Today you will be with me in Paradise

One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” – Luke 23:39-43

On the cross, Jesus reveals a huge truth when he invites the criminal hanging next to him into Paradise.“And [the thief] said, ‘Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.’ And [Jesus] said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise’” (v. 43). This man didn’t know religious jargon, but his confession is raw and authentic. He speaks in defense of Jesus, saying that he is innocent of the punishment he and the other criminal deserve. Yet, Jesus still hangs in the same place they do. This confession is a beautiful presentation of the gospel. Spoken by a man unworthy of the inheritance of Christ. His offense had to be among the worst if his punishment was death on a cross. The severe contrast of the two criminals is nothing but a posture of heart and the grace of God. Their reputation, infliction, and condemnation is the same, but Christ changed one man’s eternity.

Have you ever prayed for terrorists? Do you know drug addicts? Have you watched cyclic homelessness? What about pimps and prostitutes? A subtle lie has infected evangelicalism. It’s that someone can be too far gone to be saved. I realized this when I had a friend pray for a family member of mine. I sat in awe as she passionately pleaded for God’s mercy to be lavished upon my loved one. Her faith invigorated my own, even though at the time my hope for my family member’s salvation was extinguished. Honestly, I had stopped praying for them altogether. The infection of this lie dulls our hearts and minds. We choose to reside in the welfare of apathy rather than the dangerousness of compassion. The root is nothing more than hope deferred and rotted.

I grew up hearing that sin can’t be ranked because God sees it all as rebellion. It seemed simple. But a murderer can not simply be equated with a liar. It doesn’t seem natural, right, or moral to equate all injustice. However, no matter our sin when God considers those who believe in Jesus, the Father see us as the blameless Jesus. That truth that defeats the lie. If everyone who believes is seen in Christ, then we should boldly pray for the worst sinners. Because if they believe, they too will be justified by the blood of Jesus and seen as righteous in him. There is no boundary of too far and no unforgivable sin. We are blameless because of the Son before the Father. This justification is our victory and invites us into the very presence of God. We bear no weight of sin. Victory is ours and it’s for all. We can pray for the biggest sinner hoping to hear, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

Nothing Outweighs Grace

Christ resurrects hope when we least expect it, when we least deserve it, and even when we seem to be out of time. Every story of the gospel’s work in the life of a sinner may not be told through a lifetime. It may be told in a short few minutes, or even seconds. The thief on the cross is delivered within moments of his death. He confessed with his mouth and believed in his heart (Rom 10:9). Therefore, he was justified and saved. But Jesus etched his story forever in the Gospels. This man may have wasted away his life. He may have killed and stolen and abused people. At the end of the day, he was rescued from the captivity of his sin. And in the last seconds of their lives, Jesus resurrected hope for this hope and so for all sinners. If God can save this man, then none of us are beyond hope. This man may not have had a lifetime to share the Good News of Christ, but his testimony lives.

When my friend prayed for the salvation and sanctification of my family member, it felt as though she showed me an empty well within my heart, but as she prayed, she began pouring water into the well until it was overflowing. Her prayer filled me with a hope that I had lost, but even more, she led me to the throne so that I could pray myself. God rescues us when we admit our insufficiency, just like the criminal hanging next to Jesus. “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” (Rom. 15:13). The simple part of salvation is that we don’t do it. God alone through Christ alone uses the Holy Spirit alone to change the hearts of people. No sin outweighs the grace of God. My advice is this, don’t be afraid to ask for prayer. Even more, ask someone to pray over you and let the hope in their voice and the power of the Spirit remind you of the truth. Also, if you know someone who is lost or hurting, approach them and offer a prayer. The timing of God is not accidental, but absolutely providential. Trust and believe that Christ’s gift of salvation can be offered to anyone.

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Chelsea Vaughn (@chelsea725) has served a ministry she helped start in the DFW Metroplex since she graduated from college. She received her undergraduate degree at Dallas Baptist University in Communication Theory. She does freelance writing, editing, and speaking for various organizations and non-profits. She hopes to spend her life using her gift for communication to reach culture and communities with the love of Jesus.

Diligently Teaching Our Children to Spot Counterfeit Gods

I have a friend who works in the banking industry, and as he was training I was fascinated by a particular story that he shared with me. He was sitting in the training room and his manager began to lay twenty-dollar bills on the table. As he laid them down he looked up and asked, "Which one is a counterfeit?" My friend carefully examined the bills and chose one. He chose the wrong one. The manager picked the bills up and began to teach him how to spot the counterfeit bill. This happened everyday until he could spot the counterfeit within seconds. Likewise, we must train our children so well that they can spot the counterfeit gods that our society invites them to serve within seconds. These brazen invitations to serve counterfeit gods are the reason our children need to be trained just like my friend who works in the bank.

Teach Them Diligently

These are the words of God in Deuteronomy 6:

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. –Deuteronomy 6:4-9

When we think about raising children, these words from God come quickly to mind. God commands believing parents to raise their children diligently.

"You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."

This training is a lifestyle and you must teach it to your children.

We must answer the question, "Why?" Why do we need to be teaching this to our children? It is quite simple—because as believing parents, we are the primary means of discipleship in our family. God tells us to teach our children diligently and that is exactly what we must do. Besides, as you may have figured out, this command has many practical implications for your life and your children.

God is very clear in why he commands his people to train their children up in the way they should go; because when they go into the land that he has promised them, there will be counterfeit gods and they will be tempted to go and worship them! Well, we know that the only God that must be worshipped is the Lord and he is a jealous God for his people (Deut. 6:15). He demands we worship him and him alone (Exod. 20:1-6).

My mind immediately goes to Galatians as Paul warns those believers not to turn to a "different gospel" (Gal. 1:6). Well as frankly as I can put it, believers are finding their children turning to a different gospel and falling into the temptations from its counterfeit gods because we have not followed the command from Deuteronomy 6 to diligently teach our children.

More times than not I hear parents say, "I'm just going to let my child be a child. They don't need to worry about things like homosexuality or abortion until they're out of college."

This response is oblivious at best because everything that surrounds them in life pushes them to counterfeit gods and their “gospels.” Our children are pushed by the media to care more about Brady's deflated footballs than the devaluation of human life. Their schools teach them that it's foolish to believe in God and that only science should be trusted . I could go on and on about how our world is telling our kids to run far away from God and into a different gospel of false love and acceptance—where anything goes and God does not exist.

Three Common Counterfeit Gods

As a youth director, I regularly encounter these three counterfeit gods: the counterfeit god of choice, the counterfeit god of sex, and the counterfeit god of acceptance.

First, our children are being proselytized by the god of choice. This is the idea that they are entitled to live life the way they see fit. This counterfeit god’s gospel proclaims that how they and others choose to live their lives is no one's business. There is no absolute truth; there are no rules for life only whatever they see as right. Jesus rebukes this counterfeit god by saying, "Sanctify them in the truth, your word is truth" (Jn. 17:17). The Word of God is the only absolute truth. The Word of God tells us what is right and points us to Jesus. Many today see the Word of God as binding them, but the Psalmist David exclaims that the Word of God makes the believer's paths wide (Ps. 119). The Word of God is where our children will find their perfect joy and peace in this life, and ultimately, Christ prays that his people will be sanctified by it.

Second, our children are being proselytized by the god of sex. We live in a culture that glorifies sex without consequence. The television shows, the movies, and the music that surrounds our children shove a sexual lifestyle that carries no future weight in their lives. Our children see this bogus glorified lifestyle and they begin to desire to live their lives this way. This counterfeit gods gospels proclaims that they know what true love is and a rampant pornography industry says they know what sex is designed to be. Our children fall into this trap time and time again. The gospel counters this counterfeit god by reminding believers that their bodies are temples of God and that sexual immorality should not be named among believers (Eph. 5:3). Jesus is clear in his definition of marriage and beyond that definition is against the will of God (Mark 10:6-9).

Last, our children are being proselytized by the god of acceptance. As our children fall into the lies of counterfeit gods, so do their friends. As their friends begin to believe a different gospel, they proclaim the gospel of acceptance and urge our children to follow suit in esteeming the opinion and acceptance of man above the one true God. What does the true gospel proclaim? Our reward for faithfulness is in heaven (Matt. 5:12). Our children must live a life that is always ready for eternal life and able to say, "Come Lord Jesus, Come quickly, Amen" (Rev. 22).

So, as parent's, how do we disciple our children, and stop this constant sliding into a lifestyle that is led astray by these counterfeit gods? We must teach our children that the only way to discern what is important in our world is to look at what is important to Jesus. We must teach our children how to spot counterfeit gods and different gospels.

And this must start at the home! Parents must diligently disciple their children in the faith once delivered. Parents, you spend the most time with your children and you must be intentional about raising them up in the faith so that they will not be like the house built upon the sand that falls when faced with the great storms of life (Matt. 7:24-27).

Two Means to Recognize the Counterfeits

I think we have two primary means to disciple our children:

1. Go to Church Regularly as a Family

I do not know of a better place to have your children other than in the church—where we are called to worship in the very presence of God. They will be accustomed to hearing the Word preached, the sacraments being practiced, and prayers being made. These aspects of worship are the primary ways by which our God pours out grace upon his people. Parents, why would we not want our children in church? For children to see their parents worshipping God, to see them fellowship with other believers, and to see them serve the church faithfully—there is no greater training that you can give!

If you worship God together in the church fifty times every year over the course of your child’s life, they will have heard and seen the gospel over 600 times. Don’t miss these opportunities. Families who worship in the church together help to counter the current trend in our culture because when you know what true worship looks like on Sunday, you can truly worship rightly on Monday through Saturday.

2. Worship with Your Family at Home.

Because family worship is often neglected in the church, it is a practice I’m intentional about promoting to the children and families I help shepherd. How can we obey Deuteronomy 6 without setting aside time for family worship? If your children see God being glorified in the home, if they see their parents living out their worship that takes place on Sunday morning through the rest of the week, and if they feel encouraged to live their life for Christ, they will be more prepared to boldly stand for their faith outside of the home when the time comes.

Parents, it is not good enough to live for Christ on Sunday morning and not the rest of the week because your child will grow up and do exactly the same thing. These two practices go hand-in-hand. Our worship on Sunday flows into our family worship throughout the week. We worship in our churches, the benediction is proclaimed and the service ends, and now we are sent out into the world. However, discipleship cannot end there. We must worship in our homes so that as the counterfeit gods of our culture assault our children they instinctually recall what we have diligently taught them in our churches and in our homes.

Through worshipping together on Sunday mornings and worshipping throughout the week in the home, our children will have been in the presence of God so much that they know exactly how these counterfeit gods look and their response will be to flee from them. Parents, disciple your children. Make going to church a habit and worship regularly together, in your church and in your home. Teach your children diligently. It's vital for your family and our culture. Now the time to take Deuteronomy 6 seriously.

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Matthew D. Adams is the Director of Youth and Family Ministries at First Presbyterian Church, PCA in Dillon, SC. He is currently a Master's of Divinity student at Erskine Theological Seminary in Columbia, SC. He lives in a small town by the name of Hamer, SC and is married to Beth. Follow him on twitter @Matt_Adams90.

Are Children a Barrier or Blessing for Missional Communities?

Missional Communities are a beautiful mess, especially when they have kids! I remember the first Missional Community (MC) that my wife and I led. We had a diverse group consisting of college students, singles, married couples, and lots and lots of kids. I remember one time we took a photo in our backyard. It looked like we were running a pre-k program every Thursday night. Not only were my wife and I trying to plan and prepare for our community's meeting every week, but we also found that we needed to dedicate and intentionally build in planning time for the children. Week in and week out, we'd have 10-14 kiddos at our house. We quickly learned that it was a beautiful mess—one that called us to steward well the responsibility of having children in our groups. In talking with others leading or participating in MCs, one thing has become apparent—trying to meaningfully incorporate children into the life of a community on mission is relatively new territory. I've seen the church build momentum with this in large corporate gatherings, which is a beautiful evidence of grace upon the church. However, the church must shift focus and begin building similar systems and rhythms for the children in our groups. For most missional communities, the extent that children participate is coming with their parents, usually destroying the host's home, enjoying unlimited lasagna and cookies, watching a movie, and then leaving at the end of the night. For children under 3, that's not bad. We want them to enjoy their time. That doesn’t mean they can’t digest basic ideas, songs, and stories about Jesus, but we shouldn’t drowned toddlers under 3 with theology.

My focus, in this article, is missional communities with children 3 and up, especially those with children 6 and up. Why? Because developmentally, children between 3-6 can start learning basic concepts building to more advanced concepts as they approach 6. They're learning to learn and are able to do things like sit for longer periods of time and be attentive to instruction. Kiddos 6 and above have clearly learned the "learning to learn" skills to be successful with just that, learning! One final comment on developmental appropriateness; not all children develop at a typical rate. There are lots of kiddos in each and every community that require special attention and have specific learning styles. That said, keep in mind that we'll have to be flexible as we plan for the group at large, knowing that we'll have to adjust instruction and teaching for certain learners that are wonderfully different.

Intentional Incorporation

What would it look like to intentionally incorporate children? First, we must instruct and teach them at their level each and every week—whether you're taking the concepts that the whole MC is learning and making it developmentally appropriate for children, or whether your lesson planning new concepts altogether. The idea is that we're intentional and we're planning. In addition to planning lessons and units of teaching, we want to engage the kiddos in community by encouraging the sharing of their hearts, the confessing of their sins, and by sharing the good news of the rich grace that more than covers their iniquities. If we do one thing well with our kiddos, let's teach them the concept of grace. Let's teach them how sweet it is and the cost that was paid for their sins. Not only will our children grow in grace, but also they'll learn to lead well in a generation that truly needs it. You want revival beyond us and our generation, focus on the children in your groups.

Luke 18 helps us understand why we should do this well. In Luke 18, Jesus encounters a group of children. Essentially, we know that Jesus calls the children to him yet let's look deeper. I'm going to make an assumption in examining this passage as to Jesus' heart in calling the children to himself. As opposed to saying, "Hold up kids! I'm not sure you know this, but I'm Jesus, you know, the Son of God. I'm busy preaching and teaching. You'll have to come back later." Was that Jesus' heart and attitude towards the kiddos? Did he take himself so seriously that he sent the children on their way? Absolutely not! He calls them to himself. That's an example for us leaders. You might be thinking “I’ve never turned away the kiddos during MC,” yet in your heart, I’m sure you’ve felt like they're getting in the way. You've probably felt like putting them in a room for the sake of peace and quiet. The heart there is what we're aiming for and where I want to focus. As opposed to viewing children as a barrier, let's view them as a blessingYes, it's chaotic. Yes, it can drive us crazy. But, despite that, let's model graciousness in our families and groups towards our children. After all, what must God think of our messy lives? The Father looks down and extends grace, rather than becoming irritated with us.

Deuteronomy 11:18-20 also supports this rationale. Moses gives a clear command for us to teach "these things" to our children. When? Where? While we're sitting at home, walking along the way, and in every part of our life. It's very casual, yet important. This passage gives the sense that teaching our children is to be done on a regular basis, both informally and continually. If we're called to do this so informally in our homes, that's all the more reason to better steward a structured time like MC.

Practical Recommendations

So how should we do this well from a practical standpoint? I want to be pragmatic and practical in this section. How are we going to do this well? Remember, these are recommendations and should be modified to fit the context of your MC and its participants.

• Ask for volunteers. Volunteers can make the MC more life giving for the families participating. I'd encourage the MC to look for an individual within the church that can serve each week. We had a faithful servant in our missional community that loved our kiddos. We loved her and demonstrated our appreciation for her in tangible ways. She loved when we gifted her the ESV Study Bible. It was a little gesture to show our appreciation of her commitment. A good volunteer can make the group more engaging for the parents participating.
• Provide Direction. A good way the church can serve these volunteers is by providing support in the way of lesson planning and strategic vision and direction. This can be done by a paid Children’s Director or by partners in the church that are gifted in working with children. Remember, it takes a village.
• Plan. Plan ahead for the kiddos that are there. Putting them into informal "clusters" will help you keep the expectations appropriate for each respective grouping.
• Kiddos under 3 need to have a good time. Cookies, cake, toys they like, and other special activities (Play-Doh, bubbles, etc.) will keep them engaged and loving the weekly rhythm of MC, which is worth its weight in gold. Parents will tell you—they're thrilled if they can meaningfully participate in MC because their under 3 kiddo enjoys being there. Gold I tell you.
• Kiddos between 3-6 can start to learn Scripture and enjoy the stories found in a good kids Bible. We recommend the The Jesus Storybook Bible. We love that the main Hero in the Story is Jesus and that's what we'd love for kiddos in this cluster to start learning. Jesus is the main character and all of Scripture points to him. It's our job to model a love of Scripture and an excitement for what’s found within the Book.
• Kiddos 6 and up may also like the Action Bible. It's with this group that you can expect more (sharing their hearts, confessing sin, understanding and applying grace, praying for one another, etc.)
• Look for leaders within this cluster. My sons are 6 and 8, and by God's grace, they're good leaders. They have 2 little sisters so they've had lots of opportunities to practice leading as tough and tender boys. I’ve also met lots of little girls that are firm and enjoy “mothering.” These kiddos will be the best helpers in the group; they can support the volunteer in reading to the younger children or playing games with them. This also gives us the opportunity to build them up as they embrace responsibility. Find leaders and equip them just like you would their parents!
• Have a rough schedule planned out but be flexible. The most successful leaders are agile, especially when you’re working with children.
• Work Together. Make sure there's gracious collaboration between the volunteers and family. The volunteer is not going to be perfect nor will they know the children as well as the parents. There's a learning curve involved but collaboration is important.
• Pray with and for all the children regularly—it's vital!

What Works for Your MC

In light of the different directions you could take, I’d encourage you to prayerfully consider what might work for your MC. Ultimately, we want our children in the church to grow up knowing what it looks and feels like to have authentic community. If we can accomplish this, the ripple will be far beyond anything we can ever measure. Lives will be changed and the gospel will move forward. We must take and win this territory. It's untouched and ripe for the picking. Jesus says in Luke 10 that the harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Let's cultivate what's needed from an early age to raise up laborers for the kingdom of God. They're right there in our groups, you know, the ones reaching for the cookies.

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Rob Fattal serves as CEO and BCBA in high-touch boutique firms providing educational services to children. He started his career as a credentialed teacher and served in both the public school system and at the university level. He and his wife have 4 kiddos of their own and have led and coached MCs and MC leaders. Ultimately, they love the church and hope to serve it well.

Worship in the Waiting

This is  hard to write. It's hard because I feel myself immediately pulled in two directions: discuss worship itself—like how we're all innately wired to worship and how we so frequently direct our worship to creation rather than the Creator—or instead just share some of my personal, sometimes painful, journey with worship. Today I'll choose the latter. God has used one of the things I hate most to teach me about true worship.

Waiting.

I've always hated waiting. My dad is one of those people who takes joy in finding a way around lines, discovering unused shortcuts or somehow increasing the efficiency of things. Both of my parents were brought up under the adage, "Time is money," so from an early age I gathered that waiting is a vice, not a virtue. Subtle "truths" that accompanied this mindset were that I shouldn't have to wait on things, and that it's up to me to change my circumstances to avoid waiting.

I happily embraced those “truths” and carried them with me into my adult life. I relied on myself and believed I was in control. I mistook God’s blessings in my life for evidence to support my own perceived self-sufficiency. But my merciful Father lovingly did what I needed most . . . he opened my eyes to the lies I was living in and wrecked me.

It didn't come at once like a tidal wave. Instead, it was a steady rain—with moments of breaking sunlight and others of blinding torrents.

I've had to wait in the seemingly mundane things like sitting in traffic or waiting for a delayed plane with three kids in tow or even just trying to carry laundry baskets upstairs behind an 18 month old. I’ve also experienced significant, desperate seasons of waiting. No matter what the circumstance, waiting always exposes my heart and desire for control and my true lack of it.

For Andrew and I the steadiest downpour in this season of waiting has come in the form of financial dependence.

God first began to reshape my view of money when he prompted me to quit my first full-time job out of grad school. I had placed so much value on my title and found so much of my self-worth in my accomplishments! God was tenderly peeling that away.

I worried about how we would pay our bills, but underneath that worry was dread. It scared me to death to let go of the control I thought I held. Could I really just depend on God? Wasn’t there a lot I should do to make things happen?

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. —Psalm 37:7

God exposed my wicked heart and unhealthy thinking about money. I used to turn to it for comfort. I believed we needed it to be okay. I believed we were more valuable if we could earn a lot of it. I was embarrassed when we didn’t have a lot of it. I was not generous with it. I looked to Jesus for more of it, focusing on what I wanted from his hand, instead of looking at his face and falling down in worship of him. So what did this Just, Holy, Righteous Creator of the universe do in response to my clear idolatry? He died for me. He took off my filthy, tattered, adulterous clothes and covered me in his robes of righteousness!

We saw the Lord provide in innumerable ways. I got to taste and see that he is good and that he keeps his promises. More of me was graciously being replaced by more of Jesus. It was God's mercy that allowed us to have to rely on him for our daily bread. All too often I returned again to my anemic self-reliance . . . only to be mercifully reminded of the riches of the glorious feast found in Jesus!

I slowly adapted to my new role and loved being home with little Eli. Then we found out he would be a big brother! We sat excitedly in the doctor's office, waiting to show Eli his baby brother or sister on the monitor screen. But they couldn't find a heart beat. We saw the tiny baby there, still and silent, and everything inside me screamed for control. We waited and prayed, but the next ultrasound confirmed it.

Miscarriage.

No control.

I went home to await the inevitable, carrying both a toddler and palpable grief.We were terrified the day it happened. I focused on the physical pain and questions about whether to go to the hospital, but what frightened me the most was the sense that something else was dying. I was dying to myself and my facade of control.

In that moment I felt at peace—unexplainable, permeating peace. Right in the middle of that torrential downpour. I was never alone and God was stirring worship in me, even in our suffering, by displaying his faithfulness and reminding me of his sovereignty.

We processed the loss of our child with time, talking, and lots of the gospel.

Life never stopped during our grief, though at times it seemed like it should. In the four years since then, we have welcomed two new babies. We’ve experienced new challenges. And we have many more examples of God asking us to wait. We’ve learned to see how loving “No” or “Not yet” can be.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. —Psalm 37:5

He has led me further out on the waters than I ever imagined, showing me each step of the way that he is good, that he can be trusted, and that he is for his own glory and my ultimate joy. As God mercifully sanctifies me, I have a deeper understanding of his character that helps me see just how finite and completely dependent I truly am. Knowing God in this way stirs up real worship.

Whatever it is that he is calling you to wait on—a job, a spouse, a child, your next electric bill—turn to Jesus and find much deeper fulfillment than those things alone could ever bring!

I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. —Psalm 34:3-5

I can praise God for that little life that we lost and how he used it to increase my dependence on him, bringing me greater degrees of freedom. I can thank him for the pink disconnection notices and overdue bills, because he was showing me that I was running to the wrong things for peace and protection. God has been freeing me from fear. He has lovingly called me out from under the broken, hole-riddled umbrella of self-sufficiency I had been cowering under, to stand, face toward the sky, arms out, worshiping through the downpour.

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Myra Dempsey lives in the Columbus, Ohio area with her husband, Andrew, and their 3 children, Eli (5), Esther (3) and Gideon (1). Myra works part-time as a Licensed Professional Counselor and School Psychology Assistant.  She blogs at dependentongrace.com, contributes to the blog for her home church, at vineyardgrace.org, and has been blessed to be the keynote speaker at the iAm conference in Powell, Ohio, an event for teen girls. She loves reading, writing, and talking about God’s glorious grace!

Adapted from dependentongrace.com.

4 Simple Ways Fred Elliot Discipled His Children

Editor: In our Family History Series we are seeking to understand how Christians of the past have pursued making disciples. We want to connect the church’s current efforts to make, mature and multiply disciples to its historical roots as well as encourage the church to learn from her rich past. This is the first in our series.

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“Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth.” –Psalm 127:4

Fred Elliot isn’t a name I’ve heard thrown around . . . well ever. Despite being mentored by Harry Ironside, his legacy is largely unknown in our present day. However, his son, Jim Elliot, is perhaps the most well known missionary of the 20^th century. Because the saying is true that disciples aren’t born they’re made, it is difficult to understate the influence Fred had on Jim’s spiritual formation. Here are just four examples:

1. Authentically Living Coram Deo

Interestingly enough, Fred Elliot may or may not even have been able to define the term “Coram Deo,” a Latin term, meaning to live in the presence (literally “face”) of God, but all the same he lived it out. And this had a profound impact on the young Jim Elliot. Prior to marrying Elisabeth he wrote to her of his father:

“Betty, I blush to think of things I have said, as if I knew something about what Scripture teaches. I know nothing. My father’s religion is of a sort which I have seen nowhere else. His theology is wholly undeveloped, but so real and practical a thing that it shatters every ‘system’ of doctrine I have seen. He cannot define theism, but he knows God.”1

Jim was often viewed with suspicion by other students at Wheaton College for taking God’s Word at face value and living in obedience to a simple and literal interpretation of Scripture. A skeptic of human attempts to systematize and categorize biblical truth, Jim took the second part of 2 Timothy 2:9 which states, “the word of God is not bound,” to mean that God and his revelation in Scripture could never be contained by human classifications.

Too often we give the impression that assent to accurate theological teaching is indispensable to salvation. Don’t misunderstand me, while salvation is more than just “right belief” it is certainly not less. But believing “rightly” is not the same as “walking closely” (cf. 1 Jn. 2:3). Fred’s relationship with Christ left a profound impact on the young Jim not because he possessed a tidy, buttoned-up orthodoxy, but because he humbly submitted to the living God and aimed to walk closely with him. The Savior’s words sufficiently warn us of the danger of placing one’s study of God’s Word above one’s submission to the Word Made Flesh: “You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; and it is they that bear witness about me, yet you refuse to come to me that you may have life” (Jn. 5:39-40). We must take care not to stuff our heads so full of content of Christ that our hearts lack contact with Christ.

It doesn’t take long for a young mind to come up with a theological question that stumps even the most well read of Christian fathers. Don’t lose heart, dad, let God’s grace melt your pride. Seek his face, live authentically in front of it, and teach your children out of the overflow of that relationship. A simple faith lived out sincerely in front of your children will likely leave a stronger impression than a complex theology devoid of an intimate relationship with the Savior.

2. Intentional Time Spent with His Children

Additionally, Fred carved time out of his schedule to spend with the young Jim Elliot and this too left a lasting impression on him. He wrote on his nineteenth birthday:

“My arrival at this point is not of my own efforts […] but by the quiet, unfelt guidance of a faithful mother and a father-preacher who has not spent so much time rearing other people’s children that he hasn’t had time for his own.”2

Anyone who’s ever tried to serve in any meaningful capacity in ministry knows just how demanding it can be. The to-do-list is never done. The temptation to sacrifice your own family for the sake of another family who is in need of pastoral help and discipleship is always present. Even the time with our families that we guard could potentially be interrupted by phone calls and emails if we are not careful. Even before the cell phone and email, pastors were neglecting their own families enough to warrant Jim mentioning it in his journal.

What measures do you take to guard time with your children? Whether you’re in vocational ministry, banking, accounting, medicine, law, or any other profession, what time do you make “sacred” for your family?

There will always be another email; there will always be something on the to-do-list that still needs to be done. Our children, on the other hand, will remember if dad took time to read to them, pray with them, and listen to them. Conversely, if our “quality time” consists of being physically present, but mentally engaged in answering emails on our phones, our sons and daughters will remember that as well.

3. Praying For His Children

Third, Fred Elliot was a man who prayed both with and for his children. “The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much,”3 he writes in one journal entry, going on to attribute his own affection of Christ to the prayers of his own father. Elsewhere he writes to Fred: “Nothing has had a more powerful influence on this life of mine than your prayers […] thank God you took the time—the value of such is inestimable.”4

He didn’t mince words. The single most effective action Fred took in training his son to follow Christ was praying for him. This shouldn’t be surprising when Christ himself, the only perfect person to ever walk this earth, models a life of unceasing prayer for us. Can we really expect to be effective in any of our attempts to make disciples out of our children if we aren’t constantly stopping to pray with and for them?

I know it’s not super flashy to say, “praying for your kids is important.” And then offer that as the most effective way of discipling them. We all prefer 15 new and improved methods of raising children that love Christ, but the simple fact is that God is a person to be related to and not a set of principles to be assented to. While it sounds so simple and dated to say, it does not mean it isn’t true or that it’s easy. Spending time with God and with our kids, praying to him, for them, and with them (as the Bible so intuitively outlines) is likely to pay off better dividends than jumping at the latest trending parenting method that will be forgotten in six months.

So, dad, live in the face of your God and invite your children to accompany you. It’s easiest to introduce them to the living God when you spend a lot of time living in his presence and praying to him.

4. Making The Gospel the Main Thing

Finally, Fred Elliot sought “to show [his children] the glory of Christ above all else, striving always to avoid legalisms or a list of ‘don’ts.’”5 What else could be more important than this?

I only had to wait nine months before my son, Knox, started walking. Then I quickly found myself saying the word “no” more than any other word. Not surprisingly, he wanted to do everything I told him not to. Why is it the fallen human race is so quick to point out everything that shouldn’t be instead of all the great things that are? The Christian life is nothing less than chasing after the glorious risen Christ. Yet, we all too easily can reduce it to a list of things to avoid or define ourselves by the things we are against.

We do well to follow Fred’s lead. Rather than put a spotlight on all the things that are lesser than Christ and discuss their inferiority, we simply exalt him and give him his due praise and our children will hopefully decide on their own that nothing else on this earth is worth their time.

Christ’s defeat of sin and death is proclaimed as Good News. If we continue to proclaim it as such to our children and show them why it is Good News, perhaps they will follow in our footsteps and live their own lives Coram Deo, investing in their children, and praying for the next generation. None of us will be perfect fathers, but, by God’s grace, we can be purposeful fathersand maybe some of our own sons will shake the gates of hell much like Jim Elliot did.

1 Elliot, Shadow of the Almighty, p. 90

2 Ibid. p. 39

3 Ibid. p. 32

4 Ibid. p. 42

5 Ibid. p. 25

—

Sean Nolan (B.S. and M.A., Summit University) is the Family Life Pastor at Christ Fellowship Church in Fallston, MD. Prior to that he served at Terra Nova Church in Troy, NY for seven years and taught Hermeneutics to ninth and tenth graders. He is married to Hannah and is about to be a father for the second time. He occasionally blogs at Hardcore Grace.

An Interview with Justin and Lindsey Holcomb, Authors of God Made All of Me

  It’s perhaps a parent’s greatest fear – that at some point his or her child will become a victim of sexual abuse. The statistics are alarming: Approximately one in five children will become victims by his or her 18th birthday. Authors Justin and Lindsey Holcomb have responded to parents’ concerns by writing God Made All of Me, a resource for moms, dads, and caregivers who want to protect and educate their children.

GCD: What prompted you to write God Made All of Me? What age range was it written for?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: The book is for 2-8 year olds. We wrote it because we have two young children and know that parents need tools to help talk with their kids about their bodies and to help them understand the difference between appropriate and inappropriate touch. It allows families to build a first line of defense against sexual abuse in the safety of their own homes. Our goal is to help parents and caregivers in protecting their children from sexual abuse. Because private parts are private, there can be lots of questions, curiosity, or shame regarding them. For their protection, children need to know about private parts and understand that God made their body and made it special.

GCD: You were intentional about using the terms “appropriate” and “inappropriate,” when referring to kinds of touch, instead of the words “good” or “bad.” Why?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: It is important to be clear with adults and children about the difference between touch that is appropriate and touch that is inappropriate. Experts discourage any use of the phrases “good touch” and “bad touch” for two main reasons. First, some sexual touch feels good and then children get confused wondering if it was good or bad. Second, children who have been taught “good touch” or  “bad touch” would be less likely to tell a trusted adult as they perceive they have done something bad.

To your child say something like: “Most of the time you like to be hugged, snuggled, tickled, and kissed, but sometimes you don’t and that’s OK. Let me know if anyone—family member, friend, or anyone else—touches you or talks to you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable.”

GCD: How did you approach talking about this issue with your own children?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: We started by teaching them the proper names of their private parts at an early age and telling them that their bodies are strong, beautiful, and made by God. We read books to them from an early age on this topic and would talk about who can help them in the bathroom or bath and that it was OK for the doctor to check their private parts at appointments when mom or dad is present.

We would also roll play different scenarios to get them thinking what they would do if someone approached them and wanted to touch their private parts, show theirs, take pictures, etc. Play the “what if” game with them at the dinner table with different scenarios to see their thinking and problem solving skills. “If someone asked you to show them your private parts and promised to give you candy if you didn’t tell anyone what would you do?” Remind them that they can tell you anything and anytime without fear of getting into trouble.

We’ve also tried to instill a sense of control our kids have over their own bodies. We would tell them to say “no” or “stop” when they were all done being hugged, tickled, or wrestled. We encourage them to practice this with us so they feel confident saying it to others if the need arises. We also tell them they don’t have to hug or kiss a family member if they don’t want to and teach them how to express this without being rude. It is important to empower children to be in charge of their bodies instead of at the mercy of adults.

GCD: What are some practical things parents can do to protect their children from sexual abuse?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: In our book, the last page is to parents and called, “9 Ways to Protect Your Children from Sexual Abuse.” Some of the key practical things parents can do are: teach proper names of private body parts, talk about touches, throw out the word “secret,” and identify whom to trust. You can read about all 9 here.

GCD: It’s every parent’s worst nightmare, but what should a mom or dad do if they suspect their child might have been the victim of sexual abuse?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: You can call your local sexual assault crisis center and talk with a child advocate or hotline volunteer about your concerns. They will be able to point you to the proper authorities. Some areas would have you speak with a detective where other areas would have you talk to a victim witness advocate. Don’t ask probing questions that could instill fear in your child. Just assure them that you are so proud of them for telling you what happened and that you believe them and that your job is to keep them safe.

GCD: Tell us about GRACE. What does it offer to the church and families?

JUSTIN & LINDSEY: GRACE stands for “Godly Response to Abuse in Christian Environments” and the mission is to empower the Christian community through education and training to recognize, prevent, and respond to child abuse. We help educate churches and other faith based organizations how to protect vulnerable individuals from abuse and we help churches love and serve survivors of abuse who are in their midst.  Check out GRACE at www.netgrace.org.

—

To keep up with Justin and Lindsey Holcomb, visit www.godmadeallofme.com. You can also follow Justin’s page on Facebook or follow them on Twitter (@justinholcomb and @lindseyholcomb).

Loving and Seeking Justice for the Unborn

In our media-saturated culture, it’s unlikely you haven’t heard about the undercover Planned Parenthood videos released over the last several weeks. The Center for Medical Progress has released four videos and counting of Planned Parenthood executives discussing and admitting to trafficking body parts of aborted preborn children. In the middle of our society’s culture war over elective abortion and the surrounding industry, these types of exposé videos are common place. However, these video are unique because they’ve gone viral. As of today there were over 2.7 million views on the original video that included highlights of the Planned Parenthood leader casually discussing selling and marketing livers, lungs, and other body parts that she personally removed from preborn children during elective abortions. While the topic was trending on social media, like many other headlines of horrific acts of violence, our culture and even some Christians were uncertain how to react. Even though self-identifying Pro-Choice activists who generally support Planned Parenthood were displaying moral disgust, many Christians were still unable to biblically respond to the phenomenal atrocities exposed. Now many Christians (along with our Pro-Choice neighbors) had a “gut reaction” to such an ugly story, but ultimately many were still not sure how to respond or even what to think about this injustice and repulsive practice. This discomfort disabled Christians from even trying discuss the topic with their neighbors, which always proves to be more difficult than sharing an article or video on social media.

Personally, I was surprised to see Pro-Choicers who support legalized elective abortion and Planned Parenthood, disapprove of this secretive business of trafficking the body parts of aborted children. As a Christian and someone who is deeply committed to restoring justice for our preborn neighbors, my first reaction was to balk and point at the hypocrisy of others. I was looking down on these Pro-Choice advocates who for some reason see something wrong with THIS atrocity, but not the legalized, intentional taking of an innocent preborn human’s life. This immediate urge to condemn others is not just foolish because of Christ’s teaching on judging others (Matt. 7:1-5), but because I’m condemning those individuals for responding the way God designed them to. The unavoidable “gut reaction” that we have to such unjust practices and humans rights abuses reveals our humanity—created in the image of God. We are designed to be moral agents with an active conscience. This moral capacity to weigh and approve or disapprove of what happens in the world is a common grace give to us by our Creator.

These types of abuses and injustice abound in our world because of the Fall. However, the Fall has not just corrupted nature but humans as well. This means that humans now willingly practice injustice like elective abortions and human tissue trafficking, but also, the Fall has marred our consciences. The compass that distinguishes between right and wrong is distorted although never destroyed. The hypocrisy I want to accuse those who support elective abortion of, is actually proof that we are moral beings practicing although imperfectly an important task that resembles our Creator.

Paul explains in Romans 2:14-16 that even unbelievers have “the works of the law written on their hearts” and “their conscience also bears witness, and their conflicting thoughts accuse or even excuse them.” However, Paul also makes clear that the human conscience is not incorruptible. Earlier in Romans 1:28 Paul explains that because of rebellion against the truth God gives unbelievers “up to a debased mind.” In short, yes our consciences can be misinformed or misdirected, but all humans have a basic yearning for justice in this unjust world. Believers and unbelievers alike are acutely aware that, at the very least, things are not as they should be and have an undeniable built-in moral yearning.

A Thirst for Justice in a Moral Desert

This thirst for justice in the moral dessert of a Post-Genesis 3 world is not a new human phenomenon. We see David himself was in the same position. In Psalm 10, David cries out to the Lord because he witnessed appalling human rights abuse, unethical practices, and the failed judicial systems of his country.

In Psalm 10:2, David describes how he saw the wicked hotly pursue the poor, trying to catch the helpless in wickedly devised schemes. David describes how the wicked sit in ambush in the villages and in hiding places they murder the innocent (v. 8). He mourns that in his land the wicked look for ways to take advantage of the poor.  Some of these injustices we’re most sensitive to and broken over today are not just random crimes or accidents, but they have become systems that target certain demographics.

David then writes that the wicked “[lurk] like a lion so that he may seize the poor” (v. 9). Planned Parenthood and the entire abortion industry demonstrate this predatory mindset. These are business models built around selling a service that is deadly to the preborn and harmful to women. These newly released videos show Planned Parenthood acting like predators. Again, the image of verse 10 is appropriate when David writes, “The helpless are crushed, sink down, and fall by his might.” The Psalmist is watching the wicked not only scheme and draw the helpless in his net, but violence always accompanies his schemes. Once the helpless are in his net, the wicked crushes them and they perish.

He sits in ambush in the villages; in hiding places he murders the innocent. His eyes stealthily watch for the helpless; he lurks in ambush like a lion in his thicket; he lurks that he may seize the poor; he seizes the poor when he draws him into his net. 10 The helpless are crushed, sink down, and fall by his might.

While there is room for Christians to discuss and work in other areas like environmental justice, the highest ethical concern in Scripture are attacks on the marginalized who are made in God’s image.

These attacks are wrong and unjust. Injustice didn't sit well with David and it shouldn’t sit well with us. The reason these systematic wrongdoings disturbed David so deeply and should affect us today is not just because God had commanded his people to do justice, but because our drive for justice comes from the very character of God whose image we are created in.

Justice as Central in Redemptive History

In Psalm 10:12-18 David reaffirms that justice is a central attribute of God. Also at crucial junctures in redemptive history, the Lord over and over again reveals himself as the God who executes justice. For instance, Moses delivers the Law from God to the people of Israel and says,

For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great, the mighty, and the awesome God, who is not partial and takes no bribe. He executes justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the sojourner, giving him food and clothing.

In another Psalm, David simply proclaims: “The Lord loves justice” (Ps. 37:28).  This simple premise is cosmically consequential since it is the very fuel of the gospel. The narrative of Scripture is driven by the fundamental premise that the Lord, the creator and redeemer, is a just God.

Accordingly, throughout the narrative of Scripture we see the Lord intervene in human history to restore social justice—in the Exodus when the Hebrews became a socially disenfranchised class in Egypt and in Judges the Lord reminds Israel, “I led you up from Egypt and brought you out of the house of slavery. And I delivered you from the hand of the Egyptians and from the hand of all who oppressed you, and drove them out before you and gave you their land” (Jgs. 6:8-9).

The ultimate expression of God’s just character is in the person and work of Jesus Christ.Christ is the fulfillment of God’s Justice. When Isaiah was telling of the Messiah, he prophesizes that Christ “will bring justice to the nations” (Is. 42:1-4; Matt 12:18). At the heart of the gospel, Christ voluntarily receives injustice in order to fulfill God’s just verdict as Philip explains in Acts 8:32:

Like a sheep he was led to the slaughter and like a lamb before its shearer is silent, so he opens not his mouth. In his humiliation justice was denied him. Who can describe his generation? For his life is taken away from the earth.

Because of our sin is against a holy and just God, we have earned eternal punishment. But God, being rich in mercy as well as justice, devised a plan before we even existed, not to set aside his justice but to fulfill it by practicing his mercy. So in place of sinners, Jesus Christ became human to receive the wrath of God on the cross that we deserved as rebels. However, Christ rose again, conquered death, ascended into heaven, and sits at the right hand of the Father so that now through the Holy Spirit those who have faith in Christ’s victorious work and repent do not receive eternal punishment for their transgressions against a just God.

God has done something epic about injustice. He absorbed the injustice of sin and evil at the cross. All history is shaped around this narrative because God loves justice.

Loving and Seeking Justice in Light of the Gospel

In order to love and seek justice in light of the gospel, the people of God need to mature in several areas.First, we must not think about those we disagree with as our political adversaries but recognize them as God’s image bearers who although misinformed can act on their sense of right and wrong. Also, we must think the way David did and have the moral certitude he did about social injustice. Public figures and blogs shouldn’t be our first stop to inform our consciences on social injustice. We must weigh everything with revealed truth and our moral consciences. Our response to wickedness should signal that our God is the source of justice. We need to hold our informed convictions boldly. For instance, intentionally causing an innocent human’s death is a moral wrong—no matter who does it or whether our government has sanctioned it. We should seek to understand the ethics of God revealed in Scripture to inform how we interpret our post-Fall world.

Second, like David we should look at injustice instead of averting our eyes from the ugly stories, the heartbroken victims, and the helpless. In order to do justice, we must be willing to endure the moral discomfort of looking into the brokenness.

Third, we need to fervently and genuinely pray for the injustice in our land to end. Psalm 10 is not just a song; it was a moment in which David was crying out to the Lord and pleading for God to protect the innocent and helpless in his land. Last, as we draw near to God, we must walk towards the victims. This walking must include a spatial nearness and also a prioritizing socially and politically. We should pray and work to end these atrocities and seek to restore justice in our land through the power of Jesus Christ our Righteousness (1 Cor. 1:30).

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John Seago (@JohnSeago) serves as the Legislative Director for Texas Right to Life. He leads the research, writing, and lobbying for state legislation on bioethical issues like abortion, euthanasia, stem cell research, and patients rights. John graduated with a double major in History of Ideas and Biblical Studies from Southeastern College in Wake Forest, North Carolina. He studied Philosophy at University of Dallas for several years and is now earning his Master’s in Bioethics from Trinity International University. John lives in Austin, Texas with his wife Brandy and two children Nahum (5) and Sophia (3).

Catechizing Our Children in Wonder

Success by Religious Conformity

It was one of those moments when I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I opted to just shrink lower into our second-row pew, stifle my giggles, and thank God for my seven-year-old son and all his glorious honesty.

My husband pastors a rural church in SW Virginia; and while we do our best to keep our kids out of the fishbowl, we do expect them to participate in the full-scope of congregational life. This includes our mid-week Bible study. This isn’t usually a problem, but like all of us, there are days when our children would rather stay home. Sometimes they’re tired, busy doing other things, or in the case of my seven-year-old son, simply finds his Legos more interesting than sitting still for an hour.

On this particular Wednesday night, my husband and I had dealt with the standard objections over dinner, and by 7:05, everyone was safely ensconced in our pew with our heads bowed. The head deacon was opening the service with prayer as only a head deacon from a rural Baptist church can when about half way through, he asked God to touch the hearts of “those who could have come tonight, but chose not to.” Not missing a beat, my son piped up, “Well, I didn’t want to come, but I HAD to.”

My son’s resistance to church is not the only discipleship hurdle we face as parents. It is easily matched by his older sister’s recent acknowledgment that she finds God’s eternality “weird” and by the fact that their five-year-old brother regularly asks to pray at meal time for the sole purpose of controlling the length of the prayer. (“Dear-God-Thank-you-for-this-food-help-us-to love-each-other-Amen.”) If parenting success is measured by religious conformity, we’re batting 0 for 3 here.

Discipleship Through Fear

These kinds of situations have the potential to worry Christian parents who desire to pass their faith on to their children. With reports of widespread Millennial angst and stories of apologists’ daughters rejecting Christianity, it easy to fear our children will not come to a personal relationship with Christ. It’s even easier to respond out of that fear by simply doubling our efforts to force faith into them through more catechism, more Bible memory, more “church.”

Part of the reason we do this is because we tend to believe discipleship happens through the accumulation of religious knowledge. A quick Google search for “children’s discipleship” brings back resource after resource—everything from catechisms to Bible memory systems to pint-sized devotional books–all promising to produce faith in the next generation of believers. What I rarely hear discussed is the necessity of discipling our children through “natural revelation.” When theologians use the term “natural revelation,” they are referring to what God has revealed about himself through the world around us. “Specific revelation,” on the other hand, is what God has revealed about himself through the Scripture.

And while I believe Scripture is essential to the process of belief, Scripture was never intended to be engaged in a vacuum. Instead, faith happens as the Holy Spirit impresses the truth of God’s Word (specific revelation) onto a heart that has been primed to accept it by experiencing the truth of God in the world around it (natural revelation). Like a pair of chopsticks, the two must work together.

The Apostle Paul understood this and it’s precisely why in Acts 17—that famous Mars Hill sermon—he begins by appealing to what the Athenians already knew through their experience of the world. They already believed in some “unknown God” because they could see his works both in them and around them. Most of us understand the importance of this approach in adult evangelism; we craft winsome arguments and appeal to the nature of the cosmos and the intrinsic code of right and wrong that seems to be written on every human heart. What fewer of us recognize is that we must evangelize and disciple our children in this exact same way. We must evangelize and disciple our children through wonder as much as through catechism.

Wonder as Much as Catechisms

In Orthodoxy, G. K. Chesterton, that great British philosopher of the last century, writes that he gained his understanding of the world as a child:

“My first and last philosophy, that which I believe in with unbroken certainty, I learnt in the nursery . . . a certain way of looking at life, which was created in me by the fairy tales, but has since been meekly ratified by mere facts.”

It is this “certain way of looking at life” that many Christian parents neglect—or perhaps have never even acquired for themselves. We are not merely stuffing our children’s heads with facts; we are shaping hearts to believe that certain realities are true so that when they do finally encounter the facts essential to faith, they will already have hearts that can recognize them. When they finally memorize “In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth,” it will find lodging because they have already gazed up into this same heaven and marveled at its brilliant stars; and they have already let the sand from this same earth slip through their chubby fingers.

So that in the end, they don’t believe there is a Creator simply because Genesis 1 tells them so; they believe there is a Creator because they have seen his Creation. 


As you go about discipling your children, as you teach them their Bible verses and correct them when they disobey, do not neglect the sacred discipline of awe. Take them to the mountains to walk forest trails in search of the millipedes and butterflies that are the works of his hands. Take them to the seashore to be knocked over by the power of a wave so that one day they’ll know how to be knocked over by power of God. Take them to the art museum to thrill at colors and shapes and textures whose beauty can only be explained by the One who is Beauty himself. Take them to the cities to crane their necks to the see the tops of sky scrapers and shiver at God’s miracle of physics that keeps them from tumbling down.

And then take them to church.

Take them to church to bow their heads and receive the Word that gives them the ability to know the God behind all these wonders in a personal way. Take them to church to let the joy of their little hearts overflow in worship of the One through whom all these things consist. And take them to church, so that in the midst of other worshipers, in the midst of other image bearers, they too will be able to find their place in the great, wide world he has made.

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Hannah Anderson lives in the hauntingly beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. She spends her days working beside her husband in rural ministry, caring for their three young children, and scratching out odd moments to write. In those in-between moments, she contributes to a variety of Christian publications and is the author of Made for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image (Moody, 2014). You can connect with her at her blog Sometimes a Light and on Twitter @sometimesalight.

3 Tremendous Tasks for Dads (and Grace for When We Fail)

It’s that time of the year again. The time when multitudes flock to Hallmark aisles and stand awkwardly among strangers as they are confronted with one of the most powerful, delicate, and potentially painful relationships known to humanity. That’s right—Father’s Day. The day set apart to celebrate fatherhood and honor those who, for better or worse, have the greatest impact upon society in general and their children in particular. What is it about the relationship with our dads (or lack thereof) that contributes greatly to shaping who we are and what we become? Why can one father enable a young woman to flourish in her femininity, while another promotes her downward spiral? Why does the presence of a father nurture a son’s masculinity, while his absence fosters a sense of insecurity and confusion? Could it be that earthly fathers possess such influence because of the way in which they point towards the heavenly Father?

Earthly Fathers Mirror the Heavenly Father

God ordained fatherhood to reveal his own essential nature. This fundamental role was built into the family structure from the beginning to make visible the invisible God. God willed that earthly fathers would mirror him as the perfect heavenly Father and thus teach their children about his nature and attributes.

There is a powerful relationship between the knowledge of an earthly father and understanding of the heavenly Father. When a dad is merciful, patient, and loving towards his children they have a better chance of understanding the paternal nature of Yahweh when he reveals himself as “A God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness” (Exod. 34:6). Conversely, if the only picture a child has of his father is an angry man who doesn’t like to be interrupted while watching golf (or who takes off altogether!), there’s a greater likelihood that child will struggle to see God as a loving, committed Father.

We see this correlation clearly in Jesus’ teaching on prayer in Matthew 7:9-11,

Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

Jesus reveals that the provision of an earthly father teaches us to trust in the provision of our heavenly Father and openly present our needs to him. He reasons from the lesser to the greater: if earthly fathers (who are fallen) have an innate impulse within to provide for their children how much more does the heavenly Father (who is perfect) desire to meet the needs of his children!

This passage resonates with me. My dad is single-handedly the most generous man I’ve ever met. There is not a stingy bone in his body! Though he’s a fallen man, he always provided for my needs. It never crossed my mind that he wouldn’t provide for me—I simply knew he would. Consequently, during my thirteen years as a Christian I’ve never doubted that God the Father would meet all of my needs. I’ve always approached his throne to openly present my requests believing that “every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights” (Jas. 1:17).

It’s not a coincidence that an attribute my earthly father excelled in is an attribute I’ve always understood about my heavenly Father. His generosity mirrored the Father’s generosity and taught me about the lavish nature of God’s heart. My perception of the Father was shaped by my experience with my dad. I’m not alone in this.All fathers (again, for better or worse) daily disciple their children and teach them, perhaps unconsciously, about the character of God.

Dads As Disciple-Makers

Because of the divinely appointed influence the role of “father” has in teaching others about God the Father, all dads are disciple-makers. If you are a father or acting as a father figure in someone’s life, you have a tremendous task before you.

1. Recognize This Responsibility.

Every day you are creating little disciples! Your words, actions, and emotions teach those around you about the nature of God and his heart towards them. You have the opportunity to cultivate an atmosphere in which children are drawn towards the heavenly Father. In the way you shepherd their little hearts through conversation, discipline, laughter, you are creating fertile soil for the reception of the gospel. You’re constantly painting a picture of a Father they will one day desire to know (or not know) and training their adolescent affections to long for a relationship with him. Daily you are doing the preparatory work that makes way for the gospel to be received when the time is ripe.

2. Accept the Reality.

You will fail at this task! Despite your best intentions, you cannot perfectly image God the Father. You are a broken man who needs Jesus as much as your children do. This doesn’t mean you don’t take seriously your responsibility as a father, but it does mean you do so with an informed understanding of the gospel. The gospel tells us that we all fail to image God, but Jesus came as the image of the invisible God (Col. 1:15) and perfectly revealed the nature of the Father (Heb. 1:3). He died in your place for all your failure, including your failure as a father, and rose to life for the forgiveness of your sins (1 Cor. 15:3-4). He ascended to heaven and poured out his Spirit so you could have his indwelling presence helping you walk in covenant faithfulness (Ezek. 36:27). As a believer, you have God’s own Spirit within you empowering you to lead your children towards the heavenly Father.

3. Walk in Repentance.

 Your children don’t need you to be perfect; they need you to repent! The danger of emphasizing your role as a father is that you could walk away thinking you need to be the capital “H” hero of your children’s lives. You can’t be the hero of their stories anymore than you can be the hero of your own story. This isn’t a legalistic pep rally urging you to be the “Superman/Superdad” figure in your household. What a false burden to bear! The exhortation is to cultivate an environment in your home that illuminates the true capital “H” Hero of the story—Jesus Christ. You do this by walking in continual repentance in front of your children. When you sin tell your children you messed up, ask for Jesus’ forgiveness in front of them, and point them towards the perfect Dad who will never fail them. As you repent openly and frequently you will create a safe place for your children to experience transparency and intimacy leading them towards the perfect Dad.

To All Fathers

Gospel-Centered Discipleship wants to wish all of the dads a very Happy Father’s Day! May you richly cherish the love of your heavenly Father even as you pour out that grace-infused love upon your children. Always remember, “Children are a heritage from the LORD” (Ps. 127:3) and “Blessed is the man who fills his quivers with them!” (Ps. 127:5). God has tasked you with a special role in your children’s lives only you can play. May you walk in this responsibility with much humility, joy, and reliance on the Spirit of God.

To my own dad, Lonnie Byers, Happy Father’s Day! I know our story wasn’t exactly “perfect” and it won’t ever end up on a Hallmark card, but that’s just as well. Ours is the story of repentance and redemption in a broken, fallen world that has provided ample opportunity to experience the grace of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, more deeply together. That’s something Hallmark doesn’t know how to market. I wouldn’t change a thing! Even during hard times you always met my needs, thus preparing my heart to understand the lavish generosity of my heavenly Father when I came to know him. I am eternally grateful to you for how you mirrored the image of God the Father in this.

Thank you for all you’ve done Dad. Love, Whit

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Whitney Woollard has served in ministry alongside her husband Neal for over six years. She holds an undergraduate degree in Biblical Studies from Moody Bible Institute and just finished her Master of Arts in Biblical and Theological Studies from Western Seminary. She is passionate about equipping disciples to read and study God’s Word well resulting in maturing affections for Jesus and his gospel message. Neal and Whitney currently live in Portland, OR where they love serving the local church. Follow her on Twitter @whitneywoollard.

Reconciled At the Table

The way many churches exclude the Lord’s Supper from their regular worship service deeply concerns me. The Lord’s Supper forces the church to look itself in the mirror. When Jesus welcomes the congregation to the table of fellowship, we are confronted with the reality that he is far more welcoming and hospitable than we are. Christians can often be fickle people. On the one hand, this is understandable. Christians have an objective standard from which to judge right and wrong. This is a good thing because Christians have a moral and ethical compass with which we can navigate the swells of an increasingly relativistic society.

On the other hand, this can be a bad thing. Christians are often prone to use God’s objective standards to shun and exclude people when the God they worship is neither shunning nor excluding.

Look around the congregation.

How many people can you count that you would not invite to your table? There are great sinners in the congregation. There are people you don’t like. But all of these people are welcomed to the Lord’s table at the his invitation.

Jesus once told his disciples that he will draw all men to himself when he is lifted up (Jn. 12:32). What happened to Jesus when he was lifted up? He was broken. What happens to the bread when the minister lifts it up before the congregation? It is broken. The Lord’s Supper is much more than an act of remembrance for individual Christians. The Lord’s Supper is a participatory event where all men find themselves drawn to Christ’s broken body.

When Jesus’ body was broken the walls of separation between Jew and gentile, male and female, slave and free, black and white were broken as well (Gal. 3:28). This happens in the Lord’s Supper. People who would not dine together at their own tables are brought together at the Lord’s Table, they are brought together by the broken body of Jesus Christ. At the Lord’s Table, we participate in and show forth the great reconciliation of mankind.

Moreover, because the table is fenced, it is not up to us whether or not our neighbor will participate or not, it is up to use whether we will participate or not. At our own tables, we decide who we will invite and who we will exclude. At the Lord’s table, we are all invited, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matt. 11:28), but we are also told that we are to examine ourselves (1 Cor. 11:28).

When we are invited to the Lord’s Table each week, we are taught to look at our own hearts in regards to fellowship rather than to our neighbor’s faults. Sinful hearts look outward for excuses not to commune with others, sinful hearts turn in on themselves. In the Garden, Adam’s sin was a sin of consumption and blame shifting. When he was confronted, Adam shifted the blame on Eve, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate” (Gen. 3:12). In the Lord’s Supper, we are invited to eat rather than prohibited. Further, as we participate we are conditioned to remove the plank from our own eye before commenting on the speck in our neighbors (Matt. 7:5).

Look around the congregation.

How many people look just like you? Are they all white (let’s hope not)? Are they all black (let’s hope not)? Are they all republicans or democrats (let’s hope they’re libertarians)? No, there are people from all walks of life, all races, all socioeconomic classes, and all ideologies being drawn to the broken body of Christ.

In a world where selfishness has become a cultural virtue, the Lord’s table is hardly a place to perpetuate selfish interests. At the Lord’s Table, you dine with and commune with people you might never dream of inviting to your own table. But there you are, partaking of the same loaf and drinking from the same cup. In this act much is being proclaimed. Who you eat with says a lot about you and at the Lord’s Table we eat with Jesus, this cannot be overlooked. But while we eat with Jesus we are also eating with other people who are eating with Jesus.

The Lord’s table proclaims not only that we belong to Christ, but also that we belong to one another—all our differences and problems included. God’s people are not static in our relationships. Both vertically with God and horizontally with each other our relationships are dynamic. The Lord’s Supper images the dynamic nature to the life of Christ’s Body. We are growing, albeit with growing pains, further and further into the image of Christ, the head of the Body (Eph. 4: 15-16).

The church is a body of many members. Further, God’s word serves as a two edged sword cutting to the hearts of his people (Heb. 4:12) who have become living sacrifices (Rom. 12:1). Throughout each service God’s word has cut His church into pieces just as the levitical sacrifices are cut into pieces (the sermon). But the service does not end here. The church must learn that we are only broken by God’s Word because the Word of God was broken for us: “This is my body broken for you.” Moreover, as the body of many members (the church) partakes of the broken body of Christ we are made whole again by our participation in the one loaf (1 Cor. 10:17).

Perhaps the reason there is so much strife in the church nowadays is because we are not communing with one another as we ought. Our ultimate allegiances need to be formed not by who we would invite to our tables but by whom Jesus, weekly, invites to his.

Just food for thought.

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Michael and his wife Caroline live in Athens, GA. Michael blogs weekly at Torrey Gazette. You can follow Michael on Twitter @_Michael_Hansen.

5 Ways to Discern a Shared Call to Ministry

When my wife and I first met, I didn’t know what I wanted to do after college. In fact, I was failing out of college. Now eleven years later, my wife is a pastor’s wife and any other children that we may have in addition to our daughter will each be a pastor’s kid. There was a whole host of things that happened in those eleven years, but one event made me say, “I think God is calling me to ministry.” I felt the internal call like many before me. Soon after that, I was looking into seminary and committing myself to four years of work. At times, seminary nearly made me want to commit myself. Prior to this, my wife and I had conversations about this call—what it meant and what it would mean. We talked about how it would change our lives, but we didn’t fully comprehend how. We can both attest to how God’s calling shapes us. It changes who we are, how we live, and how we maneuver through life. We essentially filter life through God’s calling on our lives. For example, if we are called to be a parent, we process decisions through that parental calling. This is a bit of what happens to the family of those called to ministry. Everything filters through that calling. My wife’s overall calling to Christ, to be my wife, and to be our daughter’s mother is also mingled with my calling to vocational ministry. My daughter will not be able to do certain things and will live a certain kind of life because of my calling. That’s why the call is a shared one.

A Shared Call

Much of what can be read in regards to assessing a call to ministry focuses on the individual person being primarily called into ministry, which makes some sense. However, other people are affected by a man’s call. I asked my wife several times, “Do you feel called to be a pastor’s wife?” That question was usually a part of the larger conversations and prayers regarding what God was leading me towards. Many who assess church planters will say to pay attention to the planter’s wife because she will tell the truth about calling and readiness. If that’s true, God calls not just the man, but his family as well.

Many pastors whose wives didn’t share the call could explain the importance of that shared call. For the pastor’s wife who doesn’t feel called to ministry, the pressures of ministry would only be expanded. Two people united in the covenant of marriage cannot successfully go in two, entirely different directions in terms of their service to Christ—at least not in separate directions that are not mutually supportive.

For children, I could not ask my daughter if she felt called to be a pastor’s kid. She was just born one. Nevertheless, my call will alter the rest of her life. Her walk with Christ and conversion will be vastly different than her mother’s or mine. Her call to be a pastor’s kid came through the sovereign will of God forming her and bringing her to us. The same could be said about all of us who consider ourselves to be partakers of the shed blood of Jesus. None of us, before we were saved, contemplated feeling called to be disciples of Jesus. Yet we were called. In the same way, no Christian should sit down to decide whether they are called to share the gospel, because every Christian is called to share the gospel in light of the Great Commission. Therefore, callings are entirely about God’s design and less about our feelings. Our feelings may reflect God’s design, but they are not sovereign over that design. Thus, we can see how children can also be a part of this shared, family calling.

In what can be considered an effort to speak to the ramifications of this shared call, the Apostle Paul exhorts the unmarried to stay unmarried and encourages marriage if one cannot exercise self-control (1 Cor. 7:8-9). Later in that chapter, he explains why he encourages the unmarried to stay unmarried, “The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided,” (1 Cor. 7:32b-34a). Paul says taking a wife and a family adds refinement to one’s calling. A married man cannot do certain things, because he has a responsibility to his wife and children. The Church has a husband and he died for her so we don’t have to. God as Father and as bridegroom exemplifies for us the importance that he places on those two responsibilities. In other words, God is concerned about husbands and fathers being about the business of being husbands and fathers. Thus, a pastor who is a husband and a father, as he works out his primary calling as a proper disciple of Christ, is first a husband and a father, before he is a pastor.

Additionally, it seems that Paul affirms this refinement of calling that comes through having a family. One could call it a limitation, but that could be misunderstood as a negative thing. Everyone who is trying to discern what God is calling them to is asking God for limitation of that calling or for God to set aside the things to which they are not called so that they might be limited to the thing to which they are called. Therefore, I think it is safe to deduce from Paul’s words as well that there is a collective or family calling that is placed on a couple and their children.

In light of this, it is crucial that those seeking to be in ministry or even those in ministry discuss the following with your wives:

1. Does your wife feel called to be a pastor’s wife? It can be helpful to look at other couples in ministry and examine their lives, their responsibilities, and their ministries. It can also be helpful to talk to those couples about what it is like being in ministry, both the good and the bad.
2. How will this impact your future or current kids? If you have kids already, how will this impact their lives? Will they be able to adjust to this new life? Perhaps it may be appropriate if they are old enough to process it, to ask what their thoughts are about this change. If you don’t have kids yet, in what ways can you start to pray and prepare to be raising PK’s?
3. Is your wife’s support simply an affirmation that she supports whatever you want to do or does she feel a shared passion for people and seeing them grow in Christ? There is a huge difference between the two. If the answer is the first, then it could mean that she will end up at least frustrated or possibly even resentful. To some degree, she should probably share in your passion for people and their growth in Christ.
4. Will you both be able to accept the change in financial means from what you either lived with before or what you expected to be living with? This can be challenging when switching from “secular” employment to vocational ministry. It could also be a challenge if you had an expectation for your financial life that is different from the life of vocational ministry.
5. Is your family ready to open itself up to a congregation? It is crucial to a healthy Christian life to be known by our brothers and sisters in Christ. However, in pastoral ministry, the pastor’s life as well as his family’s lives are on display for the congregation. This can be played out through opening your home in hospitality to those in the congregation or just the visibility of the little conversations with your wife, the outbursts of your kids, and the like.

In recognizing the shared calling that a life in ministry is, we can do well for our families and our ministries to keep these things frequently in our prayers and conversations. This gets to the root of the health of our souls when we talk about how on board our wives and children are with what God has called us to. It is near impossible or at least just incredibly challenging to be effective without a shared sense of calling in our marriages and families. If we take the time in our preparation for ministry to pray and talk through these things, God will bless that. Even if we find ourselves having been in ministry for some time, we would do well to begin or continue to pray and talk through these things. May God bless you in your service to him, whatever and wherever that is!

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Nick Abraham (DMin student at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary) lives in Navarre, OH with his wife and daughter. He serves as an Associate Pastor at Alpine Bible Church in Sugarcreek, OH. He is a contributor to Make, Mature, Multiply: Becoming Fully-Formed Disciples of Jesus and blogs at Like Living Stones.

4 Ways to Serve a School

One of the simplest ways to love a city is to serve its schools. Education, among other structures, is one of the main components on which a city thrives, creates culture, and builds the wellbeing of the population. We are called to seek the welfare of a city (Jer. 29:7), and you can do no better than to invest your time and energy into a local school. The school that my wife and I serve needs a fair amount of help. We have been serving there for the last seven years. We enjoy serving there, because of the relationships we get to build with normal everyday people, and the opportunities we get to bless them. More than just the practical and social reasons, though, there are theological reasons. We get to serve there, because we have a great Lord and Savior who served us perfectly, laying down his life and dying for us while we were still sinful and rebellious. We would confess, however, that often our reasons for serving the school do not always fall in line with this truth. Sure we want to see the people of the school come to know Jesus; sure we want to see people’s lives changed and we want God to be glorified through us—all good evangelical notions.  Sometimes we might have other practical or quasi-selfish reasons for serving the school, such as for the betterment of the school, or that our kids will benefit from our time there. Those are not bad reasons. However, in the gospel we need to remember that all our motivation, strength, and the resources we need to serve, come from how Jesus served us. This is the truth by which we are often convicted and what causes us to repent and seek the best reason.

With the gospel in mind, then, here are four ways to serve and bless a school. These simple methods are transferable for any school context in any city.

1. Pray for the school 

We share this first, because it is the most important. Prayer works, because God works. It is not a magic formula, but a command and reality that God has called us to. Our family does not have a systematic way of doing this; mostly we pray when the Holy Spirit reminds us. When we take my kids and our neighborhood friends to school, we pray for them, their teachers, and the school as whole. It is an encouragement for us to just pray, because we are being reminded of how much we need his power and grace to work in and through us at the school.

2. Ask how to help and show up

We began to realize the significance of this when we first moved to our city and began serving. Derek had called around to a few schools asking how we could help. One of them had a laundry list of ways that we could serve, so we decided to show up and help there. At the time, they were doing these monthly Family Fun Night events, so we showed up to serve the meal and clean up afterward. This was a good, tangible way to serve and meet people. Also, it came with the by-product of giving us and our kids a context and familiarity for where they would eventually attend school.

Also, extracurricular clubs and organizations are great places to show up at. Our school has a unicycling club led by a family in the school. We decided to team up with the family to try it out. Initially, we knew nothing about unicycling except that you sit on one wheel and try to stay on the thing. Our oldest daughter picked it up quickly and our other two younger kids are still learning. These kinds of clubs and activities are such great ways to serve and build relationships with people. Being a part of the unicycle club as a family has been so good for us to share in outreach together (Plus, if everything else in life falls through, we can always run off and join the circus!)

Another good way to show up and help is to serve in a classroom. Colleen makes time once a week, outside of her work schedule, to serve in one of our kids’ classes. Derek has been able to come a few times to serve, and it has been a great way to connect with some of the boys. Colleen has served on the PTA board in the past. Derek currently serves on the Site Council. There are so many ways that you can show up and serve—in the classroom, extracurricular events, committees, fundraisers. Schools have so many needs and just showing up and asking, “How can I help?” will be your first step in real palpable service.

3. Give generously of your time and resources

Another way to serve a school is to give generously. Generosity is part of the definition of grace—giving extravagantly to someone who doesn’t deserve or expect it. You might bring high-quality and generous portions of food or other items to bless the students and staff. If you have kids at the school, you can send them with the best snacks or cupcakes on their birthday, or send extra money with your kids to give to other kids to enjoy using during PTA fundraisers. Bless the teachers and staff with donuts and coffee. Give them coffee gift-cards as an expression of thanks for their hard work. Or, instead of just giving material items, you can give generously of your time and energy. Spend a whole day at the school, and get to know the life of the school. Eat lunch with some of the kids. Hang out at recess and help monitor the activities there. Often it seems we give according to cultural standards of what is assumed to be expected and appropriate, which often can translate to just giving the bare minimum. However, to bless someone is to go above and beyond the normal expectation. Honestly, this is something we are still growing in. Practicing generosity is difficult, because our default mode is to give minimally, not extravagantly. We need to remember how much we’ve been given in Christ, so that we might be convicted to give generously.

4. Practice hospitality

Finally, a good way to serve a school is to practice hospitality outside of the school. Besides being a practical tool to reach out to people, it is also a command from Scripture (Heb. 13:2). You can invite kids and families into your home for the purpose of building community, shared life, and celebration together.  You might plan a fun event centered on a season, or a rhythm in the calendar year like the beginning or end of school. Our kids’ school celebrates “100 days of school,” which is a great time to celebrate with a party. At the beginning of the school year, we hosted a “Back to School Bash” party for some of our kids’ friends. It was awesome! It gave us the opportunity to meet some of the kids’ parents, and it was a great way to help bring momentum to the school year. We hope to continue with more fun events throughout the year.

In reality, our ministry at the school can feel long and slow. We often don’t get to see the fruit that Jesus is growing in people’s lives. There are some things we’ve done in the past that haven’t worked as well, but there are things we are doing now that seem to work.  Either way, we are benefiting from the maturation of disciples, as we learn to more fully pour out our lives, share our resources, and give time and energy to the school. And as we enjoy the goodness and grace of Jesus poured out for us generously, we get to funnel some of that grace to others at the school, in order that the school might enjoy the grace and presence of Jesus.

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Derek (@derekhiebert) and Colleen Hiebert and their three kids live in Parkland WA. Derek works as the Director of the Western Seminary Seattle Teaching Site, while Colleen works part-time as a nurse. They both serve bi-vocationally with Soma as missional leaders and take pride in their kids’ school.

Carried unto Christ

My children are frequently disobedient—as children tend to be. They got it from their mother, my wife, and . . . from their grandparents. Okay, they got it from me too. But my involvement is more or less irrelevant at this point. So tuck my disobedient children away for a moment. We’ll be returning to this them.

Blessing the Little Children

In developing the theme of discipleship in Luke 18, it has been seen that unceasing prayer in to be honored (18:1-8) as well as the ministerial truth that mercy and humility must be at the root of prayer (18:9-14). In a natural continuation out of Christ’s parable, Luke shows how these elements come into play in practical life. It is at this point in his Gospel, Luke tells the infamous story of Jesus blessing the little children. Since most scholars of the synoptic Gospels presume Luke did not arrange his material chronologically, it is safe to assume that the prayer laden instruction from Jesus is actually tied into this event. As one might expect then, Luke uses some different wording than the other Gospels that helps present some insight to the why of the story,

15 And they were bringing even their babies to Him so that He would touch them, but when the disciples saw it, they began rebuking them. 16 But Jesus called for them, saying, “Permit the children to come to Me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 17 Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all.” —Luke 18:15-17

The first difference in Luke’s rendition is “infants” (translated “babies” above), so these weren’t just children being brought before Jesus. These babies could not have reached Christ on their own. They were, in fact, carried. This is hardly meaningless. Scripture regularly shows the potential for blessing even for those incapable of understanding what was happening to them. This theme of people being brought to Jesus because of physical infirmity, being ill, or demon possessed is common throughout the Gospels. People of all ages and ailments were physically brought to Jesus because they could not bring themselves.

The second difference in Luke’s rendition is that the babies are brought to be “touched” by Jesus. In Matthew’s gospel Jesus lays hands on the children and prayers (Matt 19:13), but for Mark and Luke the word “touch” is used. This slight word change ties the activity of Jesus back to His numerous healings throughout the gospels. Both Luke and Mark focus intently on how healing occurs when Christ touches (Matthew includes these stories but also emphasizes how Christ can heal with his words). Taken at face value, Luke could be insinuating that these children needed healing but that makes the disciples’ decision even stranger. Instead, it should be read as a general insight that what the Messiah touched was often healed, made clean, and pronounced as purified. And to the disciples this status seemed wasted on babies.

Carried unto Christ

These are the truths of the gospel. People are carried unto Christ because they are spiritually infirmed. It is the real touch of Jesus Christ that purifies people. Christian discipleship should recognize all these things to be true and facilitate them. However, unchecked discipleship can result in the mannerism of the disciples. They “rebuked” the infirmed and those carrying them. Perhaps they were concerned about the Savior’s precious time. Perhaps he was extra tired from the healing or was unable to teach them as much during such days. In either case, the disciples had decided that they were not (yet?) worth of Jesus’ time.

Now reintroduce my disobedient children. As their father before them, they are a rebellious lot. Sinful and fallen decisions are made that should not be made. And yet it would be silly for me to propose that my youngest, Judah, apologize to me and explain why he desires my love and forgiveness. No. To a certain symbolic degree he is infirmed. He cries when punished and does not understand the torments of a fallen world. I cannot wait for him to come to me. I must go to him and reassure him that my forgiveness is there. Sometimes, when he has sinned against his mother I pick him up and take him to her so that she can show him the forgiveness that he does not yet know he needs.

As a parent I am called to make forgiveness, comfort, and love accessible to my children. I do these as a stand-in example of the Father and Son. True Christian discipleship should not make Christ less accessible. This can be done through our attitudes, preferences, and behavior. We can obscure the Lord with our theological language, Bible studies, and commentary quotes. The growing disciple of Christ should be increasingly sensitive and compassionate to the infirmed who cannot bring themselves to Christ and who may not remember their encounter with Christ. For it is in these encounters that Christ touches and heals people for His kingdom.

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Joshua Torrey is a New Mexico boy in an Austin, TX world. He is husband to Alaina and father to Kenzie & Judah and spends his free time studying for the edification of his household. These studies include the intricacies of hockey, football, curling, beer, and theology. You can follow him @benNuwn and read his theological musings and running commentary of the Scriptures at The Torrey Gazette.

3 Ways to Battle Spiritual Depression

Many people today struggle with depression in varying degrees and for a variety of reasons. Some people take medication. Some participate in counseling. Regardless of the cause of depression, the gospel can provide comfort and relief for those who are hurting. I want to look at Psalm 42-43 with a view to understand who God is and how he is a help to those who struggle with depression and discouragement. This post will conclude with a look at three ways to battle spiritual depression with the gospel. Solomon rightly notes in Ecclesiastes 1:18 that with much knowledge and wisdom comes sorrow. This means that as we grow in Christ, we may experience seasons in our walk with God where everything in our lives seems to be down in the dumps. That last sentence in my opinion is a neglected truth in Christianity today. While we are rightly taught that we are to be happy in Christ and enjoy him, it is also important to note that the Christian life is not about living on the mountaintops without also living in the valleys of daily life.

Hope in God

The writer in Psalm 42 points out that the one whose soul is indwelt by the Spirit “pants” for God. This means that those who love God are exhorted to “hope in God” (Psalm 42:5; Romans 5:5). The Psalmist here is describing an intimate relationship with God that Christ came to fulfill in John 14:21. He more fully and deeply can empathize with our feelings since he experienced the full range of human emotions but did not sin as the God-man (Psalm 42:14; Mark 15:35).

The sons of Korah refer to God with three names rich in redemptive significance: God, salvation, and rock. Because this God is living, the psalmist hopes that his thirst for satisfaction in worship will be quenched (Psalm 42:4-5). Christ personally came to bring this ever-living God—and the fullness of his joy—to spiritually dead people (Matt. 22:32; John 15:11; 17:13). The particular aspect of “salvation” that the psalmist pines for—the very presence of God (Psalm 42:2-3)—is precisely what the Savior provided. The psalmist needs around-the-clock protection (v.8); Jesus promises it (Matthew 28:20). The Psalmist mourns for a “rock” to give stability to his life (Psalm 42:9); Christ became the cornerstone (Matthew 21:42; Eph. 2:13-22). If we suffer from spiritual depression, we can find relief in the Savior anticipated in this psalm. We must call our souls to build their confidence on the living Rock who stabilizes, protects, and provides the only basis for joy.

Vocabulary for Our Deepest Emotions

The Psalter in Psalm 43 provides all the vocabulary necessary to articulate our deepest emotions. This Psalm encourages God’s people to express without fear even our disappointments with God. Though God has not rejected him, the psalmist feels as though he has. But God uses even our mistaken beliefs about him to draw us to himself. In Christ, God will ultimately show us the relief from despair for which the psalmist longs (“salvation”). By committing his spirit into God’s hands, the suffering servant experienced vindication (v.1; Isa. 50:7-9; Luke 23:46). Because the Lord upheld him in his righteousness, his “light” could not be overwhelmed, and the “truth” he personified could not be discredited (Psalm 43:3; John 1:5; John 18:37). After Christ’s life provided justification, he was raised in holiness and later ascended to Gods “altar” (Psalm 43:3-4). And there he has received with “joy” the inheritance of the nations (v.4; Acts 4:25-26).

Those who are united to Christ by faith may anticipate the same trajectory of “hope in God” (Psalm 43:5). While many languages do not have an equivalent expression to “my God,” this Hebrew poet assures God’s people that he offers himself to be possessed by faith (John 20:17). Complete consignment to Jesus as our Redeemer will result in vindicating righteousness, guiding light, liberating truth, and emboldening access to Gods throne in prayer (Romans 3:21-26; Ephesians 4:20-24; John 8:32; Hebrews 4:16)

THREE WAYS TO BATTLE DEPRESSION

First, fight spiritual depression with the gospel. The gospel is the power of God and provides the fuel by which we go out and face our day with all of its challenges by the grace of God. Whenever I’m feeling discouraged or depressed I don’t run to my books. Conversely, I spend significant time being quiet in prayer with God preaching the truth about who he is, what he is like, and who Jesus is focusing on what he has accomplished for me in his death, burial, and resurrection.  I have also found it helpful to note how he continues to move in my life to grow me to the image of Jesus. In a sense, battling discouragement and depression with the gospel is just another way of applying the reality of who I am in Christ given that fundamental truth alone helps me to get to the bottom of the issue. While I realize some people do seriously struggle with depression and discouragement (if that is you I encourage you to seek professional Christian counseling) what has helped me more than anything else is preaching the gospel to myself.

Second, realize you don’t fight spiritual depression alone. The Bible resoundingly teaches that in the abundance of counselors there is wisdom (Proverbs 11:4). Don’t fake your Christianity acting like everything is okay when it isn’t. Be real about where you are. For most of us that will mean being honest with our close Christian friends about what is going on in our hearts and allowing them to minister to us. On multiple occasions I’ve had to call on close friends to listen, pray, and encourage me. The more you realize that you are not in this Christian life alone and that we desperately need each other, the better. The Christian life is not meant to be lived in isolation but in community with God’s people. Living in community with God’s people and having godly friends to pray for and encourage me has been a huge blessing from God to help me do serious battle against discouragement and depression.

Finally, battling spiritual depression may be spiritual warfare. Some of you struggle with depression and discouragement because a battle is being waged requiring you to take up the full armor of God. Rather than succumbing to the lies of Satan, you need to stand firm in the grace of God and take hold of the “nowness” of the gospel that is your identity as adopted sons and daughters of God. Battling depression and discouragement is hard, but preaching the gospel, applying the truth of who you are in Christ, living in community, as well as knowing when and how you get discouraged are keys in the fight against discouragement and depression.

Whether you struggle with discouragement or depression a little bit or a lot, please don’t suffer in silence. There is hope and healing in Jesus, a Redeemer who is not far from you but near to you. Know that God loves you, sent his Son Jesus Christ to die, rise, ascend, and to serve as our High Priest and Intercessor. Furthermore, the Holy Spirit has called you to the community of saints to hear his Word, to call on his name, and to grow in his grace. Grow deep and wide in the gospel by standing firm in the gospel, not being afraid to be real and honest about your struggles. Moreover, always have a view to lean on your brother and sisters in Christ in time of need so that together we may show the world his unfailing and unchanging love that flows to God’s people from the throne of his grace.

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Dave Jenkins is a servant of Christ, husband to Sarah, writer, and Seattle sports fan. He serves as the Executive Director of Servant of Grace Ministries, the Executive Editor of Theology for Life magazine, the Book Promotions Specialist at Cross Focused Reviews and serves in a variety of capacities as a member of Ustick Baptist Church in Boise, Idaho.

Originally published at Servant of Grace. Used with Permission.

The Prodigal Dad

I was recently with a father who has been through the ringer with his son over the past few years. Suffice it to say that he has run into the wall just beyond the line of God’s sovereign will and the common grace of parenting. Or perhaps more illustrative, he’s living in the tension of “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.” This man is a great dad. His heart’s desire is that all of his children would, like the apostle Paul, “be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith.” (Philippians 3:9)

As we discussed God’s sovereignty, man’s depravity, and the life lessons therein, I was reminded about something my own dad has always told me. “Never be afraid to come home.”

Six simple words that meant so much more. They meant that I will always have a home under my father’s roof. They meant that my dad would be the first person I call (save perhaps my wife nowadays) if I found myself in real trouble. They meant that there is literally nothing I could do to lose my right to be a part of my father’s family. I always knew this. And so do the kids of my friend above.

But as I drove away from our meeting, a distant realization caught up with me all too quickly. It was as if I had walked out my front door into a maelstrom of reality dragging me deeper into its grasp. You see, as I have often written about, I have a great dad. And my friend is a great dad. But many in our own church cannot say the same thing.

The fatherhood deficiency in American society is nothing new. In fact, the worldwide phenomenon has been pandemic for years. I was recently in Nicaragua. They have the same problem. I’ve been to 3 or 4 other Latin American nations that are in the same boat. It’s not a new thing.

But the striking reality is this. As the trend grows, fewer and fewer children will hear the words “Never be afraid to come home.”

Now, why are those words so important?

Because of all the things they tell us. “Never be afraid to come home” is a clear picture of the reality that God searches for his prodigal children. It’s the declaration that there is literally nothing a child of God can do to lose the right to be called his son or daughter. It means that, for the Christian, our first response when we sin is to run to our Father, rather than away from him. And that is a true mark of maturity.

But I’m fearful that without our earthly dads to tell us that, we will have a difficult time learning it about our Heavenly Father. My dad—his actions, his love, and his words—were instrumental in my regeneration experience. And what’s more, my dad was a father figure for some of my closest friends when we all lived in a house together. They may not have called him dad. But a good father is a father in the same way a good athlete is an athlete. It just comes natural.

Don’t think that I’m attempting to take the supernatural away from God, as if he couldn’t possibly regenerate hearts to faith without the example of good earthly fathers. The truth is, God has ordained fatherhood to be a vivid illustration of his relationship to us. Why else would he call us sons and daughters?  So, for Christian fathers, the office of fatherhood carries a grace-filled weight that is unlike any other office that men can occupy.

But the problem is we have too many prodigal dads. Fulfilling their own destinies through achievement. Chasing a different woman every night at the local dive bar to escape chronic loneliness. Exploring “feminization” and “metrosexuality” simply because they are the latest trends on their news feeds. Searching for the kind of identity that is only to be found within the scope of God’s good design.

So, this is a plea to the prodigal dads. It’s not too late. My dad’s not perfect. Far from it. But he was, is, and will always be—first and foremost—my dad.

If God can heal the most fractured relationship that has ever existed—the one between you and him—he can surely reconcile your relationship with your wife and kids by his grace. He can certainly bring you under the fountain of joy that comes from renewal in Him. He can put you back together.

Prodigal dad, “Never be afraid to come home.”

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Alex Dean (@AlexMartinDean) is a pastor in Lakeland, Florida. Holding an undergraduate degree from Dallas Baptist University, Alex is currently completing his graduate work at Reformed Theological Seminary. His book, Gospel Regeneration: A story of death, life, and sleeping in a van, is available on Amazon, iBooks, and other online retailers. Follow his blog at www.GospelRegeneration.com and follow him on Twitter.

Used with permission. Originally posted at GospelRegeneration.com.

4 Benefits of Stories for Discipleship

Not everyone values good stories. Sometimes Christians can be the worst of all, afraid of being of the world. What we must remember is that everything we do is part of a liturgy we live in. If we are not intentionally discipling ourselves and others with the truths of God’s story then we will be discipled by other things—for good or bad. Everything you hear, see, taste, and touch is telling a story. Reading good stories is crucial to combating these destructive stories. Christians must wisely choose stories that will help them mature as disciples.

1. Stories help us shed the skin of our unbelief.

“We are narrative creatures, and we need narrative nourishment—narrative catechisms.” — N. D. Wilson

Stories in the most fundamental way remove the barrier of believing that the impossible could happen. We read of dragons, knights, wizards, looking-glasses and these stories help prepare our hearts to believe truths that could not be believed without them. God has placed in our hearts the creativity to create stories that reflect the big truths of the story he is writing. Without these smaller glimpses, we might hear his story and balk at the fantastical nature of Red Sea crossing, killing giants, controlling nations and kings, and a virgin birth, but with them we hear his story and shed the skin of our unbelief.

Perhaps you enjoy reading fiction and you’re a fan of Lee Childs’ Jack Reacher novels. I enjoy these books for many reasons, but partly because my gut wants to believe that someone will make the wrong in this world right. That someone out there will make sure those who have acted wickedly and grossly immoral will get their comeuppance. Jack does this in a limited way. He’s limited because he’s a human with his own sinful actions and his thoughts aren’t always pure. But reading these books helps me to shed my unbelief, namely that the wicked I see now will go unpunished. These stories make me hope for a final judgement. For Someone perfect, unlike Jack, to come to earth and make all things right once and for all.

2. Stories mature wonder, bringing doctrine to life.

“We are like astonishing tales because they touch the nerve of ancient instinct of astonishment.” — G. K. Chesterton

The book of Romans is masterpiece of logic and doctrine. Paul skillfully demonstrates his knowledge of Old Testament theology, the life of Jesus, and how it all connects for Christians who have been made alive. What I’m not saying here is that doctrine is boring. Romans in particular is one of my favorite books in Scripture. It’s a delight to read. But stories bring doctrine to life in a way that doctrine alone cannot. Stories create wonder and awe.

Paul understands this as he wrote Romans. His doctrine is attached back to the story of Israel—especially the Exodus—and what this means for Christians who have experienced this New Exodus from slavery to life. Also, a major theme in Romans is justification by faith and many have made the point (wrongly) that justification isn’t central to the Christian faith because Jesus never mentions it. However, what they miss is Jesus lives, walks, and breaths justification by faith. Jesus brings the doctrine to life—while Paul plumbs the story’s depth. Story and doctrine are protons and neutrons that make a complete atom. One without the other and you’ve got nothing.

3. Stories lay siege to our affections.

“We are essentially and ultimately desiring animals, which is simply to say that we are essentially and ultimately lovers. To be human is to love, and it is what we love that defines who are.” — James K. A. Smith

Stories have a way of grabbing our heads and our hearts. Suppose you were an atheists reading The Chronicles of Narnia and the crucial chapter is upon you. Aslan gives himself up for Edmund. He’s tied to the stone and wickedness and evil descend upon him. The darkness weighs in on the reader as well. In those short pages the reader is driven to grief and sadness, but Aslan doesn’t stay dead. He rises victoriously. Your heart will leap for joy as Aslan lives before your head realizes what your affections have been driven to. It could be days, months, or years. You may be minding your own business when a perfect stranger intersects with you and shares another story with you. “This Man died and rose from the dead,” she might say. For a second time your heart leaps for joy within you—even if for a moment. Why is that? Why did that happen? Because C. S. Lewis’ Aslan has already prepared your heart to hear the truth of the death, resurrection, and reign of Jesus Christ. Stories matter because they lay siege to our hearts and prepare our minds. They are a narrative catechism, as N. D. Wilson says, maturing our hearts and minds to love rightly.

4. Stories brighten our sense of imago Dei.

“We know God’s character through story.” — Peter Leithart

Ultimately stories brighten our sense of imago Dei. They remind us we were created by God and placed in a story. That story continues on today and we are part of it. As imago Dei, we are more aware of what’s happening around us when we realize this. We do not have a meaningless existence. We do not serve a utilitarian purpose. There is love, beauty, and truth in this story. We must pursue these things.

We also must create a story of our own. Some of us play our part by writing stories. Some play music, paint, engineer, farm, mother or father, or pick up trash. These are all beautiful because we are all imago Dei. Tolkien reminds us of this when he calls us “sub-creators” and Lewis when he says, “There are no ordinary people.” Consider the superhero genre and one of the major fixed pieces—the mask. It could be anyone. Any of us could have these powers and be extraordinary. It could be the geeky news reporter, the teenager living with his aunt, the reclusive billionaire, or the blind man. Stories brighten the sense of the divine in our hearts.

Stories should play a crucial role in discipleship. Choose wisely. Read broadly. Let the stories grab your heart as they form you into a more mature disciple of Jesus Christ.

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Mathew B. Sims is the Editor-in-Chief at Exercise.com and has authored, edited, and contributed to several books including A Household Gospel, We Believe: Creeds, Confessions, & Catechisms for Worship, A Guide for Advent, Make, Mature, Multiply, and A Guide for Holy Week. Mathew, LeAnn (his wife), and his daughters Claire, Maddy, and Adele live in Taylors, SC at the foot of the Blue Ridge Mountains with their Airdale Terrier. They attend Downtown Presbyterian Church (PCA). Visit MathewBryanSims.com!

Reigning with Christ on Daily Mission

To say that the heart of the gospel is Christ crucified would not be wrong (1 Cor. 1:23; Gal 6:14). To say that the heart of the gospel is the resurrection of Christ would not be wrong either, for by it our justification comes (Rom. 4:25; cf. 1 Tim. 3:16). To say that the heart of the gospel is the ascension of Christ would not be wrong, but you may receive a funny stare from a confused onlooker. The reason, of course, is that the ascension of Christ is an often overlooked element of the universally huge, wonderfully true, gospel of the Kingdom of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Perhaps you’ve glossed over this verse before: “And when [Jesus] had said these things, as [the disciples] were looking on, he was lifted up, and a cloud took him out of their sight” (Acts 1:9). To give another perspective on this event, Mark shares that, “The Lord Jesus, after he had spoken to [the disciples], was taken up into heaven and sat down at the right hand of God” (Mk. 16:19).

The anticipation of the Old Testament, as well as the resounding message of the New Testament, is that Christ is King. This is not an empty saying. It means something. The writer of Hebrews says that, “When Christ had offered for all time a single sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God, waiting from that time until his enemies should be made a footstool for his feet” (Heb. 10:12-13). The verse alluded to here in Hebrews is found in Psalm 110 (which just so happens to be the most quoted Psalm in the New Testament!). Jesus uses the same verse to vindicate his ministry, claiming that David was writing about him (Matt. 22:41-46).

The Exalted King in the Old Testament

The theme of an exalted King to come is all over the Old Testament. Isaiah says that this King’s “temple” will be established “as the highest of the mountains; and shall be lifted above the hills; and all nations will flow to it” (2:2). Later Isaiah says that this son would be given and “the government shall be on his shoulder… Of the increase of his government and of peace there will be no end” (9:6, 7). Fast forward to the time of the Babylonian exile and we find Daniel interpreting King Nebuchadnezzar’s dream. The dream showed a stone that struck the feet of the statue which symbolized the coming nations of Babylon, Persia, Greece, and Rome. The kingdom “stone” broke the entire statue so “not a trace of [the kingdoms] could be found” (Dan. 2:35). The stone grew into a great mountain that would fill the earth. Jump over to Daniel 7 and we see the vision of the son of man who comes up to the Ancient of Days and “to him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve him; his dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and his kingdom one that shall not be destroyed” (Dan. 7:14).

Verses like these are what we find as the back story to Christ’s ministry on earth, and the overwhelming consensus of the New Testament writers is that all of this is now true. Peter affirms it an Acts 2, and the rest of the Bible sets its context inside the end of the ages (1 Cor. 10:11) that happened in A.D. 70 with the destruction of the Temple. Because the Old Covenant has passed away, the New Covenant has come, and with it her newly crowned King. The millennial reign of Christ as King is now. Jesus has all authority on heaven and on earth (Matt. 28:18).

Now, lest we see this as irrelevant for us who serve as God’s ambassadors and vice-regents, pay close attention to what Paul says in Ephesians as he affirms what has just been laid out above: “[God] worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places” (1:20). Notice the connection: Resurrection, then Kingdom. The resurrection of Christ is intimately connected to the ascension of Christ and both serve as events confirming that the kingdom of God has indeed come.

But please do not miss what happens next, because this is crucial for the Christian and his implementation of the Kingdom of God in his life. Paul uses nearly the same language to describe our union with Christ: “[God] raised us up with [Jesus] and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus” (Eph. 2:6). The context of Ephesians 2:1-5 has to do with resurrection language that is employed when describing our salvation. We were dead, but God made us alive. And not only did he make us alive, we are now reigning with Christ in his perfect Kingdom.

Seated with the King

Where have we heard that before? You guessed it: Revelation 20. When you participate in the first resurrection (the rebirth; cf. Jn. 5:25), you are blessed because death has no power anymore—it has been broken by Jesus’ death. Not only that, you reign with Christ. You have been (past tense) seated with the King.

This is where you and I come in. It is time we see our lawn mowing, dish washing, gardening, and work as Kingdom business. I heard a pastor recently describe some of his extracurricular activities as having “nothing to do with the Kingdom.” I beg to differ. Whatever you do, do it for God’s glory because God’s glory is now on full display (1 Cor. 10:31). It will fill the earth (Is. 11:9). All of this is about dominion. And dominion is about man ruling the earth on behalf of Christ. We seek justice in the Church, the Family, and the State. We labor not just for souls to be saved, but for society to be transformed. Certainly this cannot happen apart from the regenerating work of the Holy Spirit in the souls of men, but the Kingdom truly affects everything. When Christ issued his decree as the King of the Universe, it was a decree to make disciples. What is a disciple? Some who is baptized (a part of the visible Church) and obedient to the word of God. (That’s why Jesus told us to teach the nations to observe everything that he commanded).

To the stay-at-home-so-you-can-build-a-home mom: diapers are about the Kingdom (for how else are we to leave a legacy for generations to follow?). Fathers: your work to provide for your family absolutely matters. It matters that you contribute to society with the sweat of your brow. Parents: train up your children in the knowledge of God. Farm the land; build business and do economics; do accounting to the glory of God. Why? Because you reign with Christ. And Christ is in the process of putting all his enemies under his feet (1 Cor. 15:25). The “subdue the earth” command Adam forfeited, the Second Adam recovered. That’s why the ascension of Christ matters. That’s why you matter.

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Rev. Jason M. Garwood (M.Div., Th.D.) serves as Lead Pastor of Colwood Church in Caro, MI. Jason and his wife Mary have three children, Elijah, Avery and Nathan. He blogs at www.jasongarwood.com. Connect with him on Twitter: @jasongarwood.

5 Lessons from C. S. Lewis’ Grief Observed

“Cancer, and cancer, and cancer. My mother, my father, my wife. I wonder who is next in the queue.” —C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

I never wanted to have this in common with C.S. Lewis. I never wanted to major in suffering.

Yet I am here, and she is there. She is resplendent in memorandum. . . and I cannot write fast enough. And I am left holding a copy of C.S. Lewis’ A Grief Observed. As Lewis observes his particular grief, I too observe my own. C.S. Lewis got it.

I would rather have other things in common with the man. I would have much rather been an “Inkling”—instead we are widowers observing grief.

I believe Lewis understood that one cannot simply skirt grief. Not without consequences anyway. Grief cannot be skipped over as one would skip over the fast kid in a game of “Duck, Duck, Goose.” No, rather, it seems as though grief is such-a-one whom demands to have a day of reckoning, be it now, be it later, it matters not so much. Be that as it may, it almost behooves the mourner to ride directly through the tempest of grief; keep on pedaling. Lewis himself writes, “Aren’t all these notes the senseless writhings of a man who won’t accept the fact that there is nothing we can do with suffering except to suffer it?” (33).

I started this short book several weary years ago. I had started a book club at church and chose C.S. Lewis’ A Grief Observed because I wanted my people to walk the valley of the shadow of death before death rapped at their doors. My Resplendent Bride was diagnosed with cancer before we finished chapter 2. Over the next twenty months, I would pick up this slender book of terror and read a paragraph or two, only to set it down again because I never wanted to understand what this man was writing about, and the possibility of understanding ebbed and flowed as that fox cancer raged and retreated, raged and retreated.

The Lord took her home on the third day of May. Perhaps God told her nothing would ever hurt her again. I do not know all the words he speaks to new arrivals, but I do take solace in the truth that nothing will ever hurt her again. Lewis writes, “I had my miseries, not hers; she had hers, not mine. The end of hers would be the coming-of-age-of mine. ” (13).

The gospel of Jesus Christ has sustained, maintained, and supported me all this time.  My solace is in his truth.

But it is farce to claim hope in Christ makes one immune to the sheer pain of life under the sun.  I have not found hope in Christ to be mutually exclusive to the feeling of bereavement.

As spring bloomed outside The Hermitage, winter set in inside.

The lingering challenge for the widower is to somehow fill the void left by the dissolution of all the loving, all the care-taking, and the family unit itself.

So it was that I once again picked up this slender volume, and it was there within the pages of A Grief Observed that I was surprised to find a friend in C.S. Lewis.

He gets it.

Few do, and for that I am thankful.

I have found C.S. Lewis’ A Grief Observed to be helpful to the widow or widower in five ways.

1. In  A Grief Observed, C. S. Lewis does not make a false dichotomy between hope in Christ and mourning over searing loss.

Lewis accomplishes this feat by allowing heavy sorrow to hang on his pages longer than others dare. Lewis does not seem to be in any hurry to provide the “Sunday School” answer so many follow up their condolences with. Some folks are born with Congenital Insensitivity To Pain, a condition wherein one cannot feel pain. This is a troubling ailment because our bodies warn us that things have gone awry such as “You stepped on a hornet’s nest” or, “The Sun is burning away your epidermis” or, “This machine you paid to be baked in is burning away your epidermis” through the sensation of pain.

Now, how shall the slow rending of the one flesh once again in two not hurt (Gen. 2:24)? Widowerhood is not the “conscious uncoupling” actress Gwyneth Paltrow euphemistically described her recent divorce as.

To be widowed is to be torn asunder. Sometimes the hurting need to hurt.

2.  A Grief Observed, seeks to answer the question, “Can God still be good when He hurts us so?”

My family was dissolved by death.  God is sovereign over both life and death.  Open Theists as well as some other theological traditions will not be too keen on this truth, but the Bible is.

Psalm 139:16 states, “Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them.”

Ecclesiastes 7:17 and 3:1-2 indicate that there are times appointed for all to live and die.  If so, then surely it is God who is the divine scheduler?

And shall we forget that it was God who drove and barred man from the tree of life growing in the Garden of Eden lest man steal immortality just as he had stolen knowledge?

Genesis 3:22-23

Then the LORD God said, ”Behold, the man has become like one of us in knowing good and evil. Now, lest he reach out his hand and take also of the tree of life and eat, and live forever– “therefore the LORD God sent him out from the garden of Eden to work the ground from which he was taken. He drove out the man, and at the east of the garden of Eden he placed the cherubim and a flaming sword that turned every way to guard the way to the tree of life.”

The New Testament informs us all flesh is destined to die someday:

Matthew 4:16, “The people dwelling in darkness have seen a great light, and for those dwelling in the region and shadow of death, on them a light has dawned.”

The author of Hebrews argues that death is “appointed for man” (9:27).

So it is, and so it shall always be: God is Lord over both thanatos and zoe. Herein lies the rub:

• God has dissolved my family by death.
• The ruin of that which remains are great.
• And, I love him.

Lewis writes, “Is it rational to believe in a bad God?  Anyway, in a God so bad as all that?  The Cosmic Sadist, the spiteful imbecile?  I think it is, if nothing else, too anthropomorphic” (30).

Lewis goes on to write,

Feelings, and feelings, and feelings.  Let me try thinking instead.  From the rational point of view, what new factor has H.’s death introduced into the problem of the universe?  What grounds has it given me for doubting all that I believe?  I knew already that these things, and worse, happened daily.  I would have said that I had taken them into account.  I had been warned—I had warned myself—not to reckon on worldly happiness.  We were even promised sufferings.  They were part of the programme.  We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn, and I accepted it.  I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for.  Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not in imagination.  Yes; but shout it, for a sane man, make quite such a difference as this?  No.  and it wouldn’t for a man whose faith had been real faith and whose concern for other people’s sorrows had been real concern.  The case is too plain.  If my house has collapsed at one blow, that is because it was a house of cards.  The faith which ‘took these things into account was not faith but imagination.  The taking them into account was not real sympathy.  If I had really cared, as I thought I did, about the sorrows of the world, I should not have been so overwhelmed when my own sorrow came”  (36-37).

The question Lewis is wrestling with is whether God is a divine veterinarian or a divine vivisector (in other words one whose cutting is aimed to heal, or one whose cutting is motivated by sadism)?

“And I must surely admit — H. would have forced me to admit is a few passes — that, if my house was a house of cards, the sooner it was knocked down the better.  And only suffering could do it.  But then the Cosmic Sadist and Eternal vivisector becomes an unnecessary hypothesis” (38).

“Of course the cat will growl and spit at the operator and bit him if she can.  But the real question is whether he is a vet or a vivisector.  Her bad language throws no light on it one way or another.  and I can believe He is a vet when I think of my own suffering” (40).

Lewis believed that a good God only hurts for a greater good in the Christian’s life. This notion frees the Christian from having to use lame circular arguments to defend God from that which is plain. God is sovereign. God is good. I hurt. All three are true.

3. In  A Grief Observed, C. S. Lewis rightly observes that grief can lead to laziness.

Lewis writes,

“And no one ever told me about the laziness of grief.  Except at my job — where the machine seems to run on much as usual — I loathe the slightest effort. Not only writing but even reading a letter is too much. Even shaving. What does it matter now whether my cheek is rough or smooth? They say an unhappy man wants distractions — something to take him out of himself. Only as a dog — tired man wants an extra blanket on a cold night; he’d rather lie there shivering than get up and find one. It’s easy to see why the lonely become untidy, finally, dirty and disgusting” (5).

Lewis’ observation on this point is useful for the widow/widower in that knowing and naming the temptation helps us to not only fight the temptation but to recognize it as it slowly encroaches upon us.

Those of us in bereavement must continue to take care of ourselves. We must try to eat right, exercise, keep house, do laundry, and for the sake of our fellow man, shower. We must continue to stimulate our minds even though it hurts to not be able to share new things with our cherished one. We must endeavor by God’s grace to work at our vocation and hobbies, because whether we find the joy in it all at the moment: we still live.

Work is the antidote to the temptation to amuse ourselves with the specter of time travel as remedy to regret. There is no redemption in regret.

4. In  A Grief Observed, C. S. Lewis warns the widow or widower that they may be treated as the harbinger of death.

“An odd byproduct of my loss is that I’m aware of being an embarrassment to everyone I meet. At work, at the club, in the street, I see people, as they approach me, trying to make up their minds whether they’ll ‘say something about it’ or not.  I hate it if they do, and if they don’t. Some funk it altogether. R. has been avoiding me for a week. I like best the well brought-up young men, almost boys, who walk up to me as if I were a dentist, turn very red, get it over, and then edge away to the bar as quickly as they decently can. Perhaps the bereaved ought to be isolated in special settlements like lepers. To some I’m worse than an embarrassment. I am a death’s head. Whenever I meet a happily married pair I can feel them both thinking, ‘One or the other of us must some day be as he is now’” (10-11).

Lewis’ words ring true.

• The widow/widower, especially young ones, remind all the marrieds of the dread truth that there is a 50% chance that this, all this, is coming their way, someday, sooner or later.
• Nobody knows what to say. The friend does not know. The bereaved does not know.

Furthermore, in the absence of anything to say the things which are said tend to get under the widower’s skin.

People will ask variations of, “How you holding up?” or, “How are you doing?” and let us know forget, “How is your heart?”

Muscle, grit, and pumping are certainly not acceptable answers, but regardless of the answer there are those who are never satisfied that your answers are truthful unless you cry all over them.

Not likely.

The widower suddenly finds himself in a situation where every person with the capability to pass wind through their vocal cords in his general vicinity now places themselves in a position of authority over him for his own good. If a question is asked it must be answered to any and all’s satisfaction, or he shall risk a raised eye brow and the ever quizzical, “How are you really doing?”

Everyone is Barbara Walters.

Shall everyone presume to be both inquisitor and confessor?

And all this in the name of “community”?

Widower. . . They may love you, and it is a terrible fate to love someone who is hurt and to have nothing to say by way of making the dreadful affair better. Widower, I know it is tedium because you don’t know what to say either. But grief is no excuse to be a tool. Nor is grief an excuse to be an over analytical fool. This isn’t Dawson’s Creek. . . and your friends didn’t kill her. They’re just trying to help.

Those who are suffering from grief must be aware that they may be much more easily annoyed than they once were. As the movie Swing Kids says, “Put your glasses on.” Your friends simply wish to help, and they are suffering too: for they cannot help you, and they probably love whomever you lost as well.

5. In  A Grief Observed, C. S. Lewis takes Heaven back from the family reunion and returns it to the Glory of God.

Heaven does not primarily exist for me to see my Resplendent Bride again. Everything, and I mean everything in me wants to see Danielle again. It is a visceral need. A couple of days ago I teared up as I brought her pills to the pharmacy for disposal. I miss her so much that I didn’t even want to be parted with her pills.

Yes, I am damaged in every which way.

But, heaven is about Jesus.

Heaven is about the glory of God.

Anything less is idolatry.

From the talk I hear at funerals I am fearful that people are giving God lip service in order to get what they want from him, namely, an eternal family reunion.

Almost as though we would approach God and use his throne like a friend’s lake house. “Hello there! God, we’d like to use your house for this thing. . . you’re. . . not going to be there, right?” Lewis writes,

“Am I, for instance, just sidling back to God because I know that if there’s any road to H., it runs through Him?  But then of course I know perfectly well that He can’t be used as a road.  If you’re approaching Him not as the goal but as a road, not as the end but as a means, you’re not really approaching Him at all.  That’s what was really wrong with all those popular pictures of happy reunions ‘on the further shore’; not the simple-minded and very earthly images, but the fact that they make an End of what we can get only as a by-product of the true End” (68).

Lewis goes on to write something that is helpful for the widows and widowers who have read Matthew 22:30, “For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.”

“Heaven will solve our problems, but not, I think, by showing us subtle reconciliations between all our apparently contradictory notions. The notions will all be knocked from under our feet.  We shall see that there never was any problem” (71).

So say we all.

I recommend A Grief Observed for the bereaved, as well as those who have a 50/50 shot of standing in my ever so scuffed dress shoes.

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Evan Welcher is senior pastor of First Christian Church in Glenwood, Iowa. Husband of the lovely Danielle. Evan graduated with a B.S. in Bible from Emmaus Bible College in 2005. His goal in ministry is to stir up love for Jesus Christ by the giving of great care and fidelity to the teaching of the Scriptures. He blogs at EvanWelcher.com. Follow him on Twitter: @EvanWelcher

Originally published at EvanWelcher.com. Used with permission.

Cultivating Wonder in Children

Success by Religious Conformity

It was one of those moments when I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I opted to just shrink lower into our second-row pew, stifle my giggles, and thank God for my seven-year-old son and all his glorious honesty.

My husband pastors a rural church in SW Virginia; and while we do our best to keep our kids out of the fishbowl, we do expect them to participate in the full-scope of congregational life. This includes our mid-week Bible study. This isn’t usually a problem, but like all of us, there are days when our children would rather stay home. Sometimes they’re tired, busy doing other things, or in the case of my seven-year-old son, simply finds his Legos more interesting than sitting still for an hour.

On this particular Wednesday night, my husband and I had dealt with the standard objections over dinner, and by 7:05, everyone was safely ensconced in our pew with our heads bowed. The head deacon was opening the service with prayer as only a head deacon from a rural Baptist church can when about half way through, he asked God to touch the hearts of “those who could have come tonight, but chose not to.” Not missing a beat, my son piped up, “Well, I didn’t want to come, but I HAD to.”

My son’s resistance to church is not the only discipleship hurdle we face as parents. It is easily matched by his older sister’s recent acknowledgment that she finds God’s eternality “weird” and by the fact that their five-year-old brother regularly asks to pray at meal time for the sole purpose of controlling the length of the prayer. (“Dear-God-Thank-you-for-this-food-help-us-to love-each-other-Amen.”) If parenting success is measured by religious conformity, we’re batting 0 for 3 here.

Discipleship Through Fear

These kinds of situations have the potential to worry Christian parents who desire to pass their faith on to their children. With reports of widespread Millennial angst and stories of apologists’ daughters rejecting Christianity, it easy to fear our children will not come to a personal relationship with Christ. It’s even easier to respond out of that fear by simply doubling our efforts to force faith into them through more catechism, more Bible memory, more “church.”

Part of the reason we do this is because we tend to believe discipleship happens through the accumulation of religious knowledge. A quick Google search for “children’s discipleship” brings back resource after resource—everything from catechisms to Bible memory systems to pint-sized devotional books–all promising to produce faith in the next generation of believers. What I rarely hear discussed is the necessity of discipling our children through “natural revelation.” When theologians use the term “natural revelation,” they are referring to what God has revealed about himself through the world around us. “Specific revelation,” on the other hand, is what God has revealed about himself through the Scripture.

And while I believe Scripture is essential to the process of belief, Scripture was never intended to be engaged in a vacuum. Instead, faith happens as the Holy Spirit impresses the truth of God’s Word (specific revelation) onto a heart that has been primed to accept it by experiencing the truth of God in the world around it (natural revelation). Like a pair of chopsticks, the two must work together.

The Apostle Paul understood this and it’s precisely why in Acts 17—that famous Mars Hill sermon—he begins by appealing to what the Athenians already knew through their experience of the world. They already believed in some “unknown God” because they could see his works both in them and around them. Most of us understand the importance of this approach in adult evangelism; we craft winsome arguments and appeal to the nature of the cosmos and the intrinsic code of right and wrong that seems to be written on every human heart. What fewer of us recognize is that we must evangelize and disciple our children in this exact same way. We must evangelize and disciple our children through wonder as much as through catechism.

Wonder as Much as Catechisms

In Orthodoxy, G. K. Chesterton, that great British philosopher of the last century, writes that he gained his understanding of the world as a child:

“My first and last philosophy, that which I believe in with unbroken certainty, I learnt in the nursery . . . a certain way of looking at life, which was created in me by the fairy tales, but has since been meekly ratified by mere facts.”

It is this “certain way of looking at life” that many Christian parents neglect—or perhaps have never even acquired for themselves. We are not merely stuffing our children’s heads with facts; we are shaping hearts to believe that certain realities are true so that when they do finally encounter the facts essential to faith, they will already have hearts that can recognize them. When they finally memorize “In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth,” it will find lodging because they have already gazed up into this same heaven and marveled at its brilliant stars; and they have already let the sand from this same earth slip through their chubby fingers.

So that in the end, they don’t believe there is a Creator simply because Genesis 1 tells them so; they believe there is a Creator because they have seen his Creation. 


As you go about discipling your children, as you teach them their Bible verses and correct them when they disobey, do not neglect the sacred discipline of awe. Take them to the mountains to walk forest trails in search of the millipedes and butterflies that are the works of his hands. Take them to the seashore to be knocked over by the power of a wave so that one day they’ll know how to be knocked over by power of God. Take them to the art museum to thrill at colors and shapes and textures whose beauty can only be explained by the One who is Beauty himself. Take them to the cities to crane their necks to the see the tops of sky scrapers and shiver at God’s miracle of physics that keeps them from tumbling down.

And then take them to church.

Take them to church to bow their heads and receive the Word that gives them the ability to know the God behind all these wonders in a personal way. Take them to church to let the joy of their little hearts overflow in worship of the One through whom all these things consist. And take them to church, so that in the midst of other worshipers, in the midst of other image bearers, they too will be able to find their place in the great, wide world he has made.

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Hannah Anderson lives in the hauntingly beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. She spends her days working beside her husband in rural ministry, caring for their three young children, and scratching out odd moments to write. In those in-between moments, she contributes to a variety of Christian publications and is the author of Made for More: An Invitation to Live in God’s Image (Moody, 2014). You can connect with her at her blog Sometimes a Light and on Twitter @sometimesalight.

Men, Don’t Just Talk the Talk

If you were to read the hobbies section on my Facebook, you would notice I am into reading, blogging, and running. I do all those things almost every week. If you keep reading, however, you will notice it also says I like to work out, rock climb, and surf. While those things are listed, if I am honest, I haven’t done any of those activities in quite a while. Now, I can talk to you for hours about each of them. I know the lingo, but I don’t actually climb, surf, or workout anymore. So while I can talk the talk, I am not walking the walk.

Talking the Talk Without Walking the Walk

Often times a lot of churchgoers know how to talk the talk, but don’t walk the walk—especially those who have been around church for any length of time. They can talk all about the Bible and “churchy things” because they have been around it for most of their lives. However, when it comes to obeying all of Jesus’ commands (Matt. 28:20) they don’t do it. They aren’t walking the walk. Instead, they are just talking the talk.

Disciples of Jesus—those who have been regenerated by the Spirit, repented of their sins, and placed their faith in Jesus—not only talk about Scripture, they also allow it to guide their lives. They walk the walk.

Walking the walk is an everyday activity that involves us applying God’s Word to every area of our life. Family, work, play, and community involvement should all be informed by God’s Word. One major area is our families. God commands men to lead their families. Specifically, the husband is to be the leader and shepherd of their family flock.

Family Shepherding

Since we are to walk as Jesus walked, imitating him in all things, it is only right we look to Jesus for the “how to” of family shepherding (1 Jn. 2:6, Eph. 5:1, 1 Cor. 11:1). Let me offer you a few guiding principles to get you started.

First, we must know those we are shepherding. In John 10:14, Jesus tells us he is the Good Shepherd. After which, he tells us what the Good Shepherd does, namely, he knows his own.

Applying Jesus’ idea of the Good Shepherd to our own Christian walk means we have to know our families. The best way to get to know our family is to spend time with them. Family time doesn’t just occur because we are in the same room with them. It’s more involved than just being in close proximity. It requires us to engage them in conversation. Conversation that gets to know the heart of your family in an effort to draw out their interests, fears, and concerns. We cannot effectively draw out the hearts of our family if they have to compete with the television, Facebook, or our iPhones, so we have to disengage from our technology in order to engage with our family.

Second, we must protect our families from spiritual danger. Jesus tells us the Good Shepherd is willing to lay down his life for his sheep in order to protect them (Jn. 10:11-13). If we are going to walk in the footsteps of Jesus, we must do the same.

In order to protect our family, we have to know their world. We have to be aware of what they are watching, reading, and their friends. Also, we must understand the culture in which they live and know how to combat its worldview with the gospel.

Lastly, we must instruct our families. During his earthly ministry, Jesus intimately instructed his disciples, teaching them how to both read and understand Scripture (Acts 1:3). We must do the same.

There is no one size fits all way to instruct our families. Some may choose nightly family devotions, other families may benefit from weekly Bible studies, and still others from discussing that weeks sermon over lunch. The method will differ from family to family, but the principle remains the same—men, who walk in Jesus’ footsteps, instruct their families in the Lord.

You see, being a believer means more than posting spiritual quotes or Bible verses to Facebook, knowing the lingo, or making a claim of faith. Being a believer means we live according to God’s will; it means we walk the walk. So it doesn’t matter what you say. What matters is what you do.

Gospel Change Causes Us To Walk the Walk

Now, I am not trying to frustrate you by telling you you have to work harder or that you have to produce change on your own. Change doesn’t occur solely through our effort. Instead change primarily occurs through the gospel. When the gospel pierces our heart of stone, it does something we could never do. It causes our heart—our will, desires, and wants to change. It’s that change which is necessary for us to walk the walk.

However, gospel change doesn’t mean all we have to do is believe and all of a sudden we are perfectly walking as Jesus walked. We must still put forth effort. We must still work out our salvation with fear and trembling (Phil. 2:12) Even so, we can be assured that while we work, God is working in us, changing our will to be more in line with his (Phil. 2:13).

Since God changes us, we know change is possible. In fact, we will be changed into the restored image of Christ (1 Cor. 13:12). Put another way: if we are disciples, there is no way we won’t change to live more inline with God’s will throughout our Christian walk. We may hit some valleys along the way, but we will always be moving up the mountain. Since that is true, men, walk the walk, don't just talk the talk.

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Casey Lewis currently serves as the Senior Pastor of Sycamore Baptist Church in Decatur, TX. He is a graduate of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, a husband, father, and a follower of Jesus Christ . He currently blogs at ChristianityMatters.com. Follow him on twitter: @caseylewis33