did not remove them from God’s love, forgiveness, family, or mission though… Jesus just continues to tell them in the midst of their doubts that HE has been given all authority, NOT us. Not only this, but in Acts 1:8 Jesus repeats himself that the Spirit will give us power to be his witnesses to make disciples, not us.

So, not only is our identity all based on the works of Jesus, but so is our mission. This means that if we “fail” or we “succeed” (I put these terms in quotes because we all have our definition of these terms in everyday life, that might be defined different by an infinite God) God still accepts us and sends us out again for the mission.

What is the mission? This isn’t hard. Our mission is to make disciples of Jesus who then make disciples of Jesus. Everything the church does should always be asking, “How does this make disciples and are we doing it in the most effective way that is making disciples of Jesus, not us?”

We need to be asking ourselves how we can show people who Jesus is through our/their head, heart, and hands. Meaning, how can we teach them how to understand with their mind, change their hearts to know him, and then go and do likewise with their feet to all nations?

We should always be looking at the life of the church and simply ask:

• What are we doing to make disciples of Jesus?
• What are we doing that is not making disciples of Jesus? Get rid of it
• What should we be doing to make disciples of Jesus? Add this to our lives

Are we doing things that are transferable so that disciples can then make more disciples? If it’s not easily transferable to “non-pastors” then we need to simplify it or rework it so that it becomes transferable.

So, one can see that as you look at theology, gospel, and mission they are very intertwined and cannot be separated.  When one lacks, the family of God lacks.

We need to consistently be in a community that will always be evaluating if we:

1. Know who God is
2. Know what God has done and know who we now are
3. Know what we must do

And we must always be putting to the forefront the understanding that these are all by grace, by the power of God for his glory… and his glory alone.

Spiritual Strength Training - Part Two

(Editor's note: Here's Spiritual Strength Training - Part One.)

The 7 R’s of Soul Care & Maintenance

Having set the practice of Soul Care and Spiritual Strength Training in the context of the Creator/Creature relationship, I now want to take you to seven “Service Bays” in the “Soul Care Garage.” As with your car, if you regularly service your soul, you’re far less likely to experience burnout, breakdown, or a crash.

But what if you’ve failed to service your soul? What if you’ve hit the wall, crashed, and burned? Well you need to visit the same seven Service Bays. You just need to spend longer in each of them.

Service Bay 1: Routine

Regular routine is one of the first things to fall by the wayside when we become too busy. We respond to increasing ministry demands by increasing our accessibility and availability. Our regular daily routine is squeezed, then disrupted, and then displaced.

We end up feeling like passive victims waiting for things to happen – emails to arrive, phones to ring, and requests for help to knock on the door. We are knocked from pillar to post, running from one crisis to another.

Even when we get some quiet, uninterrupted time, we are so tired and wrung-out that we lack the will and discipline to use that time wisely and well. We end up doing only what we feel like doing – which is not very much – as our wills and decisiveness are so weakened.

The first question I ask burned-out pastors is: “Tell me your daily routine.” Usually the answer is “I don’t have one… Every day is different.” I press further, “Is there nothing constant from one day to another?” Again, usually the answer is “No.”

The first thing I do is to get them to draw up a basic routine of sleeping, worshipping, eating, studying, etc. that they then commit to. God is a God of order, not of confusion (1 Cor. 14:33), and as his created image-bearers we glorify him when we live regular, orderly lives. He has made our bodies so that they flourish when they have a rhythm and regularity.

Now, of course, there are elements of ministry that we cannot predict or regulate, but we can usually do a lot more than we presently are regulating. Start with regular bed times and rise times. Read and pray in the same place at the same time each day, preferably in privacy, and before you see or speak to anyone else. Set family meal times and stick to them. The more regularity you can build into your day and your week, the more your body, mind, and soul will flourish.

Service Bay 2: Relaxation

We need to incorporate times of relaxation into our lives. This may involve finding a quiet spot at regular times throughout the day to simply pause for 5-10 minutes, calm down, and seek the peace of God in our lives. Unstretch the band, let the tension go, breathe deeply, pray, and remember God.

Jesus recognized his disciples need for relaxation when he took them “apart into a desert place, and rested a while” (Mark 6:31).

You’ll find lots of websites and books that outline many varied relaxation techniques. These are usually effective and easy to learn. Once you try some of these you’ll soon learn how tense you actually are. Many of us are living like a flexed muscle, coiled tight from tip-to-toe. Is it any wonder that we’re exhausted and feel aches and pains all over?

Many of us actually need to learn how to breathe properly again. When we are stressed, anxious, and tense, our breathing becomes shallow, starving our body and brain of oxygen, increasing the difficulty of physical and intellectual work. Again, websites abound with exercises that will help you to become conscious of your breathing habits and re-train them if you’ve learned bad habits.

As I mentioned before, creative breakthroughs are often made in quiet downtimes. I believe many preachers could do with working less on their sermons. What I mean by that is getting away from the commentaries and the computer and communing with God in quiet reflective walks. There are computer sermons, and there are communion sermons! There are sermons that collate others thoughts, and there are sermons that flow out of communion with God in his Word.

Service Bay 3: Recreation

Bodily exercise is profitable. Moderate physical exercise helps to expel unhealthy chemicals from our system and stimulates the production of helpful chemicals. Outdoor exercise has the added benefit of the sun’s healing rays. Spurgeon said: “The next best thing to the grace of God for a preacher is oxygen.”

John Wesley attributed his great age and remarkable usefulness even in his eighties to God’s power, prayer, and his regular exercise in the fresh air! William Blaikie said: “It is very certain that due attention to physical exercise is an essential condition of sustained vigorous preaching. The command to be “strong in the Lord” includes strength of body as well of strength of soul.”

Is God glorified in our bodies (1 Cor. 6:20) when we rob them of what they need to function properly? Do we glorify our Creator when we remain willingly ignorant of or reject the knowledge he has kindly provided in his created order, information that we need to keep our bodies healthy?

Service Bay 4: Rest

A Christian psychologist recently said to me that he starts most depressed people on three pills: “Good exercise, good diet, and good sleep!” That’s great advice, and I would encourage you to make use of the plentiful resources available today on these subjects.

As regular sleep patterns enable the body and mind to repair and re-charge, set fixed times for going to bed and getting up, and try to get a minimum of seven (and an ideal of eight hours) of sleep per night.

Remember God’s gift of weekly rest. Secure a weekly intellectual Sabbath to refresh your mind. The devotion of one day to rest will not lose you time but rather help you to gain it as the other days will be more decisive and vigorous.

My wife has forced me to take one day off a week throughout my ministry. Usually it was a Monday as we were home-schooling. Perhaps twice I managed to persuade her that I really needed to work on my day of rest. Both weeks were a disaster. Overall I accomplished less than I would have had I taken the day off and properly rested my body and mind.

It doesn’t say, “Six days you shall labor… unless you are a pastor who must work seven.” It’s a command. "Six days you shall labor, but the seventh is to be a Sabbath of rest.” It takes faith to obey this. Reason and society says, “If you work seven days, you’ll get more done!” But as you practice weekly Sabbath, you will begin to see how gracious, merciful, and wise God’s commands are.

Service Bay 5: Reprioritize

As our lives slowly yet inexorably grow more complicated and committed, especially in the ministry, we must regularly examine our life and see what we can do to reduce our commitments and obligations. We all do this to some extent – because we all realize that we cannot meet the needs of everyone – the question is more about how seriously and intentionally you do this.

Prevention is better than cure here. If you can learn to say “No” to certain ministry demands and opportunities, it’s a lot easier than having to pull out when you’ve already committed and raised expectations.

You will need to cut out many good things to do the best things. You will need to cut out some ministry to others in order to minister to yourself. The life of the minister is the life of his ministry (Acts 20:28; 1 Tim. 4:6). What’s your greatest priority? YOUR SOUL!

A pastor's duties to his wife and children are not reduced by his duty to his flock. Rather, they are increased (1 Sam. 15:22-23).

Service Bay 6: Re-think

The final two R’s are especially important for those who feel that they’ve crash and burned.

One of the most common signs of burnout or depression is unhelpful thought patterns, which tend to distort our view of reality in a false and negative way. As the writers of Mind over Mood put it, “Our perception of an event or experience powerfully affects our emotional, behavioral, and physiological responses to it.” Or, as the Bible puts it: “As [a man] thinks in his heart, so is he” (Prov. 23:7).

In my book, Christians Get Depressed Too, I describe 10 false thought patterns that reflect, but also contribute to, the symptoms of depression. Here’s a summary of some of them:

False extremes: This is a tendency to evaluate personal qualities in extreme, black-and-white categories. Shades of gray do not exist. This is sometimes called all-or-nothing thinking.

• Life example: You make one mistake in preaching a sermon conclude you are a total disaster.
• Biblical example: Despite most of his life being characterized by God’s blessing and prosperity, when Job passed through a time of suffering, he decided he must be an enemy of God (Job 13:24; 33:10).

False generalization: This happens when, after experiencing one unpleasant event, we conclude that the same thing will happen to us again and again.

• Life example: When you try to witness to someone, you are mocked, and you conclude that this will always happen to you and that you will never win a soul for Christ.
• Biblical example: At a low point in his own life, Jacob deduced that because Joseph was dead and Simeon was captive in Egypt that Benjamin would also be taken from him: “All these things are against me,” he generalized.

False filter: When we are depressed, we tend to pick out the negative in every situation and think about it alone, to the exclusion of everything else. We filter out anything positive and decide everything is negative.

• Life example: You heard something in a sermon you did not like or agree with and went home thinking and talking only about that part of the service.
• Biblical example: Despite having just seen God’s mighty and miraculous intervention on Mount Carmel, Elijah filtered out all the positives and focused only on the continued opposition of Ahab and Jezebel (1 Kings 19:10).

False transformation: We transform neutral or positive experiences into negative ones. The depressed person doesn’t ignore positive experiences. Rather, he or she disqualifies them or turns them into their opposite.

• Life example: If someone compliments you, you conclude that the person is just being hypocritical or that he or she is trying to get something from you.
• Biblical example: Jonah saw many Ninevites repent in response to his preaching. But in- stead of rejoicing in this positive experience, his mood slumped so low that he angrily asked God to take away his life (Jonah 4:3–4).

False mind reading: We may think that we can tell what someone is thinking about us, that the person hates us or views us as stupid. But such negative conclusions usually are not supported by the facts.

• Life example: Someone who used to talk to you at church now passes you with hardly a word, so you decide that you have fallen out of her favor. But, unknown to you, the person’s marriage is in deep trouble, and she is too embarrassed to risk talking to anyone.
• Biblical example: The psalmist one day concluded that all men were liars. On reflection, he admitted that this judgment was overly hasty (Ps. 116:11).

A couple more, quickly, in summary form:

False lens: This is when we view our fears, errors, or mistakes through a magnifying glass and deduce catastrophic consequences. Everything then is out of proportion. The other side of this is that while you maximize your faults with a magnifying glass, you also tend to look through the binoculars the wrong way when it comes to your assets—and minimize them.

False “shoulds”: Our lives may be dominated by “shoulds” or “oughts,” applied to ourselves or others. This heaps pressure on us and others to reach certain unattainable standards and causes frustration and resentment when we fail or when others fail us.

Step-by-Step Guide Out of False Thinking

These false thinking patterns are not only the symptoms of burnout and depression, they perpetuate and deepen them. They eventually cause physical symptoms, too. So, let me propose a biblical method that will help you to correct these false and damaging thought habits. And they are habits. We get into deep ruts in our thinking that are sometimes very difficult to get out of.

We must first identify false and unhelpful thought-patterns, then challenge them, and then change them. This isn’t optional: Christians are obliged to challenge falsehood and distortions of reality, especially when they find them in themselves.

Psalm 77 is a perfect example of Asaph’s investigating, challenging, and changing his thoughts, with God’s help, in order to raise his mood and spirits. There are also slightly more abbreviated versions of the same biblical strategy in Job 19, Psalm 42, 73, and Habakkuk 3. So, this is not “psychological mumbo-jumbo,” but true Bible-based Christian experience. In Christians Get Depressed Too, I go into this Biblical Re-thinking Training in much more detail.

Service Bay 7: Return

The aim of all these other service bays is a return to a Christ-centered life, a life lived in communion with the Lord Jesus. Yes, dare I say it, a personal relationship with Jesus. We want a life connected to him, obedient to him, imaging him, glorifying him, and worshipping him. Here are a few things I’ve found helpful in returning to the Lord:

• Guard personal Bible reading and prayer time as jealously as you guard your own children.
• Pray out loud. Find a place where you can pray out loud without embarrassment. Hearing your own prayers helps to improve the clarity and intensity of prayer.
• Make singing part of your personal and family devotions.
• Carve out uninterrupted study time in 2-3 hour blocks at least four days a week.
• Read Christ-centered books. Don’t let your love of missiology, ecclesiology, eschatology, apologetics, evangelism, etc. push out daily personal communion with Christ. Why not start with John Owen, Volume 1 on the Glory of Christ, or Volume 7 on Spiritual Mindedness; John Flavel, Volume 1 on Christ the Fountain of Life.
• Read for your own soul rather than for ministry to others. It makes a big difference to the personal edification you get from reading if, from time-to-time, you determine that you will not use anything in a certain book for ministry purposes.
• Listen to Christ-centered sermons from various pastors. We have a wealth of online resources at sites such as SermonAudio.com. I like to listen to preachers outside my own tradition as I often find their approach to texts quite refreshing and stimulating.
• Disconnect from Twitter, Facebook, email for several hours at a time. Discipline yourself to check the internet only a certain number of times a day.
• Seek accountability with another pastor or elder. Read through the 7 R’s, agree on parameters, and commit to regular accounting.

Please visit the Soul Care Garage regularly. The more frequently you visit it, the less time you will spend in each of the service bays. It will save you from the Pastor’s wrecker’s yard, and if you’re already there, get a tow over to this garage and start working your way through the bays until you’re fit for the road again!

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David Murray was a pastor in Scotland for 13 years before accepting a call in 2007 to be Professor of Old Testament and Practical Theology in Puritan Reformed Seminary. He continues to preach most Sundays in Grand Rapids and the surrounding area. He is the author of Christians Get Depressed Too and How Sermons Work. He is also President of HeadHeartHand Media, a small Christian film company. David is married to Shona and they have four children ranging from 8 to 16. You can read his blog at HeadHeartHand.org/blog or follow him on Twitter @davidpmurray.

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For more in-depth resources for pastors, check out Tony Merida's Proclaiming Jesus.

For more free articles for pastors, read: Winfield Bevins' What is Gospel-Centered Ministry, JR Vassar's Domain of Influence, Jared Wilson's Five Ways to Keep Church Discipline from Seeming Weird.

Be Fruitful and Multiply Disciples

Historically, movements have stopped because they were primarily leader-led information dumps. Information isn’t a bad thing, but information-driven movements are limited in influence. Why should we create disciple multiplying movements? How can we create them? It’s What We Were Made For In the garden of Eden, we see that image bearers of God we were made to be fruitful and multiply (Gen. 1:22, 26-28). By issuing his first “great commission,” God did not merely intend for us to have more people over for Thanksgiving dinner. Rather, he wanted his beautiful image to fill the entire earth through the multiplication of his image bearers. But through Adam, we sinned and were separated from God.

In the attempt to author our own story, we sought center stage–pushing God’s goals for us aside. We sought to multiply our image for the sake of our own fame rather than God’s fame.

When someone repents and turns to God, it is our responsibility to show them their new mission by pointing back to the garden. We must show how their mission is all about multiplying for the sake of God’s glory not multiplying a life that is all about them and their legacy.

Most small groups in churches believe their goal is to get to know each other or form a close bond. If this is the goal, multiplication will never be desired. Drawing close to one another is not the goal of missional community, but making disciples who make disciples is (being fruitful and multiplying images of Jesus). Drawing close to one another happens because Jesus has given us the same Father, and we are a part of the same family. So, forming a close bond is a bi-product rather than the goal of living together on mission as family.

This Must be on Our Lips If our goal is to make disciples who make disciples (to be fruitful and multiply), then this must be on our lips constantly. I tell those who aren’t even followers of Jesus yet, that we desire to see communities like ours across the world doing the same thing. So, when they join our community as a follower of Jesus, they’ve already been discipled to know that we desire multiplication.

But it doesn’t stop there. We continue to talk about it as a group and continue to seek to hear from the Spirit on his timing and his power to send us out. The best way I can describe this is by relating it to your child. Do you desire to see your child stay in your house until they die? Or do you desire to see them leave the house and have a family of their own? Do you then wait until they are 18 and spring this on them and then kick them out? Or, do you continue talking to them about it, train them and seek for them to be ready when the day comes to leave your house and go and be fruitful and multiply with their new family? This is the same thing we need to be doing with our church families. We need to seek to see them grow in maturity and grow in the gospel so that they too can lead a family of missionary servants to live out the effects of the gospel with those around them.

People often ask me how I make it easy for our groups to multiply. I say the same thing every time: You must regularly talk about multiplication and train the next group for its certainty. It must always be on your lips and prayers, and always on your people’s lips and prayers. If it’s not, then it will be very difficult when it happens–like kicking out your unsuspecting child and telling them it’s healthy.

Transforming and Transferable You will do well by building the foundation of multiplication. You will also do well by regularly talking about it and listening to the Spirit in the process. But what happens if you have no leaders to lead the multiplication? This is where many groups and movements fail. The reason is that people in the group look at the leader and think, “There’s no way I can do what he’s doing. This takes too much time and too much theological knowledge.” Not only that, but you’ve merely spoken about multiplication without transforming people’s hearts to seek it out.

Merely talking about making disciples is sometimes fun and it’s a great theological exercise for the mind. But mere talk and theologizing rarely inspire people to make disciples.

If you desire to see others gripped to make disciples, you must not only penetrate their intellect. You must also aim at their hearts. If you merely aim at their heads with theological reasons why it’s good to make disciples, people will always come up with reasons why they are not convinced of its realities.

I think of Jonathan Edwards when he spoke of God’s holiness and grace and compared it to honey.[1]

In this way, he says, there is a difference between having an opinion that God is holy and gracious, and having a sense of the loveliness and beauty of that holiness and grace. There is a difference between having a rational judgment that honey is sweet, and having a sense of its sweetness. A man may have the former, that knows not how honey tastes; but a man cannot have the latter unless he has an idea of the taste of honey in his mind. So there is a difference between believing that a person is beautiful, and having a sense of his beauty. The former may be obtained by hearsay, but the latter only by seeing the countenance. When the heart is sensible of the beauty and amiableness of a thing, it necessarily feels pleasure in the apprehension. It is implied in a person’s being heartily sensible of the loveliness of a thing, that the idea of it is sweet and pleasant to his soul; which is a far different thing from having a rational opinion that it is excellent.

So, we must, as leaders, show others what it means to make disciples. When a follower of Jesus sees new disciples being made, and they are a part of it, their heart will rejoice. And like honey on the lips, they will desire more honey instead of merely talking about honey. Jesus did the same with the blind man in John 9. He healed him, so that the blind man would taste and see that the Lord was good. Then he supported that heart-transforming act, to theologically tackle the implications of who Jesus was afterward in John 9:35-41. Notice the way the blind man desired others to taste and see that the Lord Jesus was good–because his heart was transformed.

Not only do we seek to transform, but we must also make sure what we do is transferable. I have many things I can share from experience that I believe are transferable for my people, but you must ask yourself these types of questions:

• Do I need a theological degree to lead the community like I do? Remember, not all people like to read and study as much as many of us pastors do. If we want to create a movement of disciple-making, then we have to move away from leading from a position of “trained” men, into leading like “untrained” men. (By the way, I’ve never been to seminary, nor am I paid by the church.)

• Do I need to be paid by the church to have the time to do what I do? See above.

• What resources are available to give future leaders so that they don’t feel like they have to think of new topics to discuss and study in their Missional Community? I do not do any book studies in the Bible that cause me to do an immeasurable amount of study and reading on my own. If I do, then people will see the group as one that can only be led by someone with my capacity. Instead, I use easily transferable studies (e.g., check out  www.bild.org)

• How can I model all of this, so that I am going to be able to transfer leadership, instead of being the functional savior for our groups? Make sure you lead as you want others to lead. Don’t do studies that can only be led by a seminarian. Don’t do so many activities that can only be done by those with a job inside the church. Remember, as you lead, you are discipling those in your group on what it looks like to lead a group of disciple-makers. You can’t say one thing and model another. They’ll see right through that.

Because I have worked hard to hear the Spirit’s leading in this, 80% of those that are a part of the Missional Communities in my expression within Soma Communities desire to lead MCs at some point. When I baptized a new disciple, he first desired to lead a group of disciple-makers. He saw this as the only option for someone who was a follower of Jesus and, that it wasn’t anything special. In spite of being a new disciple, he didn’t see this as some “high calling” only for a few.

Since we want to lay the foundation of multiplication, we regularly talk about making disciples who make disciples. We seek to do this by modeling it for them in ways easily transferable. New disciples often can’t wait to lead others in the making of disciples who multiply to make more disciples.

So, go! Be fruitful disciples of Jesus by multiplying his beautiful image everywhere.

¹ http://www.monergism.com/thethreshold/articles/onsite/edwards_light.html

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Cross-posted from Gospel-Centered Discipleship.

Yes, And vs. No, Because

Last August on vacation I read Tina Fey’s Bossypants and I’m not ashamed to say that I loved it. I laughed a lot but was also challenged by the leadership lessons that she expressed and learned through her career and from Lorne Michaels. I started to read it and think about how these lessons could shape the church and the way Christians approach God. One of the lessons she highlights is from her years of improv and specifically the rules of improv, which we used when I participated in Man Question and it changed the whole dynamic of relational interaction. She says this…

The first rule of improvisation is AGREE. Always agree and SAY YES. When you’re improvising and I say, “Freeze, I have a gun,” and you say “That’s not a gun. It’s your finger. You’re pointing your finger at me,” our improvised scene has ground to a halt. But if I say, “Freeze, I have a gun!” and you say, “The gun I gave you for Christmas! You bastard!” then we have started a scene because we have AGREED that my finger is in fact a Christmas gun.

Now, obviously in real life you’re not always going to agree with evertthing everyone says. But the Rule of Agreement reminds you to “respect what your partner has created” and to at least start from an open-minded place. Start with a YES and see where that takes you.

The second rule of improvisation is not only to say yes, but YES, AND. You are supposed to agree and then add something of your own…To me YES, AND means don’t be afraid to contribute. It’s your responsibility to contribute. Always make sure you’re adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile.

When I look at the alternative of YES, AND, it’s NO, BECAUSE which is really the beginning of an argument if you think about it. If someone presents an idea and it’s immediately met with “No, because…” how deflating is that? While Yes, And invites opportunity and creative thinking, No, Because invites debate and to follow the status quo.

She talks about how this plays out in life.

As an improviser, I always find it jarring when I meet someone in real life whose first answer is no. “No, we can’t do that.” “No, that’s not in the budget.” “No, I will not hold your hand for a dollar.” What kind of way is that to live?

But as I read it, I really started to think about the difference between church plants and established churches, which is directly related to start-ups and established companies.

Yes, And vs. No, Because in the Church

A church plant approaches everything with Yes, And. The possibilities are endless, but an established church has a No, Because filter that it runs everything through based on traditions, denominations, or “that’s just the way we do it” mentalities.

Now, I’m not suggesting we take a Yes, And approach with theology, but I am saying we do so with the way we approach “doing church” and how the church carries out the mission of God to love and serve your neighbor as yourself. In that realm, the possibilities are endless unless you have a No, Because culture.

The problem is that a No, Because culture kills any chance of creating an innovative environment for methodology. It sees new missional methodologies as challenging your “right way” instead of being open to adopting a new way of doing things that may enable you and your church to bless your neighborhood and thrive as a community that loves one another.

Cultivating a Yes, And culture where it’s “your responsibility to contribute” provides the opportunity to be open to new ideas and even new people speaking into the way things are done. It invites the voices of everyone to take ownership of the outcome.

Even when the And presents a potential contradiction to the initial idea, you are creating a collaborative environment where everyone is engaged and looking to contribute to the solution rather than maintain the status quo.

This is what happened in Man Question discussing masculinity with straight, gay, and bisexual men. The ideas eventually contradicted themselves, but the Yes, And rules provided the environment where everyone was willing to share their ideas and give credence to listen and process the ideas of others. This led to greater and deeper conversations because of the willingness to let an idea run its course with somewhat competing ideas.

When a church adopts a No, Because mentality with its methods, it is beginning the process of dying as a church. It becomes a nostalgic organization looking to keep things the way they were or maintain the current way, instead of seeing the church community do greater things than they’ve ever done.

A church should never abandon the Yes, And with methods.

Yes, And vs. No, Because with God

These thoughts have been bouncing around in my head since August and I mainly thought of them in terms of church until I went to the Brooklyn Tabernacle Prayer Meeting.

As I stood with thousands of others praying to God for healing, for reconciliation of marriages, for children to be set free from drugs, I was so challenged that my prayer life was being hindered by a No, Because mentality with God. Instead of asking God to do great things, I was saying “No, God won’t listen to that because there are more important things.” “No, I can’t pray that because I’m had a rough week with too many mistakes in my life.”

Even my theology presented a No, Because roadblock in prayer, saying “No, God doesn’t seem to do the same thing He did in the book of Acts in the Bible so I shouldn’t ask for those things.”

I began to sense that I was living in the No, Because mentality with God that I disliked seeing in the church.

Adopting the Yes, And mentality has changed the way I sit in church meetings discussing our community groups, how we equip families, how we empower people to be great at their jobs, secure in their singleness, pursuing covenant marriage at the right time.

It’s also changed how I pray, coming to talk with God with an open-mindedness that He may want to do something outside my theological box I like to put God in so I can manage my relationship with Him.

As the end of the year approaches, we all look back at what we want to change and do differently in the coming year. Adopting a Yes, And mentality may be the best thing you do for your life, your job, your ministry, and your relationship with God.

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Cross-posted from Gentrified.

Essay on the State of Evangelical Parenting

A story in The Atlantic by Lori Gottlieb entitled “How to Land Your Kid in Therapy” raises some helpful questions about modern parenting and how it is stimulating narcissism.  There is some strong language in the piece, so I’m not linking to it.  I will, however, quote a section to show the strength of the ideas in the article:

Another teacher I spoke with, a 58-year-old mother of grown children who has been teaching kindergarten for 17 years, told me she feels that parents are increasingly getting in the way of their children’s development. “I see the way their parents treat them,” she said, “and there’s a big adjustment when they get into my class. It’s good for them to realize that they aren’t the center of the world, that sometimes other people’s feelings matter more than theirs at a particular moment—but it only helps if they’re getting the same limit-setting at home. If not, they become impulsive, because they’re not thinking about anybody else.”

The point continues:

This same teacher—who asked not to be identified, for fear of losing her job—says she sees many parents who think they’re setting limits, when actually, they’re just being wishy-washy. “A kid will say, ‘Can we get ice cream on the way home?’ And the parent will say, ‘No, it’s not our day. Ice-cream day is Friday.’ Then the child will push and negotiate, and the parent, who probably thinks negotiating is ‘honoring her child’s opinion,’ will say, ‘Fine, we’ll get ice cream today, but don’t ask me tomorrow, because the answer is no!’” The teacher laughed. “Every year, parents come to me and say, ‘Why won’t my child listen to me? Why won’t she take no for an answer?’ And I say, ‘Your child won’t take no for an answer, because the answer is never no!’”

These provocative insights, of course, are really just good old-fashioned common sense.  Saying no to a child–what an idea!  This is the stuff of ground-breaking, cover-making wisdom at present.

I’d like to use this piece to offer a few thoughts on the current state of evangelical parenting.  Many of us do focus on developing self-esteem in our children, which has a few positive and many negative effects–good because our children know we love them and are interested in what they do, bad because they can all too easily learn self-centeredness instead of God-centeredness.  That, to say the very least, is a problem, as is the practice of rewarding children for mediocrity and even failure.

But there’s a parallel issue that concerns me about the “parenting style” of many of us today.  It is theological: we love grace.  We so exult in God’s lavish grace–and nothing is more worthy of exulting in, or exalting–that we lose sight of other important biblical-theological concepts.  Like what, you say?  Like the law.  The law does not and cannot save.  Only the gospel can.  But the law is nonetheless of great value to us in forming character, understanding God’s nature, and driving us to the mercy offered us in Christ (see Galatians 3:24).

How does this apply to modern evangelical parenting?  I’m concerned that many evangelicals who prize God’s sovereign goodness as I do are diminishing the importance of rules, morals, and appropriate behavior.  Let’s be clear–I’m not advocating moralism. I don’t want kids to grow up with hard-and-fast ethical boundaries but no grace, no love, no affection.  I guess I’m theologically greedy.  I want both.  I want a home that is driven by and centered in and soaked through with grace.  God-rooted grace should drive the life of a family such that love, not law, is the dominant trait one picks up about a Christian family when one spends time with it.  ”What was it about the Harpers?  They interact with one another in such a loving way.  Why?”  That’s the kind of question people should ask after being around our godly families.

To read the rest, visit the BibleMesh blog, where this piece is posted in full.

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Cross-posted from Owen's personal blog.

Is Disciple a Verb

We were a young church plant, still struggling to map out our DNA, our essentials, the values upon which we wanted to build our arm of the body of Christ. We had our definitive statements on paper, but we were puzzled about how to make them live and breathe. We knew what we felt called to, but living out that calling in real time was proving to be another thing entirely. We felt called to discipleship. To bring together a group of people who intentionally lived life together, encouraging one another’s spiritual growth. We wanted to enjoy Christ together, love other people well, and engage the world around us in a meaningful, life-changing way. We envisioned this type of intentional discipleship happening in small groups of 3 or 4, little cells of people spurring one another on to live the life Jesus called us to live.

We thought it sounded simple enough, but problems arose which clouded this vision and made us all see a little blurry. How do we convince people to engage in this type of intimate discipleship when they have never seen it done? How do we ensure that what goes on within those relationships remains gospel-centered and Jesus-focused? How do we form the groups? How do we incorporate newcomers? How do we encourage these discipleship groups to reach the lost?

We certainly weren’t suffering from a lack of interest. “Disciple” had become a buzz-word in our little church family, especially among people in their 20s. We would often hear questions such as “Are you discipling anyone?” or “Do you know anyone who could disciple me?” floating around in conversations. We rejoiced in the interest in discipleship but continued to struggle with how to make it happen in reality.

Is "Disciple" a Verb?

One summer, we decided to utilize a sermon series to tackle these problems and wrestle them to the mat. After each message, one of our leaders would facilitate a discussion in which anyone could ask a question relating to the topic. We were hoping to provide clarity about our vision of discipleship and what that could look like in our church body. A lot of great questions were asked that summer and thoughtful answers given in response.

One morning, however, a question was asked that stumped the facilitator. The question-asker was actually a friend of ours visiting from out of town. He had been doing a lot of thinking about discipleship himself and was intrigued with our discussion. After listening to questions regarding “discipling” other people he raised his hand and asked the question, “Is ‘disciple’ a verb?”

Silence.

I don’t know whether our facilitator temporarily lost his grasp of English grammar or whether the question honestly didn’t make sense, but the question stumped him. “Is ‘disciple’ a verb?” It was a little cheeky of our friend to ask it that way, really. It might have been more helpful to our discussion if he went ahead and asked the questions behind the question. What he was really getting at was something more like, “How is the word 'disciple' used in the New Testament?  As a noun, indicating a person, or as a verb, indicating an action? Are we using the term correctly? Or are we perhaps misusing it?”

Though our friend’s question wasn’t answered well that morning, it prompted me to do a little thinking and research. I knew what he was getting at. The word “disciple” or mathetes in Greek is a noun and is used in the New Testament as such. It refers to a person. A New Testament disciple is a person who is committed to learning from and following Jesus. But in contemporary church circles, it is popular to use the word as a verb: “So and so is ‘discipling’ me.”

So which is it? A noun or a verb? The question can be answered with grammatical ease. In the New Testament, mathetes is used as a noun: disciple, student, learner, follower. A closely related word, matheteuo, is a verb used several times in the New Testament, such as when Jesus instructs his disciples to go and make disciples (Matthew 28:19).

The action of “making disciples” we have shortened to the term “discipling" - kind of a funny little word that spellcheck continually rejects, but it makes the point. Using “disciple” as a verb indicates the action Jesus commanded when he told us to “make disciples” of all nations. By “discipling” people, we are attempting to obey Jesus by “making disciples.”

The Real Question

But there is a deeper question underlying the issue of grammar. I’m not sure if our friend intended this question or not, but it’s a question I’ve been asking myself. Does the way we use the word “disciple” indicate something about our hearts? About our preferences? Do we prefer the noun of being a disciple or the verb of making disciples?

“Disciple” as a Noun

I can see dangers with an overemphasis either way. If people are more comfortable with “disciple” as a noun, then hopefully they are engaging their own discipleship well. They are seeking after Jesus in the Scriptures, determined to follow him and apply the gift of the gospel to their lives. But if there is no activity of discipleship directed toward others in their lives, I think they’re missing something. They may be taking responsibility for their own discipleship, but not the discipleship of others. They are not obeying Jesus’ command to “make disciples.”

I see evidence of this in our church body. We are a young congregation, both in the age of our church as a whole and in the age of the individuals. To be “old” in our church is to be over the age of 35! The people in this upper age bracket seem to engage their own discipleship well for the most part, but are often unaware that the droves of younger people around them need encouragement. They are more comfortable with being a disciple than making disciples.

“Disciple” as a Verb

But the danger can swing the other way as well.  When people shift the use of “disciple” from a noun to a verb, a new set of issues arises.  It is possible that this group of people is more comfortable with the activity of making disciples than with the state of being a disciple.  They spend their lives investing in their relationships with others, but neglect the most important relationship of all, the one with Jesus himself.

Jonathan Dodson illustrates this distinction well in his recent book Gospel-Centered Discipleship.  Dodson admits that at one point in his spiritual journey, “disciple became more of a verb than a noun, less of an identity and more of an activity.”[1]

He describes that when he was focused on “disciple” as an activity, it was as though he were standing at the top of the stairs of discipleship, looking down on the disciples in his living room. He was comfortable dispensing his knowledge to the eager disciples, but was not willing to come down the stairs and join them on eye-level. In other words, he was more comfortable making disciples than being a disciple.

I see this shift in our church family as well. We are all buzzing around talking about who is discipling who, focusing on the activity of discipleship. But are we as concerned with the importance of being disciples? Are we more interested in seeking a discipler than in seeking Jesus? Are we taking responsibility for our own spiritual growth? Have we forgotten that, regardless of who may or may not be discipling us, we are disciples of Jesus?

The Answer to the Question

So the answer our friend’s question is yes. “Disciple” is a verb. But “disciple” is also a noun. We must live out both senses of the word if we want to do discipleship well. We must take our personal discipleship seriously as well as the discipleship of the other people we’re connected to in the body of Christ. We need to be emphasizing the activity and the state of being of the word “disciple” if we’re to engage the process of discipleship the way Jesus intended.

We don’t have all our questions on discipleship answered in our church, but we’re growing. We’re encouraging the people in our church body both to “own their own spiritual growth” as well as engage in discipleship with other people.  We’re trying to consistently model both how to be a disciple and how to make disciples. That much of our vision, at least, is clear. As for the other blurry problems, well, I guess we need another raised hand after a sermon. Hopefully that next difficult question won’t involve grammar.

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[1] Jonathan Dodson, Gospel-Centered Discipleship (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2012), 16.

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Lindsay Powell Fooshee is married to John, a pastor at Redeemer Community Church and church planter with Acts 29. They are raising 3 great kids in East Tennessee, soaking up the joys of toddlers and teenagers at the same time. Lindsay holds an M.A. in Christian Thought from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary and enjoys teaching and writing about what’s she’s learning. She is passionate about discipleship and blogs regularly about it at Kitchen Stool.

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For more resources on being a disciple and disciple making, check out: Jonathan Dodson's Unbelievable Gospel.

Free articles on disciple-making: The Image Conscious Disciple by Jonathan Dodson, A Story of Gospel Community by Seth McBee, and Discipleship 101: How to Disciple a New Believer by Justin Buzzard.

What is a Missional Community?

This is the question that the Verge Network has been asking a number of leaders on their website, this is the question that many churches around the country and world are asking, and this is the question I deal with on a daily basis as someone who oversees community groups, which we view as gospel communities on mission. It’s a vital question for the church, which is typically seen as a Sunday event and maybe a small group bible study or Sunday school. Somewhere along the way, the common understanding of church became a place to go instead of a people who are going. A place to attend, instead of a people with a message to extend. The gospel was never to be kept inside of a church building, but was meant to define all of a Christian’s life and then lived out in a community that seeks to love and care for others.

The origins of the missional community idea are found in Acts chapter 2 in the scriptures that show a community responding to the good news of Jesus Christ’s death and resurrection by being devoted to God, devoted to one another, and devoted to including their friends and neighbors in the good news. Church history shows us St. Patrick who lived this out in a community that eventually evangelized all of Ireland this way.

So now the church is asking, what happened? How do we return to being a people that extend the message and mercy of Jesus Christ, the good news of a good Savior to the world around us? How does missions become normal and local instead of being seen as only an overseas endeavor?

In comes missional community. The name spells it out, a community of people that live on mission together. But as the Verge Network has proved with their question, every church and leader has their own way of living it out.

Ultimately, a missional community is about principles more than it is about exact practicals. The various definitions and forms that happen all over the country and world all carry the same principles but are practically lived out differently depending on leadership and context.

Those primary principles appear to be:

1. Gospel Identity: Everyone in the world lives defined by a certain identity. For the church & those in missional communities, that identity is found as someone saved by Jesus Christ’s work, not our efforts, and then sent as missionaries into the world. We’re not just blessed by God in Christ, we are also meant to be a blessing to others. We are missionaries because God is a missionary and we get to represent what He is like.
2. Community on Mission: Missional Communities is an acknowledgement that our salvation is not an individual, “me & my God” thing, but we are saved into a family or community that cares for one another and serves others together. When a community receives good news, it shares good news.
3. Gather around Mission: The missional community gathers around a specific evangelistic mission. Whether that’s a specific affinity group that everyone cares for or a geographic area where they live, each community has a specific group of people they want to extend the love of Christ to & serve them with the deeds of Christ. I’ve recently seen a greater emphasis on proximity rather than affinity.
4. Discipleship is the key to sustainability: In the past, churches relied on a singular dynamic leader & in some instances that is still the case, but missional communities focuses on enabling every person to be a missionary & minister (or leader) in serving other people with the gospel of Jesus Christ. Missional communities will only be as missional as their discipleship. Are they creating & enabling more people to be leaders? Are they making it simple & transferable? If not, it won’t last.
5. Multiplication: The goal of a missional community is not to grow large in numbers of people, but to create new expressions of community & compassionate mission. They see as their end, multiplying into many communities and spreading the gracious message of Jesus to as many people as possible.

As I mentioned earlier, various churches and leaders do it differently and summarize it in a variety of ways. It typically focuses on core values as they define their practice.

The Austin Stone has God, Gospel, Mission. Austin City Life, Soma Communities, Kaleo San Diego, and The Crowded House, from England, have formed the GCM Collective to share resources centered around Gospel, Community, and Mission.

3DM, originally from England, has Up, In, Out. Neil Cole says Divine Truth, Nurturing Relationships, Apostolic Mission. JR Woodward lists 5 things. Felicity Dale summarizes it as a multiplying family that shares life together on mission. Christian Community Church in Chicago, which puts on Exponential which is centered around the idea of missional communities this year uses the terms Grow, Connect, Expand.

If I understood what Alan Hirsch was saying half the time, I might be able to summarize it similarly, but his accent entrances me. I know he is saying profound and great things, I just have trouble summarizing it. His latest book, Right Here, Right Now, is fantastic and summarizes the movements of a missional community as Move Out, Move In, Move Alongside, Move From.

The practicals of all of these leaders in this idea vary, but the principles do not. Practicals range from size, house church or megachurch, content, location, discipleship methods, and on and on, but the principles are the necessary components for each individual church and leader to wrestle with and define in their context. The message and principles must be contextualized rather than merely adopting the practicals.

The non-negotiable is that to be a career missionary alongside a community and missional community, or whatever you call it, has become to most effective means for churches to live out this truth to our world.

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Cross-posted from Gentrified.

A Child's Gospel

(Editor’s Note: This is the third article of a three part series entitled Kids in the Family of God. Here is Part One and Part Two.) I don’t think it’s biased to say my 23-1/2 month-old daughter is the cutest child God ever created. (Though she may be rivaled in two weeks when our second kiddo is born.) But coupling that statement with biblical truth, I should rightly say, “She’s the cutest little ball of depravity ever created!” From as early as three months, we knew our daughter was selfish, self-serving, and self-focused. Honestly, how could she be anything else!?

As she’s grown, and as we lovingly discipline her, we’re learning to speak not of good or bad - of “trying hard” and succeeding and failing. Instead, we speak of obedience and authority and discipline. As parents, we try (though we often fail) to reflect the loving-parent-ness of God when we explain to her – whether she can understand or not – that we know what’s best for her, and even if it hurts her feelings, she needs to obey because God put us in her life to reflect him.

By engaging kids, we see brokenness restored, over and over and over.

When we see her move from disobedience to obedience, we see an echo of the gospel. Humanity was created to obey. Our fallen nature pulls us to disobey. Her obedience is common grace as God turns her heart to listen and act.

When we lovingly have those corrective conversations in our community, two things occur: first, we display gospel-focused discipline for other parents and for those who will be parents one day. We learn from other parents in their loving discipline as well. Second, no matter what someone’s family history is, or how they were raised and disciplined, our community experiences together what it means to address the heart in our own disobedience. While we encourage our community not to carry out discipline in front of others, we do have these corrective conversations, and doing so has led to great discussions on our own tendencies, and our need for God to change our own hearts.

Corrective discipline is just one example of seeing brokenness restored in our children. When one child hurts another (intentionally or otherwise), we see forgiveness asked and granted, and a relationship restored. Even thinking on physical restoration, kids seem to get sick, bloody, stubbed, and bonked far more and far easier than grown-ups. But they also seem to bounce back with far more ease than our aged bodies do!

In seeing health restored after sickness, in seeing black and blue toes return to normal, even in seeing teary eyes turn into joyful squeals, we see brokenness restored. In the same way that Jesus’ physical healing pointed toward his spiritual work, all of these little restorations are echoes of the objective reality of God’s restorative work in his creation. Paul explains this in his letter to the Colossians: “For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.” (Colossians 1:19-20).

Raising kids in the family of God allows you to see these things often - in your own children and in others.

Kids’ Need for You - Your Need for God

Most of us are familiar with verses like “I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it” (Luke 18:17) and “Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:4). But when we really stop to think of what these verses mean, we see the gospel echoed in the life of a child.

Think of what a baby is able to do. Nothing. Young children are completely reliant on something outside of themselves: to provide for them, to nourish them, to care for them, to teach them, to do everything for them. Think of an elementary child. They’ve figured out how to walk and feed themselves, but they’re full of questions. They don’t know “this” or “that,” and they turn to someone “greater than themselves” (to use overly-obvious language for the metaphor I’m getting at) for answers. Even the rebellious teenager still needs Mom and Dad far more than they let on, and if the relationship is healthy, even adult children ask their parents for advice.

“Receiving the kingdom… like a little child” speaks of our great need - our inability to receive the kingdom by attaining it, by self-reliance, by our own work, action, and volition. We need something outside ourselves and greater than ourselves to deliver the kingdom to us. The only position we’re able to take before our heavenly Father is “humble… like a child” – full of nothing but a desperate need for God the Spirit to convict us of sin, enact his salvation, and continually apply the truth of our inability to areas of sin, selfishness, and evil. In objective salvation and in ongoing discipleship, children remind us of our need for God. Because whatever it is, without his work in and through us, we can’t do it.

Parents have the blessing of seeing this day in and day out. But as our entire church participates with our children, in communities and during gatherings, everyone can see reflections of our own position before God. Whether providing snacks, rocking to sleep, drying tears, opening a jar, cleaning up a spill, leading a song, saying a prayer, changing a diaper, picking up a toy, protecting against allergies, praying for, or otherwise serving our kids, we’re reminded of our great childlike need as we meet the needs of children.

Breaking idols

This has been alluded to already in this series of posts, but a third way we see the gospel is to realize that raising kids in the family of God reveals our hearts, and reveals our idols. Here are just a few examples:

• Embarrassment by a kid running, or making a noise, in a gathering of the church, might display a “fear of man” idol – you care more than you should, about what “they” think of you and your parenting.
• Annoyance with a child’s comment during a community meeting might display a lack of patience, which might be a control issue and/or selfishness over (in your mind) the “wasted time.”
• Stifling your child’s comments, for fear of what they might say, might be another control issue, as you distrust that God’s sovereign goodness extends even to your child – even if that means God uses your kid’s comment to humble you!
• Many parents don’t want other parents to speak into their family. While some advice-giving is ill-placed, self-sufficiency and pride is revealed in disregarding, or disallowing, godly counsel and wisdom from folks who are removed from your family’s daily patterns and rhythms. (One of the greatest parenting rebukes we’ve received was from a college guy – I despised him for a moment “what right do you have…” but he was removed enough to see objectively what I couldn’t!)
• Harsh words that slip out toward your child might reveal your lacking understanding of grace or at least your lack of displaying that grace.

What is revealed about how you treat your kids and the kids in your community?

I close this posts with wise words from Tim Chester:

"In You Can Change [Crossway, 2010] I identify four truths about God (the four Gs as some have characterized them):

• God is great – so we don’t have to be in control
• God is glorious – so we don’t have to fear others
• God is good – so we don’t have to look elsewhere
• God is gracious – so we don’t have to prove ourselves

“All our sinful behavioural and negative emotions stem from a failure at a functional level to believe one of these truths. So they’re a great diagnostic tool – both for ourselves and when pastoring others. But more importantly, they offer hope. Learning to have faith in these areas offers the real prospect of change through faith. It means we are speaking good news to people and that’s what we’re after – gospel-centred change. Legalism says, ‘You must not . . .’ The gospel says, ‘You need not . . . because God is bigger and better than sin.’"

Beyond biblical principles to follow and beyond experiential practice, the heart of raising kids in the family of God is that – in parents, in community members, in attendees of the church gathering, and in anyone else who participates in the corporate life – God uses children as one very-easy-to-see-way to reveal our idols. Through children, he shines a light on our selfishness. Through children, he shows our need for grace when we fail our children and other parents. And through children, he consistently points us toward the unquenchable need to “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure” (Philippians 2:12-13).

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Ben Connelly lives in Fort Worth, TX, with his wife and daughter (with another on the way this fall). He started The City Church in 2010 and lives on mission by teaching public speaking at TCU. Ben sits on the board of a few city-focused organizations, trains occasionally across the country, and writes at benconnelly.net. Twitter: @connellyben

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Parents, for more resources on discipling your children at home, check out Winfield Bevin's Beginner's Guide to Family Worship.

Managing Social Media (before it manages you)

It’s no secret that I’m a fan of social media. I’m convinced it’s an incredible tool to expand your reach, advance gospel causes, sharpen your communication skills, and on top of all that, it’s fun. However, social media also has the potential to consume your time, kill actual relationships with real people and divert your attention from things that matter. So, from the perspective of a pastor, how can we redeem social media? How can we manage it well, so that it doesn’t manage us? While this is by no means an exhaustive list, here are a four principles that I’ve thought through recently and have found to be helpful.

1. Get rid of notifications. One of the benefits of social media is the immediacy of it. News travels faster, and sooner, via Twitter than other method ever known. With that said, immediacy can often translate into an unnecessary sense of urgency. If you are not careful you will find yourself thinking that you have to always be available, and always be ready with a reply. The truth is, most of what you see/reply to can wait. To make this happen, I eliminated the notification options from Facebook and Twitter. I still have both of them on my phone, I just don’t get emails or notifications anymore. This helps me to respond when I have time, not when everyone else responds to me.

2. Get away, while not getting away. I have found that having occasional periods where I get away from social media is good for my soul. Rest is always helpful, and resting from social media is no different. I want to be certain that I control my social media habits, not vice versa. Now, those who know me might be surprised to hear that because it often seems like I’m always online. This is where good social media tools come in handy. Through the benefit of software like Tweetdeck or Hootsuite I am able to schedule updates, and I regularly use this feature. I will take a day’s break from social media, and schedule a number of updates to post to Twitter &/or Facebook while I’m gone. This allows me to consistently update gospel coaching information, which I think is one of the great values of social media, while personally getting away from it all. So get away, while not getting away.

3. Real people come first. By this I don’t mean that people online are not real people. I do, however, think that face to face interaction with people will always trump every other method of communication. So, when face to face, dump the social media. No checking up on your status, looking for replies or “likes”, no updating the latest bit of news, while you are conversing with others. I’ll admit, I often fail at this. Social media should always be a means to enhancing and/or fostering relationships with people that are physically present around you. Don’t sacrifice that, then, for the sake of your online presence.

4. Embrace the dichotomy. Classic media sources were all about “the news”. They were professional, precise and rarely revealed anyone’s personal lives, unless that is, the personal life was newsworthy. Social media, however, is seen by many people as exactly the opposite. They view it as narcissism run amok. It is the pinnacle of arrogance, they might say, to assume that others are interested, or should be interested, in the mundane realities of your everyday life. The truth is, however, that social media stands somewhere between the two maintaining a unique dichotomy. It is personal, no doubt, but it’s also more effective as a news vehicle than any sort of classic model. With that said, embrace both realities. I love social media because it allows me to engage people in my church on a much more consistent basis than I ever would apart from it. I also love it because I am able to extend the pulpit throughout the week as I attempt to provide gospel coaching to the people God has given me to shepherd. However, it’s also a blast because I get to share with people how amazing my wife is, how incredible my daughters are and how much fun my favorite sports teams are to root for. The truth is, this side of me might often be one that many in my church would never see. If not for this helpful medium the pastor would continue to be viewed as this unapproachable, truth teller, that exists in a different world than the average guy. Social media helps them to learn otherwise. It shows that I’m a bit of a mess, relying on grace like they are. That is a huge benefit in the corner of social media. So, embrace the dichotomy. Recognize it for what it is, and use it as much as possible, within that tension. You and the people you lead will be better for it.

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Cross-posted from Micah's personal blog.

On the Trinity, Gospel, Local Church, and More

What is the value of church history?  I attempt to answer this very important question here in a video interview with Christianity.com conducted at the 2011 national conference of The Gospel Coalition.  I reference the doctrine of the Trinity–currently a hot-button issue due to the matter of modalism raised in light of the Elephant Room video series–to show that while historical theology does not create truth, it certainly allows Christians to put together biblical insights, to systematize doctrine for the flourishing of God’s people and the defense of God’s name.  (That’s Athanasius, Trinitarian theologian par excellence, to the root, by the way.) You can watch the featured Christianity.com video here.  Here is a list of other videos that I did for this organization, which is committed to putting out rich doctrinal content to aid Christians in their walk with Christ.  I’m thankful for the chance to have made a small contribution and hope that these videos stimulate thought and learning.  They were very fun to do.  Most are between 2-3 minutes.

Here are the topics I talked about in bite-size pieces:

• How should we interpret 1 Timothy 2:12?
• What was God doing before He created the world? (fun question!)
• What is the gospel?
• What church history books should every Christian read? (Marsden!)
• Why should every Christian belong to a local church?
• Who are the Puritans and what can we learn from them? (bunch of kill-joys)
• Why should a busy pastor study theology?

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Cross-posted from Owen's personal blog.