Leading the Misfits and the Moles

Let’s face it, leading is very difficult. Why? Because you are effectively trying to herd cats. It can get crazy. You have to deal with different maturity levels, different backgrounds, different demographics, and even different motives and aspirations. When I first started leading, I figured that everyone desired to be a leader someday, and that they had the same goals as the one that they were following. Wow, after years of extensive study (by that I mean, after years of tearing my hair out and cussing people out under my breath), I have found that when we look at Jesus and how he led and who he led, we find some very interesting groups of people, and he definitely interacted very differently with each group. Now, anytime you write something like this, you have to generalize and you have to characterize. Don’t take this article as the end all or as a way to then characterize automatically everyone you are leading. This is meant as simply a summation of what I read in the Scriptures and what I have found in leading others on God’s mission.

So, who do we find as we look at the life and ministry of Jesus? We find these types of people:

1. Masses
2. Misfits
3. Managers
4. Moles
5. Apprentices (yeah, I know, it’s not an M word…)

The Masses

When we see Jesus leading, we see that many followed him. Crowds upon crowds of people would follow him around to see what they could get out of him. Jesus would say some pretty rough things to them, whether it was to eat his flesh or drink his blood to the harsh words he spoke to rich young ruler and the Canaanite woman seeking to have her daughter healed. He would teach them the ways of his Father and he definitely showed them what it looked like to be one of his disciples, but you’ll notice that none of them were in his close realm of friendship or discipleship. These people didn’t help make the plans for the next journey or “get a vote” on what or where to go next. These people are curious, and Jesus allowed them to be.

Many times we want to please the masses, thinking that is the way to draw more people in. Jesus didn’t do this. Jesus would teach and be on his way, and then out of the masses those that took him serious would then follow him or come to him in private and Jesus would then engage even further with them. Think of Zacchaeus. You know, the wee little man? He was part of the masses, but Jesus saw something in his faith of climbing the tree to just get a glimpse of Jesus that caused Jesus to go deeper with him in relationship (Luke 19:1-10). Know that in the masses, there may be many who will go deeper, but do not try and conform your vision or message to convert all of them to the ways of Jesus… not even Jesus did that.

Many times we want to please the masses, thinking that is the way to draw more people in. Jesus didn’t do this.

The Misfits

The misfits are people who don’t fit into the mold as others do. In many ways, you are not sure what to do with them, but they keep showing up and they keep following in the ways of Jesus. Jesus had many of these in his time. He had the demon possessed man that he sent the Legion of demons into the pigs and told him to go back to his town to tell them what happened (Mark 5:1-20). He had the blind man in John 9 that had enough faith to go and tell what happened to the religious leaders. And of course, Zacchaeus would also fit into this category.

Know that you will run into these types all the time. They don’t fit the normal mold that you are used to leading. It could be their personality type, or it could be their beliefs. We’ve had many people in our missional communities over the years that didn’t fully believe in all the “tenants of Christianity,” but followed in the ways of Jesus more closely than any Christian I had come across. Don’t discourage these people, but foster them and help them grow in that understanding of who God is and what he’s done. The misfits were ones that Jesus took great care of and desired them to know his Father. For too long, we’ve been uncomfortable with leading these types of people, but know that God desires them among his flock, even if they believe that karma is legit and unicorns are real.

The misfits were ones that Jesus took great care of and desired them to know his Father.

The Managers

I believe that Jesus had at least nine managers among him. They did what they were told, followed Jesus where he was going and loved Jesus until the end (besides one). These were the nine apostles apart from Peter, James and John. Now, I can’t tell you exactly why these nine were different than the three.  But, we definitely see that Jesus’ relationship with the three - Peter, James and John - was quite different than the nine (which will be explained further in the article). Jesus entrusted the nine with a ton, but probably knew that their leadership capabilities were more than likely going to be in a smaller setting and done with very little vision or initiative. He needed to do a lot of hand-holding with their leadership, but he knew that if he laid out the plans and purpose, they would be very good with following through. Whether it was feeding the crowds or coming alongside him even after some tough conversations and teachings. They weren’t going anywhere, they loved him deeply.

We all lead these types of people. They are great at running tasks, small groups, or missional communities. But, to try and get them to take that next step of visionary leadership and leading leaders is just too much for them. For too long, we’ve been trying to make managers a leader among leaders. We then get frustrated when they don’t come through, or things become stagnant in their growth or in their groups. But, this is how God has made them and where their capacity lies. This is a huge step for you as a leader, to know the difference between a manager and an apprentice. Who is going to merely carry out an assignment and who is going to catalyze an assignment? Big difference. This will not only help managers function in the ways that God has made them, which will in turn be freeing for them, but it will stop your frustration with why they can’t get to that next level.

The Moles

Some moles are wolves, but not all of them, so I won’t use that term to classify a whole “class” of people. The moles seem to be going along just fine for the most part. But, they usually don’t speak up, or they don’t buy into the vision and end up being like rocks in your shoe. Jesus had moles all around him. He had some that were wolves and some that were merely going to slow down his mission to show off his Father. Think of it:

Jesus had the rich young ruler that didn’t want to fully follow him, so Jesus let him go instead of trying to convince him to stay (Mark 10:17-27).

Jesus had one who asked to go and bury his father and yet another that asked to go say goodbye to his family (Luke 9:57-62).

Not only this, but Jesus also had moles that were wolves. Of course, there was Judas. There were also the Pharisees, Sadducees, Scribes who were asking questions to try and throw him and his disciples off their plan to make disciples.

The point is that moles will never follow you where you are going. They always have excuses or bring up questions that sound legit if you took each one by themselves, but when added up, only equal a stagnant self-focused individual that will never actually follow your leadership.

They need to be let go. You have to prune these branches. Too many allow these types of people hang around and call it “grace,” when in reality it’s bad leadership and is holding back the misfits, the masses, and the managers from actually following you as you follow Jesus and his mission. Jesus only allowed Judas to stick around because he had a specific plan in place for him, but with all other moles, he sharply addresses and moves on without them.

Now, don’t automatically label someone as a mole, but when someone’s actions have a pattern of this type of behavior, the worst thing you can do is keep them around as they only hinder you and everyone else from fulfilling the mission.

Just look at Jesus. He knew men’s hearts, so he could make this judgment far quicker than we can. But he wouldn’t even allow these types of people to be close to him or his disciples. That says a lot.

The Apprentices

The apprentices are a little different than the rest. They not only get the mission and vision, but they can see and lead five steps down the line. Jesus had three of these: Peter, James and John. These three were the ones that were going to lead the charge when Jesus was gone. They were virtually taking the place of Jesus. You’ll notice that they aren’t perfect; Peter says many things we cringe at, and James and John desire to destroy people with fire from heaven (Luke 9:54). Jesus doesn’t use this against them, but finds them to be men of zeal and passion for him and his mission. He sees them, not as merely managers, but as ones that will take his place. He spends extra time with them to teach them and guide them in his ways, even taking them up to see his transfiguration. These were men who he was training in all of his ways, allowing them to speak into situations and aid the people so that they could understand what he was about.

We have the same in our communities. They are humble and want to learn and want to lead without titles. They have great ideas and seem to always see down the road and how things will affect people in ways we haven’t thought about. These are the people we need to spend the most time with. These are the future leaders that will continue to lead, not in a way a manager will, but will lead with big vision and lead the charge, instead of just taking orders. Dig deep with these people as much as possible. Spend time with them that others won’t get to with you, not because you are picking favorites, but because you know that they are going to be a leader or leaders and need that extra time to understand what it looks like.

Under your wing, these leaders will be the ones who continue to properly handle the masses, the misfits, the managers, the moles, and the new apprentices long after you’re gone. In my opinion, this is the best way to multiply leaders and, ultimately, to multiply disciples. And that’s what we’re here for, right?

Conclusion

What you’ll see about Jesus is that he allowed every one of these types of people to hear and observe his message and life. He didn’t leave people out, but he also didn’t treat them all the same. He used wisdom to understand who to let “in” and who to let go, who to dig deeper with and who to keep at a distance. It wasn’t because Jesus was a jerk, it was because Jesus had a mission.

What you’ll see about Jesus is that he allowed every one of these types of people to hear and observe his message and life.

The same is said for us. Jesus left us with his mission to make disciples. Knowing where people are on their journey will help you identify how to lead them and who to offer more of your time. This doesn’t mean that if someone is a misfit or a manager that someday they won’t be an apprentice; treat it as though it could happen and pray for the Spirit’s leading. It also doesn’t mean that God won’t change the heart of the mole. Saul became Paul.

I hope here to offer my experience, and to aid your understanding in who you are leading and how Jesus led. Let this be just a taster of your study and understanding of leading others in their journey of following Jesus.

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Seth McBee is the adopted son of God, husband of one wife, and father of three. He’s a graduate of Seattle Pacific University with a finance degree. By trade. Seth is an investment portfolio manager, serving as President of McBee Advisors, Inc. He is also a MC leader/trainer/coach and executive team member of the GCM Collective. Seth currently lives in Phoenix, AZ with his wife Stacy and their three children: Caleb, Coleman, and Madelynn. He is also the artist and co-author of the wildly popular (and free!) eBook, Be The Church: Discipleship & Mission Made Simple. Twitter: @sdmcbee.

6 Tips for Shepherding Your Small Group

Growing up in church, I have been in my fair share of small groups. Some good, some not so good. I’ve been in youth groups, college groups, groups that have met at homes, groups that have met informally, and groups in which I was the youngest by several decades. However, with all that time spent in small groups, I had spent very little time leading one. Last year, I became a small group leader at my local church, shepherding middle school guys on a weekly basis. While I wasn’t totally foreign to teaching middle school guys in a church setting, I certainly wasn’t a veteran either. Almost immediately, I had these great ideas about what my small group would look like and how great it would be. Needless to say, when my romanticized vision of small groups met with reality, it looked much different than I anticipated. In the process of trying to re-create a more realistic picture of small groups, Jesus taught me (and keeps reminding me of) several key lessons that I as a leader needed to hear.

1. Be Patient

I have lost track of how many times I wish the kids I taught would grow in grace and understanding faster or, for some of my kids, I wish they would trust in Jesus sooner rather than later. As small group leaders, we can subtly develop a Messiah complex of sorts. “If I just use this curriculum. If I just do things this way. If we just read this book or if I can be this sort of leader, then the group will change."

Whatever challenges you face, never stop reminding yourself, as Zac Eswine confesses in Sensing Jesus, “I am not the Christ.”[1] We were never intended to “be Jesus” to anyone, including our small group. You can’t carry that weight. You weren’t meant to. As much as we pour into our groups, as many seeds that get planted, we can never lose sight that God gives the growth (1 Cor. 3:6-7). We should testify to the good news of the gospel and trust God that it will produce fruit in its ordained time. When Paul writes that God, “who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Phil. 1:6), do you trust that it applies to your small group?

2. Don’t Be Afraid of Big Words

One of the qualms that I have with American Christianity, particularly in student ministry, is that we are afraid our people can’t handle big, theological words or concepts. They have minds as well as hearts, so engage both. When we don’t, not only is this insulting, it also (in the long run) is unhelpful. It shapes disciples who are a foot wide, but an inch deep, so to speak. Shallow teaching leads to shallow theology which leads to shallow worship. Our people need more than that. They need a deep gospel because in life they will face deep and complex problems, namely, the curse of sin that affects everything.

In Romans 1:16, Paul writes that the gospel is “the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes.” In the gospel, the power of God works mightily, not just in saving, but in sustaining and maturing. Salvation isn’t just concerned with our justification, but also our sanctification and glorification. If we define salvation this way (which I think is the way the Bible would define it), and the gospel is the power of God for salvation, then we can be confident that as we lead our small groups and teach them biblical truth, that the Holy Spirit, in his wisdom, will bring change in our people’s hearts, not us. We are free to challenge those we lead with words they may not know and teach them what they do mean, knowing that the Holy Spirit will do his work.

Trevin Wax, in his excellent little book Gospel-Centered Teaching makes a helpful point in this regard:

“As a group leader, you want to provide a feast and let people draw the sustenance they need. But we may have to ‘cut up the meat’ for new believers and make sure that the truth is accessible. They key is to put the biblical ingredients together and provide the meal. Fill up the plate! Don’t be afraid to challenge people, just make sure you are continually thinking of ways to drive the point home.”[2]

Later, Wax further elaborates on this point, especially as it relates to children:

“Small kids need big words. Not because they understand everything all at once but because, over time, God uses the inspired words of His Book to convict kids of sin and convince them to repent and believe in Christ.”[3]

Regardless of the ages of people in your small group, give them meat and trust God to sharpen their teeth as they digest its riches.

3. Be Consistent and Committed

In their book Lead Small, Reggie Joiner and Tom Shefchunas discuss the importance of being a consistent small group leader “Show up consistently…You cannot lead a small group without trust. You cannot build a community without trust. And the first step to gaining the trust of your [group] is making sure they know you will show up.”[4] We need to fight against the human tendency, especially in Western contexts, to be autonomous. It can be suffocating, spiritually and emotionally, to have members be nothing more than one person in a sea of faces. “Everybody needs someone who knows their name, and what’s happening in their lives.”[5] This goes for the small group leader as well. When you are consistent and committed to leading a small group, not only does that give you an opportunity to really know your people, it also gives them an opportunity to know you.

4. Show Them Jesus

The greatest need your small group has is to have you point them to Jesus. More specifically, they need you to point them to Christ’s finished work on the cross as a substitute for sinners. They need a big view of Jesus. All the programs and events we can schedule as small group leaders won’t provide what they need that Christ alone has made provision for. They need to believe in Jesus as their Prophet, Priest, and King. Your people need to know the difference between “do this and live” and “it is finished.” In the midst of a law-driven church culture and a society that says your identity is wrapped up in your behavior, they need to hear the hope of the cross and resurrection, that “those whom [God] foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified” (Rom. 8:29-30).

Unfortunately, many of your small group members, specifically those who have already been born again, may live with a low-level guilt because they think somehow they haven’t done enough for God to be pleased with and they are scared he hates them. Give them some hope, some grace. Point them to the Living Word seen in the written Word. Show them all the promises that are already theirs in Christ. A small group who delights in Christ’s finished work for his people and is addicted to grace will be transformative and a place where people connect in genuine, honest community.

5. Help Them Love the Church

As of late, it has been “trendy” to hate on the Church. With the influence of postmodernism and various elements of the “emerging church” conversation still lingering about, we need to lead our people in seeing with new eyes the centrality of the local church in the life of a Christian. With all the problems in the Church (and yes, there are many), the Bride of Christ is Jesus’ chosen means by which he carries out his mission. In a Twitter post on December 30, Juan Sanchez, preaching pastor of High Pointe Austin, quotes D.A. Carson on the Church, saying, “It was inconceivable in the New Testament for someone to say I'm a Christian, but I'm not part of a church.”[6]

Jesus is gathering for himself a ransomed people, not just a bunch of isolated individuals. Your small group needs to see community in the local church as a place where Jesus is made much of, sin is fought against and joy is fought for, and people come from various backgrounds and seasons of life to do life as one family. They need the Church more than they know. Help them see that for themselves.

6. Don’t Be Discouraged

After reading all this, you might be thinking to yourself, “Chris, I can’t do this. If this is what it takes to be a small group leader, I won’t make the cut.” Let me provide a word of encouragement. First off, I by no means what to say, “This is the standard of being a small group leader.” Some of you reading this may have been small groups leaders longer than I have been alive, so I by no means what to suggest that I have formulated the perfect model for small group leadership. To be honest, I don’t think there is one. There are too many variables to consider to try and formulate a one-size fits all model for effective small groups.

Secondly, more than effective models, your people need a Substitute and they have one in Christ. And so do you. The gospel promises you that because Christ was strong for you, you can be weak.[7] You don’t have to have all the answers and can point to Christ, who is their Wisdom (1 Cor. 2). Jesus desires that you use your gifts and passions of leading and teaching people as a human being, not as the Messiah. The gospel announces that all the you need is yours in Christ. There is one thing you need to be an effective small group leader: a heart that has been awakened by the glorious gospel of grace. All the things you need to be equipped in this task, Christ will provide. In your weakness, Christ has not left you. As a small group leader and as a child of God, your identity is not wrapped up in your inadequacies and failures. Your identity is wrapped up in the imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ, which causes your Heavenly Father to look upon you and say, “This is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased.”

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Chris Crane serves as Middle School Small Group Leader at Lake Highlands Baptist Church in Dallas, TX. He holds a B.A. in Biblical Studies from Dallas Baptist University and is currently pursuing a Th.M. at Dallas Seminary. He writes at chriscrane.net. You can follow him on Twitter: @cmcrane87.

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[1] Zach Eswine, Sensing Jesus: Life and Ministry as a Human Being (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books, 2013), 20

[2] Trevin Wax, Gospel-Centered Teaching (Nashville: B&H Publishing, 2013), 69

[3] Ibid., 73

[4] Reggie Joiner and Tom Shefchunas, Lead Small (Cumming, GA: Orange, 2012), 29

[5] Ibid., 29

[6] Juan Sanchez, Twitter post, December 30, 2013, 8:46 a.m., http://www.twitter.com/manorjuan

[7] I first heard this expression from Tullian Tchividjian’s very helpful book Jesus + Nothing = Everything (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books, 2011).

How to Balance Developing Leaders & Equipping Believers

  Sometimes the maturing process in Scripture refers to preparing people for church leadership roles. Paul seemed to have this in mind when he admonished Timothy to entrust the  “pattern of sound teaching” to faithful men who could transfer this truth to another generation of believers (2 Tim. 1:11-2:2). In other places, the Scriptures refer to church leaders as elders, spiritual shepherds, or overseers entrusted with the care and nurture of others (2 Pet. 5:1-3; Eph. 4:11-16). But growth to maturity is for every believer, not just the appointed leaders of the church. Our zeal to equip should extend to all believers (Col. 1:28-29).

In fact, growth to maturity should include both equipping leaders and assisting believers not yet ready for leadership roles. Leadership in the church differs from leadership in other settings. Of course, some important gifts and skills (charisma, initiative, communication, commanding presence, etc.) carry over into the church. God uses these abilities along with other gifts when He calls people into leadership. But the defining qualities for leaders in the church are character-driven, and godly character comes from equipping as a mature disciple (2 Tim. 3:1-13; Titus 1:5-9).

Regardless of their leadership ability, younger believers should not be appointed to leadership roles until they are spiritually mature enough for the challenge (1 Tim. 3:6, 10). On the other hand, mature Christians who may not possess natural leadership ability can function effectively in some leadership roles.

Part of Jesus’ approach to help believers mature was the gradual development of leaders. At the right time, a leadership role can serve as a critical part of spiritual development. Growth occurs when believers trust and obey God and assume responsibility for others whether through an official church office or not. In fact, a leadership role may be as simple as the casual but definite task of a friend who works hard to encourage others.

A Proper Perspective

Three men digging a ditch on a scorching summer afternoon were approached by a passerby, who asked, “What are you guys doing?”

The first, already weary from exertion, responded impatiently, “What does it look like? We’re digging a hole!”

The second added some information: “We’re building a foundation pad. This hole’s going to be filled with concrete.”

The third man, who had been whistling happily while he labored, laid his shovel aside and wiped his forehead. He then explained how this particular hole would help them place one of the massive flying buttresses needed to support an entire wall of stained glass windows for a new cathedral. After describing in great detail the planned building process, he added, “See that rubbish pile? If things go according to plan, on Christmas Eve five years from now, my family and I will worship together at the altar in that same spot.”

All three men were working hard at the same task. But their attitudes varied markedly with their perspectives. The man who could see the unseen had the best attitude and the most energy. Proper perspective enables us to survey a situation and see beyond what’s happening to its significance and to develop strategies for what should happen next. Perspective provides hope when times are tough.  And tough times are when hope emerges in mature people.

The root causes of our current crisis of maturity are complex, but as Christians, we must shoulder some of the responsibility. Though individual believers and some faith communities have found ways to grow and develop, the Church at large has lost much of the capacity to live in the world as salt and light. We haven’t made growth toward spiritual maturity a primary goal the way Scripture commands (Matt. 28:18-20; Col. 1:27-29).

In essence, the maturation processes in the Church have either collapsed or been neglected. When maturation processes collapse, mature leaders fail to emerge. Without mature leaders, families suffer, churches neglect priorities, businesses fail, and in time, cultures crumble.

We’re again at a pivot-point. Will this be our greatest catastrophe or our finest hour? It depends on our perspective of God and His Kingdom. Without a vision for maturity, it might be easy to lose hope and become weary. Are we digging ditches, or are we building something wonderful to the glory of God?

A Reason to Hope

There’s growing evidence of an emerging movement that will help us recapture a much-needed emphasis on maturity. Younger  believers are searching for a more robust, biblical understanding of the gospel. A new generation of church leaders insists that the good news involves more than justification. It also includes growth to maturity. These leaders urge us to appreciate and apply the grace that forgives at every stage of the maturation process. This  gospel-centered discipleship embraces a grace-driven process that encourages humility, produces relational honesty, and leads to maturity. Stressing the need for authentic community, spiritual growth, and good works, this process encourages believers to grow up.

John Burke sums up the need for an authentic maturity by saying:

Our generation longs for something authentic. They are searching for “the real thing,” though they don’t really know what “the real thing” is. Because this generation has endured so much “me-ism” and letdown from those they were supposed to follow and trust, they want to see a genuine faith that works for less-than-perfect people before they are willing to trust. They want to know this God-thing is more than talk, talk, talk. They desperately want permission to be who they are with the hope of becoming more. They aren’t willing to pretend, because hypocrisy repulses them. But most have yet to realize that every person is a hypocrite to some degree – the only question is whether we realize it and are honest about it.[1]

Jonathan Dodson says,

The disciples of Jesus were always attached to other disciples. They lived in authentic community. They confessed their sins and struggles alongside their successes – questioning their Savior and casting out demons. They continually came back to Jesus as their Master and eventually as their Redeemer. As the disciples grew in maturity, they did not grow beyond the need for their Redeemer. They returned to Him for forgiveness. As they began to multiply, the communities they formed did not graduate from the gospel that forgave and saved them. Instead, churches formed around their common need for Jesus. The gospel of Jesus became the unifying center of the church. As a result, the communities that formed preached Jesus, not only to those outside the church but also to one another inside the church.[2]

These men are right. The gospel Christ offers both justifies and sanctifies. May God strengthen their hands and increase their influence, and do the same of others like them. May He use them to drive back Satan and usher into the church a new season of Christ-like maturity.

God is not unaware of or indifferent to the current crisis. In the past, He’s sometimes hidden His prophets in caves, keeping them safe until a day of restoration dawns. He’s sovereign over the nations (Psalm 2), Lord of His church, and ready to defend the honor of His name and renew His people. Throughout history, whenever it seemed as if the people of God were defeated, the troubles they faced became the catalyst for fresh hope, renewal, and victory.

Sometimes refocusing perspective and building character requires hardship and defeat. Romans 8:28-29 affirms this as it reminds us, “God causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. For those God foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of His Son.”

Helping people mature is not easy. Growing disciples face many obstacles, including the enemy, who hates the idea of mature believers. But satanic opposition, though real, is only one of the problems. As this chapter has shown, we seem to have lost our way or developed corporate amnesia regarding the process and priority of helping people mature. Lacking a clear strategy about how to help people grow, we opt for hit-or-miss tactics or repeat traditional approaches only because they’re familiar.

The way is difficult and at times hard to understand. Discovering and implementing a process that produces maturity requires humility, courage, and faith. But the outcome is worth it, both now and for eternity.

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[1] John Burke, “No Perfect People Allowed”  (Grand Rapids, MI:

Zondervan, 2005), p. 69-70.

[2] Jonathan Dodson, “Gospel Centered Discipleship” (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2012), p. 17.

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Robert D. (Bob) Dukes is the President and Executive Director of Worldwide Discipleship Association (WDA), headquartered in Fayetteville, Georgia.

[This is an excerpt from Bob's forthcoming book from WDA, Maturity Matters: A Biblical Framework for Disciple Building.]

3 Ways to Love Negative Nancy

  Every pastor, ministry leader, and church-goer knows what a negative church person smells like. Cantankerous with a hint of Folgers.

But let’s get more specific.

I’m talking about the person who is negative about everything but they show up every Sunday, are in a community group, shoot — they even give 10%. What do you do with this person? They are suspicious of your leadership, the direction of the church, the new ministry endeavor, the new hire, the last sermon series, the mission’s dollars, the elders, the deacons, the membership process, the lack of position papers on alcohol and home-schooling, the quilting ladies, and the amount of bulletins printed. But they love the bad church coffee, which makes sense, they are in charge of it!

Get the picture?

Negativity comes in many different packages and people; emails and phone calls, early coffee meetings and late night barn-burners — how will you deal with it? I’ve had a man stand in my office, look me in the eyes and say, “I don’t like that you are the pastor of this church.” Thanks for sharing!

Here are three things to consider when dealing with negative church people.

1. Humble Yourself

Before you handle the pan, put on a glove. Deal with your sin before you deal with theirs. Search your own heart before you deal with someone else's.

It’s always good and biblical to humble yourself. You aren’t that great. You aren’t above being questioned or criticized. Don’t pull a muscle while thinking so highly of yourself (Rom. 12:3). Let the gospel shape and mold you.

Jesus had negative critics — and still does. Some of the strongest negativity came from his team of leaders; Peter had a knack for being negative. Peter tried to stop Jesus from fulfilling his mission. Jesus corrected him, strongly mind you, and still kept him around.

I’ve heard too many pastors and planters shoo someone away that was detracting from their mission and vision because they went against the grain; don’t put the cart infront of the horse and kick out the passengers.

2. Shepherd Them

Negative saints are still saints. They need a shepherd, not a sniper.

Instead of writing them off, fulfill your duty as a Pastor and pastor them. If they’ve sinned, rebuke them. Encourage them in the gospel. Meet with them, face to face — email wars are for losers. And when you meet, be biblical. Embody the fruits of the Spirit. You may benefit from them by asking about their perspectives. Do your homework before you give a grade. It takes a humble shepherd to learn from a negative wart, and it take a proud pastor to send a saint out to pasture with out shepherding them on the way. Maybe Mr. Negative needs to find a new church, or maybe he needs his pastor to pastor him.

Here’s the deal: negative sheep don’t detract from the mission and vision, they are whom the mission and vision exists for — if it’s biblical. Christians are never distractions. Mr. Chipper might be a slithering wolf, but you have to get up close and find out. Don’t judge negative church folk like you’re cooking a hot-pocket; you need more time. “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone” (1 Thess. 5:14-15).

Some negative church folk have a rap-sheet filled with church hopping. Could it be that none of their past pastors had the love and guts to shepherd them? The pastor couldn’t get over his wounded pride in order to deal with the pride of his assailant?

I don’t have any data but I bet I’m close to the bullseye.

3. Be Biblical

This should go without saying, but sometimes what is crystal clear is missed.

When dealing with negative church people here are a few verses to remember and put into practice.

The aim of your leadership is love. . .

“The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.” (1 Tim. 1:5)

And love looks like. . .

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (1 Cor. 13:4–7)

It’s easy to love those who love your sermons. It’s biblical love to love those who can’t stand the way you write your emails and let you know it.

And there will come a time when the controversial straw is breaking the Elder’s back. Titus 3 might be one of the ignored passages in the Bible.

“As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned.” (Titus 3:10–11)

Proverbs and the French call this person, Le Fool.

Shotgun’d Advice

Negative folks might need an heart adjustment from a loving pastor, others may not change and remain unrepentant. But you gotta go the distance here. Matthew 18 still applies. Titus 3 needs a hearing in the ears of the heart. How many ramped up negative Neil’s and Nancy’s have heard Titus 3:10-11 from the heart of a true shepherd? I bet E.T. could count it on one hand.

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J.A. Medders is the Lead Pastor of Redeemer Church in Tomball, TX. He is pursuing his M.Div at Southern Seminary. He and Natalie have one precious little girl, Ivy. Jeff digs caffeinated drinks, books, and the Triune God. He blogs at www.jamedders.com and tweets from @mrmedders.

Total Church, Leadership, and Mission

  *Note: This interview is transcribed from a Skype conversation in 2011 and reposted here.

For anyone who has planted a church or feels called to do so, there are not many better resources than the work of Steve Timmis. Steve is the Director of Acts 29 Western Europe and an elder at The Crowded House. He has also co-authored several books on the church including Total Church and Everyday Church. Steve was kind enough to spend some time with me and offer his wisdom to our readers.

BRANDON SMITH: Total Church has impacted myself and many church planters. What is the story behind your writing this book with Tim Chester?

STEVE TIMMIS: We were getting some requests from publishers to tell the story of Crowded House, but we didn't want to do that because we didn't want to present Crowded House as being a model or any kind of example. We didn't want to set it up like, "Aren't we great?" What we decided to do was to write a pretty robust ecclesiology but to earth it with our own experience at Crowded House.

I've been doing church this way for years, like decades. I had a man come up to me in Sydney, and I recognized him straight away - he had been in a church I'd pastored when I was like 25 (and I'm no longer 25, as you can see). He says, "Timmis, you're just a one-trick pony. This is exactly what you were talking about doing 25 years ago!" At one level I was slightly hurt, because I hadn't come up with anything inventive. But one the other hand, I was encouraged that the core - and it's definitely changed - but that the core theology, rationale, Christology, ecclesiology, missiology... that was forged way back then.

My principle influences have been Francis Schaeffer, the Dutch Reformers like Kuyper shifted my theology in a big way. I read Calvin's Institutes when I was very young, and got a lot of my ecclesiology from the Evangelical Anabaptists of the Reformation period. Jonathan Edwards and John Owen have been big influences, as well.

B: I had heard you say awhile back that many times it takes guests of the Crowded House some time to get comfortable around your church because of how tightly knit you are. What is it about your church that would make guests feel out of place at times?

S: It would be Christians who would feel a certain sense of disconnect. We tend do church differently than most people, because our leading edge is our "gospel communities" - living life-on-life together on mission is what is distinctive. Most churches struggle to live that out. Just today, I was coaching a senior minister at a large, solid evangelical church and some of the stories that he was telling me is that guys from his church would find it very odd at the Crowded House because of the emphasis of living life-on-life together on mission.

So, when people come and visit from elsewhere, they often comment on how I cope with people always popping in and hanging out at my house and people end up staying. For a lot of Christians, it's just weird.

B: My wife went on a mission trip to England recently, and she told me that she'd never been to such a spiritually dark place. How is your church model particularly working in England? Is this church model of life-on-life more effective in that culture?

S: English people are very private, and so in a lot of ways it's quite counter-cultural. My conviction is that if human beings are made in the image of God, and God is in community, then community is something that is part of our identity as human beings. They might be afraid of it and are undoubtedly are putting all sorts of management techniques that aren't right and godly to satisfy that desire, but it's there. So there's something that is inevitably attractive about the model. I think missionally it's very effective.

B: What are some practical ways that church leaders can encourage their people to actually want to go out and be missionaries in their context?

S: Fundamentally and ambiguously I'd say that it's a gospel issue. If they are averse to the very idea (and there's a difference between that and just being afraid of the experience), then they aren't understanding the gospel properly. Church leadership is all about creating a culture at it's very core, so leaders are responsible for creating, nurturing, and developing that culture. If the recognized leaders aren't doing that, then they aren't leaders whatever their title.

I think there are four principle areas to do this if you have a reluctant congregation, which many men have:

1) Preach it faithfully and biblically. You've got to show that this identity isn't just "my thing" or a "new trendy thing" but that it's core to gospel purpose. I find it quite helpful to use aphorisms or sound bites with substance that help people grasp biblical truth memorably. You have to preach it consistently and publicly from "house to house" to quote Paul in Acts 20.

2) Pray and sing for it. Not just the individual leader only, but he's got to shape the whole prayer life of the church around it. Corporate prayer meetings have got to be missional and you've got to rehearse and pray the gospel out. Even in terms of singing, we've got to sing missionally. Prayer and singing are great ways to capture the affections, and so leaders have the responsibility to put a lot of effort in creativity in those two areas to make sure that we're not only informing peoples minds, but that we're genuinely seeing their hearts captured by the gospel and captivated by Christ. To love Christ is to want to speak of Him and desire His fame. If we don't want to do that, then we don't truly love Him.

3) Model it. You've got to show how the gospel has captured your heart and stimulates your affections and that you're talking about Jesus and commending the gospel to people faithfully and engaging in people's lives. One problem is that leaders love talking about theory but they don't practice it in their lives. They talk about the church, but the reason why their church is institutional is because their leader tends to live institutionally. He lives like a professional, a person with an 8-6 job rather than a person who sees his identity wrapped up in the community of God's people.

4) Build structures. You've got to structure the life of the church around it. I think one of the dangers of the so-called "organic church movement" that we've sometimes been associated with is that it just doesn't appreciate the necessity of structures. All life needs structure - just look at the human body. Build structures that demonstrate and celebrate the centrality of gospel living for the life of the church. Where you put your money, effort, energy, resources, where you release people... they've all got to continue to hammer on that theme.

B: What is your opinion on how elders and church leadership should be structured in a church that is really trying to be missional?

S: I don't buy into the "first among equals" idea; I really believe in a collegiality of leadership where in particular areas one person will take the lead. What I try to do with our eldership, and we have eight in our gathering here, is to keep reiterating the vision and articulating it in different ways and engaging with them as best I can in different contexts. I am very content, not with power, but with influence. I do want to persuade people and be influential, but I can live without institutional power. Then, when the leadership has the same thought in mind, you've got to make sure that it filters through to the different leaders who are engaged with the people. You've persuaded the leaders, and they're persuading others. So, when we come to any big decision we don't just say, "We've decided this, do you agree?" because by the time we've presented it, it's filtered through the life of the church.

My principle strategy for that is generally to have absolutely as much as possible in the open forum. I encourage leaders to talk about things at the leadership level. I'm not talking about personal pastoral issues, but in terms of vision and our whole sense of our direction and who God wants us to be because I think that's the way that people become persuaded. So when it comes to making formal decisions, all the issues have been addressed and all the battles have been fought. We want to be as open as possible, and a value for me is what Paul says in 2 Corinthians, that we don't do anything in secret but that everything is out in the open. Our default is to talk about it openly. Sometimes you can't, but that's our default. For us, a lot of this is going on all the time so that people are aware instead of dumping ideas on them and asking them to approve of it.

B: Do you hold to a strictly elder-led model, or more of an elder-congregation idea?

S: We're definitely elder-led, but my conviction about being elder-led is that you've got to have people persuaded. I'm not a congregationalist, but unless the people are behind it and sign off on it in terms of people being committed to it, then you can make all the decisions you want but it won't do you any good. Leaders have got to persuade. So, if someone pushes back, I won't just accept that, I'll go after them in hopes of persuading them. I want all leaders to be persuasive for the sake of mission, for the sake of the fame of Jesus, for the glory of God.

Why Teach the Bible's Storyline?

Some of you may be wondering why so many people are talking about the Bible’s storyline lately. What’s the big deal? Why is it so important for Christians to be able to connect the dots of the Bible’s grand narrative? Here are four reasons.

1. To Gain a Biblical Worldview

The first reason we need to keep the biblical storyline in mind is because the narrative of the Bible is the narrative of the world. The Bible doesn’t just give us commands and prohibitions. It gives us an entire worldview.

We all live according to a worldview. A worldview is the lens through which we see the world and make decisions. It’s like wearing a pair of glasses. You don’t think about looking at your glasses when you have them on. You look through them to see the world around you. Everyone has a worldview, even people who are not Christians.

Unfortunately, there are many Christians who do not have a Christian worldview. They may display some of the religious trappings of Christianity, but they demonstrate by their choices that they are living by another worldview.

The storyline of the Bible is important because it helps us think as Christians formed by the great Story that tells the truth about our world. It is vitally important that people know the overarching storyline of the Bible that leads from creation, to our fall into sin, to redemption through Jesus Christ, and final restoration in the fullness of time. If we are to live as Christians in a fallen world, we must be shaped by the grand narrative of the Scriptures, the worldview we find in the Bible.

2. To Recognize and Reject False Worldviews

A few years ago, two sociologists studying the religious views of young people in North America coined the phrase “moralistic therapeutic deism.” Those are three big words that sum up the following five beliefs of many in our society today:

1. “A god exists who created and ordered the world and watches over human life on earth.” (That’s the “Deism” part. God created the world, watches things, but doesn’t do much in the way of intervening in human affairs.)
2. “God wants people to be good, nice, and fair to each other, as taught in the Bible and by most world religions.” (That’s the Moralistic part. The goal of religion is to be a nice, moral person.)
3. “The central goal of life is to be happy and to feel good about oneself.” (That’s the Therapeutic part. The most important thing in life is to be happy and well-balanced.)
4. “God does not need to be particularly involved in one’s life except when God is needed to resolve a problem.” (Now, we see the Deistic view of God combine with God’s therapeutic purpose. He exists to make us happy.)
5. “Good people go to heaven when they die.” (Salvation is accomplished through morality.)

Moralistic Therapeutic Deism. “Moralism,” for short. Our society is awash in this worldview. Even longtime church members are not immune to it.

So, if we are going to be effective witnesses to the gospel in our day and age, we must put forth a biblical view of the world that counters rival worldviews. Just think, if you were called to be a missionary to India, wouldn’t you first study Hinduism to see how it affects the culture and the people’s view of God there? Wouldn’t part of your strategy be to show how Christianity counters the Hindu worldview? Likewise, if you were called to be a missionary to Iran, would you not study the worldview of Muslims and see where Christianity and Islam diverge? A good missionary knows what Christianity teaches as opposed to what the dominant worldview of the culture says, even if that worldview is the moralistic therapeutic deism of the United States.

3. To Rightly Understand the Gospel

Another reason we need to know the story line of the Bible is because the gospel can quickly become distorted without it. The story of the Bible gives context to the gospel message about Jesus.

Too many times, we think of the gospel as a story that jumps from the Garden of Eden (we’ve all sinned) right to the cross (but Jesus fixes everything). On its own, that works fine in communicating the systematic points of our need for salvation and God’s provision in Christ, but from a biblical theological perspective, it doesn’t do justice to what’s actually in the text. Once a person becomes a Christian and cracks the Bible, they’re going to wonder what the big deal is about Israel and the covenant, since that storyline takes up roughly 75% of the Bible. Getting people into that story is important. As D.A. Carson says, the announcement is incoherent without it.

I once spent significant time witnessing to a coworker, one of those “all religions lead to God-consciousness sort of guy.” He and I went back and forth on the gospel. Eventually, he admitted that he believed Jesus had been raised from the dead bodily. Yet his explanation of the resurrection was this: God raised Jesus from the dead because He’d been unjustly condemned, and His purpose in rising was to demonstrate His God-consciousness so He could beckon us to learn from Him. In other words, Jesus was still just Master Teacher and not Savior and Lord. My coworker got the bare facts of the announcement right, and yet the story he was working from was wrong. The story line affected the announcement to the point where he really didn’t believe the gospel at all.

We need the biblical story line in order to understand the gospel of Jesus. Otherwise, sharing the gospel of Christ’s death and resurrection is like coming into a movie theater at the most climactic moment but without any knowledge of the story thus far. You will be able to discern bits and pieces of the story, but you won’t understand the full significance of what is happening unless you know the backstory.

4. To Keep Our Focus on Christ

There has been a lot of talk in recent years about making the gospel announcement of Jesus Christ front and center in our preaching and teaching. As our society becomes increasingly post-Christian, it is critical for us to not assume lost people know who God is, what He is like, and what He has done for us. We need to be clear in what we teach, with a laser-like focus on Jesus Christ our Savior. The biblical storyline helps us do this.

Every story has a main character. The Bible does too. It’s God. Specifically, it’s God as He reveals Himself to us in the Person of Jesus Christ.

Here’s what happens if we learn individual Bible stories and never connect them to the big Story. We put ourselves in the scene as if we are the main character. We take the moral examples of the Old and New Testament as if they were there to help us along in the life we’ve chosen for ourselves.

But the more we read the Bible, the more we see that God is the main character, not us. We are not the heroes learning to overcome all obstacles, persist in our faith, and call down fire from heaven. We’re the ones who need rescue, who need a Savior who will deliver us from Satan, sin, and death. It’s only in bowing before the real Hero of the story that we are in the right posture to take our place in the unfolding drama. Bearing in mind the big story of Scripture helps us keep our focus on Jesus, and off ourselves.

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Trevin Wax is managing editor of The Gospel Project at LifeWay Christian Resources, a pastor, contributor to Christianity Today, and the author of Counterfeit Gospels, Holy Subversion, and Clear Winter Nights. Trevin lives with his wife and children in Nashville.

[This is an excerpt from Trevin's new book, Gospel-Centered Teaching. Used with permission from the author.]

6 Lessons I Learned as a Rookie Pastor

  “What do you think of me as a human being?”

A few weeks into full-time pastoral ministry, this question was posed to me from a man in the middle of a counseling session. His eyes were full of tears and his face was facing the floor; he was looking to me for any type of help. I wasn’t prepared for the rawness of his question, but there he sat, waiting for me to answer his cry.

My first year of pastoral ministry was like being dropped into a battlefield that I’d only read about. Yet, there I was, in the midst of the destruction of sin and the brutality of a world following the enemy, trying to discern what it actually looked like to be in the trenches, pastoring the people of God. It was terrifying. After a year in the battle, here are six lessons that I learned as a rookie pastor.

1. Soak Yourself in Scripture

In seminary, I'd heard stories of how ministry can become all about the job and not about loving Jesus. Not me, I thought. I was prepared, I was ready, I was confident. But when I became a real pastor with real responsibilities, all of a sudden my personal devotion had screeched to a halt. I became too busy to meditate on Scripture, and I became more anxious, irritable, and impatient with everyone around me. I had become a pastor consumed with the work of ministry and not with Jesus Christ, and I was suffering for it.

Finally, the Lord opened my heart and exposed my lack of devotion to him. Psalm 1:1-3 proclaims:

“Blessed is the man whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither—whatever he does prospers.”

The busyness of ministry will make you say, “I will get my personal time in tomorrow.” But that will never happen. You must make it happen today. You cannot do the work of pastoral ministry without the nearness of Jesus and the more time you spend in God’s Word, the nearer he is.

If you are reading Scripture but not asking the Spirit of God to press it deep into your heart, you will not be truly delighting in the law of the Lord. The Spirit is the switch that once turned on, can illuminate the majesty and beauty of God’s Word to your heart and mind (1 Cor. 2:9-16). The Spirit brings vitality and freshness to the meditating on God’s Word. Jesus says that “the Spirit gives life” (John 6:33). The life-giving Word of God is what we need in the wars of ministry.

2. Jesus Is a Better Justifier

I feel justified by how many complimentary emails that I receive after a sermon. I feel justified by how many students show up to youth group on Wednesday nights. I feel justified by how many people want to meet with me for counseling. I feel justified by how much input I get to give into senior leadership decisions. I feel justified by... the list can go on. This is the performance-driven treadmill, and it dominated my thinking for a good chunk of my first year.

The first year of ministry showed me how innately destructive the desire to please people can be. I am learning that Jesus is better justifier than anything else in this world; in fact, he is the only justifier. Justification through grace alone is a glorious truth. It penetrates the heart that is driven by justification by works, and this is where the gospel begins to convict and comfort in beautiful ways.

The truth is, the treadmill of performance demands that you keep outdoing your previous effort. The next sermon has to be more profound, the next youth gathering has to be more exciting, and so on. This is absolutely exhausting. I am learning that it is God’s promise, not my performance, which sustains our relationship, and it is the cross of Jesus which justifies me, not the number of “likes” my sermons get on Facebook.

3. Point People to the True Savior

I think many pastors want to be everybody’s hero. I am wired that way. The motivation can be a good one. We long to see people freed from their struggles. However, it’s easy to glorify ourselves rather than Jesus. It’s exciting to hear people compliment our ministerial strengths. In those moments, the pastor-savior complex appears, complete with a sweet cape that we can put on, ready for the next situation to fly in to rescue.

Pastors can also go to the opposite extreme and ignore the gifts that God has given them in order to truly help people. Even a well-intentioned compliment can be turned into a theological disposition. We say, “It was actually the Trinitarian Godhead working in this situation; I had nothing to do with it.” To be sure, it is God who is transforming all people into the image of his Son, but he has called us as pastors to be on the stage of his great theater, with an important role to play in the lives of the people we serve. We are called to point them to the true Savior, while at the same time meeting them in the middle of their mess and doing all that we can to love and serve them in the ways of Jesus.

Entering the mess of people’s lives is where we experience the limit of our ability and the limitlessness of Christ’s ability. It is certainly easier to put bandages on people’s struggles, trying to sew up all that sin has done in their life in a one hour meeting, and then believing you have solved it all with a few words of wisdom. There can be a fine line between shepherding people’s lives under the authority of the true Shepherd, and trying to be the true Shepherd yourself. We must not become fatalistic about what we can do, believing that there is really nothing we can truly do to help people, but we must also guard against a sense of triumphalism and heralding ourselves as the true deliverers of people from their storms. Over and over again, I have seen that one meeting with someone was only a very small part of what the Lord was doing to heal them. My role was to bring the gospel to bear on their situation, to pray with them, and to encourage them to seek help in a variety of other places in addition to me. If we truly believe that sanctification is a God-driven but community-necessary process, then we must not let our counseling with people terminate on time with one pastor. So, I encourage people that meet with me to speak with another pastor if possible, or to join a community group where they can get in the fight with others. It’s also helpful for them to meet with a biblical counselor who can engage them more deeply.

I do want to shepherd people for the glory of God and not my own glory, and it is only in learning my role in the greater theater of God’s redeeming work that I can point people to what they desperately need – the true Savior and Shepherd of their souls.

4. Honor Other Pastors

There is something hardwired into youth which makes us want to change institutions wholesale, ignoring the opinions of those who have spent more time in the field than we have been alive. I am fortunate to serve on a church staff with several pastors who have been in ministry for decades, and I have found myself seeking out their advice and opinions on a variety of ministry and personal fronts. Sure, the context for ministry and the methods for ministry are different. The context may have been different when older pastors were cutting their teeth, but the pastoral wisdom available to you is waiting to be tapped. And it may shock you.

There are few things as important in ministry is a healthy staff culture, and if you are the guy who is continually questioning other staff members’ motives, gossiping about the “direction of the church,” believing in your heart that your sermon would have been better than his, you are helping to create an unhealthy culture that will bleed over into the church itself. Don’t be that guy. That guy can kill your church.

Do I always agree with other pastors on staff? No. But do I respect the motives and opinions of other staff members and honor those men who have a love for Christ and his Church by gladly submitting to their leadership, learning from their experience, and recognizing their collective wisdom and character that is often trying to help me? Yes.

5. Your Wife Is Your First Bride

I work for Christ’s bride and it is easy for her to receive the majority of my affections. But as a married man and a pastor, I am called to love my bride more than the bride of Christ (1 Tim. 3:5). I went through seasons in my first year where I was loving and serving my wife well, and I went through seasons where I wasn’t doing it well. This will always be a battle. Yet, I don’t want to write the book one day with a chapter lamenting about how the first ten years of our marriage were awful because of my obsession with the church. I want to honor my wife by letting her know that she is more important to me than anything else apart from Christ himself.

The health of your marriage will also dictate the health of your pastoral ministry. If you are loving and serving your wife, you will be in a much better position spiritually and emotionally to love and serve your church. Keeping several nights of my week completely free, saying no to people, and sharing about the highs and lows of ministry with my wife are a few things I am learning as I focus on putting my wife first.

As many people will attest, it is through marriage that the Lord shows how deep our need is for the gospel and for the Spirit. It is through sacrificially loving my wife that I honor the Lord with my covenant vows. And it is through loving my wife that I learn how deep the Savior’s love for his bride, the Church (Eph. 5:25).

6. Love Your People

Do you really love the church you serve? Do you love the people to whom God has sent you? I find myself loving the work of pastoral ministry more than I love the people to whom the Lord has sent me. It can be easy to dream up vision for where you want your church to be and forget the actual people who make up your local church. I find myself talking about “the church” as if it is an institution devoid of people; I speak as though it’s nothing more than a means by which I accomplish things “for the Lord.”

But the church is the people of God, called out and commissioned for his great work in the world (Matt. 28:18-20). It is to this end that we labor as pastors. We should desire to see people grow into the fullness of Jesus. It is easy to use people for “the good” of the church, but not truly love them for who they are as human beings. If you are using people rather than loving them, you’ve missed the heart of Jesus.

Look to Christ

If you allow it, pastoral ministry will demand everything from you. Yet, it's in the finished work of Jesus Christ where pastoral ministry finds its flourishing. The gospel of Jesus is the anchor we plunge down deep into our souls, and the treasure that we lay hold of with all our might.

Our flesh seeks to use pastoral ministry as that identity which justifies us. To the degree that our churches are growing, or people are being baptized, or money is being offered, or sermons are being liked – this is the degree to which our identity is secure. But if people start leaving or the money starts drying up, then our identity can begin to crumble. If our self-worth as pastors is built on what we do for God, then we will become tremendously easy prey for Satan. He will continually lie to us about what makes us acceptable in God’s sight.

Preaching the gospel of Jesus to ourselves helps us fight Satan’s lies. Our self-worth is not built on what we do for God, but is built on what he has done for us. Titus 3:5 says that “he saved us, not because of the righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy.” This verse has been manna to me over my first year of pastoral ministry, and it is this truth that you must bury down deep within your soul. It is through the mercy and grace of Jesus Christ that brings us into God’s presence. It is the very character of God – his loving kindness, his faithfulness, his mercy, his strength, his patience – that we must meditate upon. It is his character which gives purpose and peace to your circumstances. Rest in that glorious truth.

May the cross of Jesus Christ, the promise of God’s saving love through his Son, sustain your relationship with the Father rather than your own performance. May the Spirit of God propel you into a fresh season of gospel-centered worship that stirs your heart and captivates your mind. And, to paraphrase Eugene Peterson, may your life be marked by a long gaze in the same direction.

“One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.” Psalm 27:4

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R.D. McClenagan is a pastor at Door Creek Church in Madison, WI where he lives with his wife, Emily. Follow him on Twitter: @rdmcclenagan.

Avoiding Snapshots in a Picasso World

A businessman embarks on a journey in the first-class cabin of a train in Spain. To his delight, he finds that he’s sitting next to the famous artist Pablo Picasso. Gathering up his courage, he turns to the master and says, “Señor Picasso, you are a great artist, but why is all your art, all modern art, so screwed up? Why don’t you paint reality instead of these distortions?” Picasso hesitates for a moment and asks, “So what do you think reality looks like?”

The man grabs his wallet and pulls out a picture of his wife. “Here, like this. It’s my wife.”

Picasso takes the photograph, looks at it, and grins. “Really? She’s very small. And flat, too.”(1)

Defining Reality

Leadership means defining reality, and reality means more than a simple two-dimensional snapshot of the world, even though the snapshot may be true. We have too often reduced the wonder and majesty of the gospel of Jesus Christ to a simple snapshot from a wallet while trying to present him to a world that sees reality more like Picasso. While a true representation as far as it goes, it so reduces the gospel that it easily misses its greatness.

Here is the fundamental challenge as we make disciples: the gospel, this most amazing idea and truth in history, is not only for unsaved people to begin a life with Christ. No, salvation opens the door to go deeper. I once thought of Christianity as a descent up to the mountain of sanctification, a climb based far on my ability than God’s grace through Christ; the harder I worked to I scale the peak, the more I would improve at cussing less and lusting less and while gaining ground at witnessing, giving more, and so on. But now I see that the way to growth comes from plunging into the ocean of gospel truth found throughout the pages of the Bible. The more we grasp the power of this creating God, see the evil of our own depravity, and grasp the wonder of his grace, resulting in a greater understanding of his glory, the more we will help equip students to live well.

In Luke 24, the risen Lord explained the central idea of Scripture in his conversation with the disciples on the road to Emmaus in verses 44-48. In this passage, he told them everything in Moses, the Psalms, and the Prophets, meaning all the Scripture they had, must be fulfilled. And then he told them what these Scriptures say: that the Christ must suffer and rise from the dead, and that repentance and the forgiveness of sins will be preached to the nations. Jesus makes crystal clear the redeeming mission of God through all of Scripture. Similarly, in 1 Corinthians 15, Paul related Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection to all the Scriptures.

The Mission of God

The mission of God is central to all of Scripture, all of creation, all of history, and therefore, all of life. Jesus and his work on the cross speaks to everything from attitude (see Philippians 2) to forgiveness (see Ephesians 4), from how we understand finances (see 2 Corinthians 8) to how we deal with sexual temptation (see 1 Corinthians 6), or from how we deal with disciple-making (see 2 Timothy 2:1-2) to how we understand marriage (see Ephesians 5:25). Our encouragement in facing persecution for Christ is the gospel (see Acts 4:23-31), and our instruction in how to live all of life (see 2 Corinthians 10:9-21) is found in the gospel. Give disciples the message of God so they can spend their lives living out the mission of God.

A few years ago, I took a different approach to looking at Scripture and sharing the good news with others. I shifted from trying to spit out the most basic propositions in as brief a summary as I could, to telling them the great, epic Story of the gospel seen in Scripture. I realized most people I talked with had no clear idea of what the Bible’s message is, but saw it as a reference book for problems or a guide for morality. Where does the gospel start? With a virgin birth? At the cross? According to Luke 24:44-48, Jesus said all Scripture from Moses forward points to his work on the cross. Unlike Moralistic Therapeutic Deism, which separates the Bible into individual stories for moral training, for Jesus there is one message in Scripture, all of Scripture, and that message is the gospel.

When viewing the gospel from the perspective of all of Scripture, we see four parts to the plotline: creation, fall, rescue, and restoration. We have tended to share somewhat about the Fall and focused specifically on the rescue, or redemption. And indeed, this is part of the heart and soul of the Gospel Story. But in a post-Christian world, we must see the gospel in its fullness. In his book The Next Christians, Gabe Lyons observes that we too often see a truncated gospel that faithfully offers the fall and redemption parts of the Story, but largely ignores the aspects of creation and restoration.

Communicating the Story

The challenge we face today is a challenge of theology, not ability. We have not failed to communicate, but we have communicated too often and too well a superficial faith that contradicts the heart of the gospel, which calls us not to a minimal standard but to the surrender of all of life. “We are doing an exceedingly good job of teaching youth what we really believe,” Kenda Creasy Dean has astutely observed regarding student ministry: “Namely, that Christianity is not a big deal, that God requires little, and the church is a helpful social institution filled with nice people focused primarily on ‘folks like us’—which, of course, begs the question of whether we are really the church at all.”(2) She goes on to note how most students in our churches today cannot articulate clearly the fundamentals of our faith. While we obsess with lengthy series on dating or other topics, have we failed to give them a foundation in the glorious Gospel Story?

The opposite of Moralistic Therapeutic Deism is gospel-centered theism. We must help believers see that they are not the center of the universe and that God does not exist to please them. We have to help them get a grasp of the sovereign God who does not exist to make them happy and otherwise leave them alone. We have to move from a snapshot to help believers and unbelievers see the great drama of redemption.

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(1)  Adapted from Seth Godin, Linchpin (New York: Penguin, 2010), 2.

(2)  Kenda Creasy Dean, Almost Christian (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2010), 12.

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Alvin L. Reid is husband to Michelle and father to Josh and Hannah. He is a professor of evangelism and student ministry at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary, as well as a popular speaker and author. He has written numerous books on student ministry, evangelism, missional Christianity, and spiritual awakenings.  Follow him on Twitter: @AlvinReid.

[This was adapted from As You Go: Creating a Missional Culture of Gospel-Centered Students by Alvin L. Reid, published by NavPress. Used with permission from the author.]

Setting the Tone of Discipleship

  This is an excerpt from Jared Wilson's book, The Pastor's Justification, used with permission from the author. Purchase the book here, and check out our interview with Jared here.

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Be What You Want to See

God forbids pastoral domineering but commands instead “being examples to the flock” (1 Pet. 5:3). Therefore, pastor, whatever you are, your church will eventually become. If you are a loudmouth boaster, your church will gradually become known for loudmouth boasting. If you are a graceless idiot, your church will gradually become known for graceless idiocy. The leadership will set the tone of the community’s discipleship culture, setting the example of the church body’s “personality.” So whatever you want to see, that is what you must be.

This is another reason why plurality of eldership is so important. The most important reason to have multiple elders leading a church is because that is the biblical model. But a plurality of eldership also provides unity in leadership on the nonnegotiable qualifications but works against uniformity in leadership by establishing a collaboration of wisdom, diversity of gifts, and collection of experiences.

Elders must be qualified elders, so in several key areas they will be quite similar. But through having a plurality of elders, a church receives the example of unity in diversity, which is to be played out among the body as well. Every elder ought to “be able to teach” (1 Tim. 3:2), but not every elder must be an intellectual sort (if you follow my meaning). Every elder must be “self-controlled,” but some may be extroverts and some introverts, some may be analytical types and others creative. Every elder must be “respectable” and “a husband of one wife,” but some may be older and some may be younger. The more diversity one can manage on an elder board while still maintaining a unity on the biblical qualifications, the fellowship’s doctrinal affirmations, and the church’s mission, the better.

A plurality of elders can be an example to the congregation of unity of mind and heart despite differences. Pastors are not appointed to a church primarily to lead in the instruction of skills and the dissemination of information; they are appointed to a church primarily to lead in Christ-following.

A different set of traits is needed for pastors than for the business world’s management culture. Paul writes, “But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children” (1 Thess. 2:7). This is not exactly the pastoral image that is most popular today. In an age when machismo and “catalytic, visionary” life-coaching dominate the evangelical leadership ranks, the ministerial model of a breastfeeding mom is alien. There is a patience, a parental affection, a tender giving of one’s self that Scripture envisions for the pastor’s role in leadership. In 2 Corinthians 12:15, Paul announces, “I will most gladly spend and be spent for your souls.” That is the pastor’s heart.

Leading the Way

If we want our churches to be of one mind, to be of one heart, to assassinate their idols and feast on Christ, to be wise and winsome with the world they have forsaken, to be gentle of spirit but full of confidence and boldness, to be blossoming with the fruit of the Spirit, we must lead the way.

A pastor goes first. In groups where transparency is expected, a pastor goes first. In the humility of service, a pastor goes first. In the sharing of the gospel with the lost, a pastor goes first. In the discipleship of new believers, a pastor goes first. In the singing of spiritual songs with joy and exuberance, a pastor goes first. In living generously, a pastor goes first. In the following of Christ by the taking up of one’s cross, a pastor goes first. All I am saying is that one who talks the talk ought to walk the walk. Don’t lead your flock through domineering; lead by example.

The pastor ought to be able to say with integrity to others, as Paul says to Timothy, “Follow the pattern of the sound words that you have heard from me, in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus” (2 Tim. 1:13). It is not arrogant to instruct others to follow you, so long as you are following Christ and showing them Christ and giving them Christ. “Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ,” Paul says again (1 Cor. 11:1).

Younger pastors especially are as eager to find role models as they are eager to be role models. But we are not about trying to create fan clubs and clone armies. We are about seeding Christlikeness through the Spirit’s power. “Let no one despise you for your youth,” Paul instructs his young protégé (1 Tim. 4:12), but he provides the way to do this: “set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.” The way you prevent others from looking down on your youth is by growing up.

Growing up. That is what God wants for his church.

And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ . . . (Eph. 4:11-13)

He is making us fit for the habitation he has already promised us and given us in our mystical union with Christ. He is making us holy as he is holy.

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Jared C. Wilson (@jaredcwilson) is Becky’s husband and Macy and Grace’s daddy, and also the pastor of Middletown Springs Community Church in Middletown Springs, Vermont and the author of the books Gospel Wakefulness, Your Jesus is Too Safe, Abide, Seven Daily Sins, and Gospel Deeps. He blogs almost daily at The Gospel-Driven Church.

The Spectacle of Preaching

Awhile back, I watched Meredith Viera interview Danny Boyle, last year’s Olympic Opening Ceremony director. Viera posed a difficult question to Boyle. She inquired how Boyle’s ceremonies could ever supersede the Opening Ceremonies from Beijing in 2008. Boyle’s answer was wise. He replied that, in essence, it was impossible to top the Beijing ceremonies, so he would simply attempt to create an Opening Ceremony that was faithful to the heritage and contribution of the United Kingdom. It was, I think, the perfect answer.

But then the Opening Ceremonies began. If you watched the Opening Ceremonies last year, you understand that Boyle’s project was hardly a model of understatement. It was a celebration of the highest order featuring Queen Elizabeth, James Bond, Mr. Bean, and a legion of Mary Poppins battling He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named. Perhaps Boyle believed that he could not compete with the Beijing ceremonies. But he was, at the end of the day, creating an event that can only be described as spectacle.

Of course, spectacle is the steady diet of those who exist in the 21^st century. We fill our time with the most recent Internet memes, the most outlandish stunts, and the “biggest and the best” of whatever our endeavor is.

Over against the society enamored with spectacle, the church has been given something completely different. The church possesses the gospel of God become human, living and serving among us, dying a sacrificial death on a cross, being resurrected to new life, and giving the gift of His Spirit. On its own terms—God became human!—this truth supersedes any sort of spectacle we might hope to generate of our own effort. But, in practicality, even those of us in the church seem to believe that we need a bit of spectacle. The spectacle of the church focuses on service, hiddenness, the washing of feet, and self-sacrifice. This is exactly opposite of what most of us are used to.

And so we are caught in a dilemma. Pastors step into pulpits each week where both believers and non-believers sit—ready to varying degrees—to hear the good news. They want to faithfully proclaim, but they want to be relevant. They want the lost to hear the good news, but they do not want to bore or alienate the long-time disciple. Simultaneously, they want to make church palatable for those outside of the faith without boring them.

Those of us who are pastors have a very well-founded fear: How do we faithfully proclaim to these sorts of people? How do you preach to the lost and the saved simultaneously, knowing the wide gulf between them?

This is not a new problem, and many blogs, articles, and books have been written attempting to navigate these waters, but I thought I might share three principles that are currently guiding my preaching to our digitally-drenched age, particularly with regard to the rise of spectacle.

1. The gospel has universal application

The gospel is simple. In fact, sometimes it seems too simple to those of us who are too familiar with it. It is: Jesus lived, died, was buried, and was resurrected. His doing so fulfilled God’s requirements for justice, and receiving the gospel makes people in right standing with God.

Of course, this simple gospel has unlimited explanation. It can be applied to every person, from every walk of life. Those who find themselves in worship for the first time ever need to hear the gospel, for they need to know that they will not be saved by moralism or religious activity. Those who are long-time believers need to hear the gospel, as well. Personally, I struggle with achievement and recognition. I can be tempted to need the approval of others. This will often spill into my spiritual life, as I begin to attempt to “achieve for God.” So I need to preach the gospel to myself, as well. I need to be reminded that my requirements for righteousness have already been fulfilled at the cross and the empty tomb. There is no need for me to impress God. My righteousness is as filthy rags. But the cross gives grace.

On weeks when I find myself staring at a blank screen wondering how to preach the Scripture at hand, I remind myself that every passage of Scripture points back to Jesus Christ and his good news of salvation. Let me say that again: Every passage of Scripture points back to Jesus Christ and his good news of salvation. You cannot preach an irrelevant sermon if you constantly circle back to the message of Jesus through the text at hand. Even on weeks when your sermon needs to go a different direction (I preached on service last week, for example), the gospel will always be central to your method (i.e., service is possible because we have been transformed by grace).

Every person in your congregation needs to hear the gospel every single week. It may be in different contexts or situations, but we constantly need to be reminded of the fact that God’s entire message culminates in the person of Jesus.

2. People are hungry to understand the Scripture

Every week I have the privilege of spending hours reading and studying the Bible. And, every week, I learn something new. I have been preaching or teaching on church staff in some respect for the last eighteen years or so. I have three degrees from universities relating to theological and biblical studies. I attended church regularly since I was an infant. And still, I discover something new about the Bible every single time that I study in preparation for a sermon.

Isn’t that incredible? I certainly believe that it is. For several years I think I undersold the beauty and complexity of the Scripture when I preached, because I was afraid that it would be too complex. In short, I sold my church members short. Now I realize that was a terrible mistake. The people of my church love when I clearly and thoroughly exposit the Scripture. They listen intently to historical and theological backgrounds of the Bible each week. They, too, look forward to learning something new about the miraculous Word of God each week. They are hungry to know the Bible.

Most of the world has some frame of reference regarding the Bible. They may not be able to articulate it precisely, but they know that they should be more familiar with the Bible. Over the years, I have preached topically and narratively, but more often than not, I find that the most effective method of preaching is to return to the Bible and to explain it to the church. When they see how the Bible ties into God’s redemptive plan and they learn something new, they have a great experience—whether they are long-time believers or first-timers.

3. Application is not optional

I love theology. In my mind, a sermon that is light on theology is a poor sermon, indeed. One common mistake I made early in my preaching career, however, was to focus too heavily on theology. I loved the theories behind the Scriptural message, and I spent a great deal of time explaining them in my sermons. And, while theology is important, it cannot be the only linchpin of a sermon.

The best sermons will be an arch of sorts: theology will constitute one side, but application will be the other side. The gospel is the place where theology and application come together (hence its regularly recurring role in the sermon). But application cannot be neglected. The best preachers in the history of the church (Augustine, Chrysostom, Luther, Calvin) were excellent theologians, but they also insistent on application. I attended a preaching conference where the keynote speaker asserted that Luther’s sermons were always at least half application. Think of your favorite preachers today. They tend to be those who have excellent theology coupled with relentless application. They have rightly discerned that if the gospel is life-changing, then it must indeed change the actions which make up our lives.

I once read an apocryphal story about Abraham Lincoln listening to a sermon one Wednesday at a church near the White House. He was asked what he thought of the sermon. His analysis was that the sermon was excellent in every respect but one. He is reported to have said: “It failed. It failed because the pastor did not ask us to do something great.”

When you conclude your sermon, you must apply the truth of the gospel to everyone in the room, be they believers or not. They must be called to act on what you have shared. Only then has the sermon been completed.

If your sermon is centered on the gospel, faithfully expositing Scripture, and demanding application, then it will rarely fail. It may not be the sort of spectacle that your listeners are accustomed to digesting, but it may—unlike that sort of spectacle—be the tool God uses to change a life.

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Steve Bezner is Senior Pastor of Houston Northwest Church. He holds degrees from Hardin-Simmons University (B.A., Bible; M.A., Religion) and Baylor University (Ph.D., Religion). He is married to Joy and has two sons: Ben and Andrew. Follow him on Twitter: @Bezner.

6 Lessons from Everyday Discipleship

As lead pastor of Grace Covenant Church, I equip disciple-makers every week through preaching the gospel from the front (we call this our air-war). As a Christian, I make disciples in the every day through leading a gospel community from my home (we call this our ground war). Though known for being mildly thick in the head, if you give me enough clues I’ll eventually get it, with some help. One of the things I’m currently learning is the more involved I am in the ground-war work, the more affective I am in my air-war work. The ground war is hard, slow, messy, up-close, and personal. Daily being involved in the the ground war prevents my weekly air-war delivery from becoming cold, distant, impersonal, un-attached, and reckless. In other words, my involvement with both makes me more effective in both. Here are six lessons I’m learning as I lead my family to live in community with other people while making disciples of believers and unbelievers in the every day of life.

1. LEARN TO FACILITATE A SINGLE CONVERSATION

You're not there to teach them everything you know, you’re there to facilitate the Holy Spirit guiding them into self-discovery. Be intentional...don’t let 5 conversations go at once where everyone is talking over everyone else and no one’s listening to anyone. Instead, learn to facilitate a single discussion, where people are listened to, loved, shown interest in, and asked questions of. You’ll be blown away at what will happen.

2. MISSION IS MESSY, SO DON'T AVOID IT, MOVE INTO IT

If you’re not discouraged, overwhelmed, tired, hopeless, frustrated...you’re probably not making disciples. You’re just not. You might be attending a nice Bible study where people come, share polite observations and leave, but you’re not in anyone’s life. You’re not under the hood. You're not past the facade. So you’re simply not making disciples (although you may be disciplining people to hide their stuff and perform for other people’s approval?) Gospel discipleship is messy. Everything gets exposed. No on gets to hide. So remember, when the crap hits the fan, don’t dread it, embrace it. Thank Jesus for it. It’s prime opportunity for discipleship. Don’t see sin as defeat, see it as an act of grace through which the Spirit is exposing unbelief so we can all learn, grow, repent, and turn again to Jesus.

3. LEARN TO TRUST THE HOLY SPIRIT

Making disciples is an exercise in learning to trust the Holy Spirit, not be the Holy Spirit. You don’t have to trust the Holy Spirit listening to me preach a sermon. But when you’re out trying to make disciples, strap on. The water level rises quickly as your unbelief, lack of skill, and ungodly character get exposed for the world to see. Worse, you realize you can’t change anyone at the heart level. You just can’t. You might be able to strong-arm people to change a few external habits through the application of enough guilt and calls for more will power, but we all know how long that kind of change will last. So it’s discouraging and humbling all at the same time. And then it becomes freeing when you realize the pressure’s off. You can’t do it! Now you get to act like you believe that by trusting the only One who can to do the heavy lifting. Phew! What a relief. Unless Jesus shows up, this will be a waste of time. Guess what? Now you’re in a place of utter dependance upon the Spirit of God working through the power of the gospel. That is a good place to be when making disciples. It doesn’t remove any of the weight or urgency, it just removes the pressure. He is the one who can correct, teach, rebuke and encourage. You just have to listen to the Spirit and ask the right questions.

4. LEARN TO PERSEVERE

What I really mean when I say that is: show up. Just flat-out, every time, rain or shine, feel like it or not, show up. I say that because most people don't. Lots of leaders start strong with lots of enthusiasm, but in the long run bring little sticking power. And you just won't make disciples if you don't stay after it. Let me explain. Wednesday is the hardest day of the week for me. Every week. No exceptions. It’s also when our gospel community gathers for our “structured” time of learning (we share a meal and then dive in). Coincidence? I don't think so. There hasn’t been a Wednesday I haven’t been tempted to cancel. Long day, stuff at work, kids get sick, you name it. Wednesday is official crap-interface-fan day, because the enemy wants me to quite, to cancel, to make up excuses, to go home and veg. Maybe even hit the sack early for a change? Anything but open my home and invest in other people's lives.

My selfishness, neediness, idols and unbelief all come boiling to the surface about 4:30 every Wednesday afternoon. And it's what happens in that moment that determines whether or not I'm going to be a person who makes disciples for the long run. No wonder Paul said he beats his body (I Cor. 9:27). This is flat out work, and my flesh often rebels and just wants to take a break. So I have to repent of my dependance upon myself, of my desire to avoid discomfort, and push ahead.

By 10:00 that night I’m standing in my kitchen, amazed, saying “Dear Jesus, thank you for saving me from myself. Again.”

Because there just aren’t any “average” nights when Jesus is at work. Every night something significant changes for someone. A penny drops. A connection gets made for an unbeliever. A new believers shares a fresh insight into God’s grace that rocks all of us. An old believer get convicted in a new way. Questions get asked, wrestling takes place, sin gets confessed, grace gets applied, tears get shed, laughter c and my ripples through the house, and my heart is once again full. And I almost missed it to indulge my selfishness! And often times the best moments come from where I least expected, from those I don’t even think were listening or paying attention. So the simple lesson is this: don’t trust in how you “feel”, trust that the Holy Spirit that is working and just wants you to be obedient. So show up. And watch Him do his thing.

5. LEARN TO MAKE A PLAN, BE FLEXIBLE, EMBRACE THE UNEXPECTED

One night my entire GC canceled between 4 and 5:30. I came out of a meeting and had 5 texts, all with differing reasons why they couldn't make it (all legitimate by the way, no complaining here). Great, I thought to myself. A young gal who was a new believer in our group was bringing her unbelieving boyfriend over for the first time, and I was frustrated. This was supposed to be the night we would show him our "family" identity! We had talked about it, planned it, prepared for it. And now everyone had bailed and he’d show up and it’d just be me? Some family. Totally lame. When he showed up I did the only thing I could think of. I asked him if he wanted to help me do the dishes while Sharon put the kids to bed. We cleaned the kitchen for an hour, and in the process I got to hear his story. The night I had pegged for a total wash (no pun intended) turned into the ice-breaking relational-building event that motivated him to come back again the next week.

See what happened? I know, it seems small. But small is big in disciple making. We'd made a plan, it fell apart, we flexed, and I spent an evening hanging with just him getting to know his story. For him, that night I went from “the pastor” to a real person who cared enough to ask questions and listen to his stuff. And none of this could have happened had things gone the way I’d planned.  Jesus knew what was needed. Make a plan, be flexible, and embrace the unexpected. (Oh, and by the way, we’ll be baptizing that young man this summer!)

6. LEARN TO PLAY THE LONG GAME

When you’re in community, and building relationships, and inviting people into your life, and really caring for them, it gives you freedom. You can have hard conversations, you can dig into to the real issues, and you don’t feel the weight of having to address every issue in a single conversation because you’re going to see that person the next day. You don’t have to hit a home run every time. You’re looking for base hits. And the accumulative affect of that will blow your mind. In one sense there’s urgency in our disciple-making; in another sense there’s patience, because I’m wanting to make a life-time disciple out of the men in my group, and I’m willing to stick it out.

It also means I don’t have to point out every little thing I see wrong with them. I love them, I walk with them, I ask lots of questions, I talk about the gospel, and before I know it...they’re confessing the sin that I saw a long time ago! But it’s not because I pointed it out and now they want to change in order to please me, it’s the Holy Spirit convicting them of their sin or unbelief and working in their heart true change.

So hear this...you don’t have to return the kick-off for a touchdown. 2 yards over the right tackle is progress. 4 yards up the middle is progress. Stack a few first downs together and after a series of plays, guess what, you’re staring at the end-zone. Disciple-making is not a series of hail-mary’s for touchdowns. It’s a series of well-planned and executed first-downs that regularly put you in the Red Zone for striking distance.

LAST WORD

Making disciples isn’t a recipe. Neither is this article. These are ideas. These are components of a healthy group. These are disciple-making tools. Don't look for a recipe. If it doesn't work, change it. Make an adjustment. Make it your own. Just like a baseball swing...there are some mechanics that are a must. Every good hitter has them. But many of their swings look different. The fundamental mechanics are buried under their personal adaption of the basics. So make these your own, get on the field, try stuff out, scrap it when it doesn't work, tweak it when you get stuck, and make adjustments as you go. And above all, keep swinging!

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Josh McPherson serves as lead pastor of Grace Covenant Church in Wenatchee WA, a church he helped plant in 2008. He is a member of Acts 29 and graduated from the Resurgence Training Center in 2010. He also holds an undergraduate degree in biblical studies and is currently finishing his graduate degree from Western Seminary. He and his wife Sharon have four children: Ella Mae, Levi Gregory, Amelia Claire, and Gideon Joshua. Twitter: @JoshMcPherson79

Related Articles:

• Our Hunger for Community by Brad Watson
• Radical Individualism and the Church as Family by Joe Hellerman
• Meet Jill and Cliff (& The Holy Spirit) by Josh Cousineau

Legacy: Why Authority Matters

In the later years of Solomon’s reign, he made conditions for the Israelites extremely harsh. The people referred to his reign as a heavy yoke. In the period after Solomon’s death, the void in leadership resulted in a division between the people of Israel. In hopes of bettering their working condi- tions, the people wanted to have a man named Jeroboam made king instead of Solomon’s son, Rehoboam. They were so fed up with Solomon’s rule, Rehoboam had to flee to the city of Shechem, afraid for his life.

Jeroboam came to Rehoboam in Shechem with a deal. “Your father made our yoke heavy. Now there- fore lighten the hard service of your father and his heavy yoke on us, and we will serve you” (1 Kings 12:4). In response, Rehoboam asked for three days to seek counsel.

Initially, Rehoboam went to the older advisers who served under his father. Their advice? “If you will be a servant to this people today and serve them, and speak good words to them when you answer them, then they will be your servants forever” (1 Kings 12:7). They called Rehoboam to be a servant leader who ruled for the good of the people.

The Bible records, “But [Rehoboam] abandoned the counsel that the old men gave him and took counsel with the young men who had grown up with him and stood before him” (1 Kings 12:9). When the third day came and the people of Israel came to hear Rehoboam’s answer to their request, he said, “My father made your yoke heavy, but I will add to your yoke. My father disciplined you with whips, but I will discipline you with scorpions” (1 Kings 12:14). Rather than choose to be a servant leader, Rehoboam demanded to be served. The result? A kingdom divided and thrown into chaos for decades.

As king, Rehoboam had a responsibility to serve and lead his people well. Instead, he abused the authority given him and ruled selfishly. Rehoboam’s downfall was ultimately the result of a com- plete disregard for the true meaning of authority.

Authority equals responsibility. Those of us who are leaders have responsibility, which means we have the opportunity to respond faithfully and steward what we are given for God’s glory. We are entrusted with the blessing of authority in order to be a blessing to our people.

The most blessed man ever to walk the earth was Solomon. He appeared to have it all—wealth, wisdom, a strong military, food and drink, women, and more. But he lacked one thing: a legacy. At the end of his life, when it was time for his son Rehoboam to assume the mantle of responsibility, Rehoboam instead brought devastation to his people and his kingdom.

As leaders, we too have the power to drive an organization towards health or towards disaster.

For me, this rings strongly true when I think of my family. I want to lead my family well, and I want to leave a good legacy. At times, I am afraid I won’t be able to do this. The temptation to be like Rehoboam is strong; to place my career over my family, leading so that I am served rather than lead- ing to serve—choosing myself over my family.

Rehoboam’s life reveals a challenging truth: a single decision or indiscretion can determine your legacy. When I am tempted to sin (or do sin), it has the potential to destroy my legacy. But it also allows for the opportunity to further establish my legacy through repentance.

Thankfully, grace changes everything. My wife and kids are incredible blessings. God has trans- formed a life headed towards a terrible legacy into a life with hope for a legacy that honors Him. He’s teaching me to obey him, which is essential for impacting the future, because how we view and respond to authority will determine the legacy of our authority.

UNDERSTANDING AUTHORITY

Whether it’s a founder, a chairman, a president, a CEO, an executive director, or a senior pastor, most organizations give somebody the final say. However, the majority of people exist somewhere below the top of the org chart.

So two questions arise: What does it look like to be called to a role that supports the primary leader? And, if you’re the primary leader, what does it look like to faithfully lead those entrusted to your oversight? We must be able to see ourselves as both servant and leader. Some days we’re taking out trash; other days we’re in charge of the most critical project of the year. How can we lead and serve simultaneously? How can we be good stewards of authority, and also submit to authority in a way that honors God and others?

A successful organization builds a vision that allows everyone to participate. The struggle is that we all want the glory, praise, and attention that comes from being in charge. The human craving for recognition and power is deep and unquenchable. However, there is hope that we can learn to lead and serve without being controlled by this longing. And this hope is rooted in an understanding of the biblical foundations of authority.

AUTHORITY IS GOD’S DESIGN

Like it or not, authority is God’s design. It is modeled after his own nature.

We love authority if we’re the ones who have it; we despite it if we’re under it. Ever since the Garden of Eden, humanity as a whole has been on a hell-bent quest to eschew all authority—God-given or not (Genesis 3:1-6).

I struggle with authority like everyone else. I’m selfish and want to make my own decisions. I want to be my own sovereign god. This shows up in some amusing and revealing ways.

For instance, I hate potlucks. I don’t know who cooked the food. I don’t know how clean their kitch- en is, or if they have cats (is there hair in that chocolate cake?). I can’t control it, so I eat what my family brings. Or I go for the fried chicken because it was fried. I don’t want to relax and trust oth- ers—even in something so trivial.

A potluck is just a simple example. Behind my desire to architect the perfect meal is really a heart unwilling to submit to anything that strips me of control, to authority—even a meaningless potluck.

Authority is not the problem. Our stubborn hearts are the problem. Our response to authority is rebellion, made all the more devastating because authority is actually a beautiful gift. Both authority and its corollary—submission—emanate from the core of God’s identity. To exercise authority and submission is to image God. Theologian Bruce Ware goes so far as to say, “An authority-submission structure marks the very nature of the eternal Being of the one who is three.” (Ware, Bruce A. Father, Son, & Holy Spirit).

Within the Trinity, God exercises and submits to authority with perfect joy. He invites us to do the same, while also showing us how. This means that leaders need to be both in and under authority, willing to take the lead and willing to follow. How are you resisting authority in your life? Where is submission a challenge for you?

GOD’S CHAIN OF COMMAND

There is one God, who is three persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

The Trinity is perhaps the greatest mystery in the universe—one we can only approach, describe, and understand by faith. The Bible does not use the word “Trinity” to describe the Godhead, but Scripture clearly teaches that all three members exist in eternity (none were created) and all partici- pate in creation (Gen. 1:2 cf. Gen. 1:26 cf. John 1:1–3). They have in common the divine nature, which theologian J. Scott Horrell describes: “the generic essence, universal property, or attributes of Godness manifest equally in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.” Each member is equally God while remaining a distinct person with a distinct station and roles:

• The Father is God (Matt. 6:9–10; 1 Cor. 15:28; Eph. 1:3). He occupies the “position and authority, supreme among the Persons of the Godhead,” 6 for he appointed Jesus as King (Ps. 2:5–9), and he sends the Son (John 17:8) and the Holy Spirit (John 14:26). As Dr. Ware points out, God the Father is also described as our provider, protector, savior, help- er, and guide. 7 Each of these attributes outlines a position of power.
• The Son is God (John 1:1–3; 15:5; Phil. 2:9–11; Col. 2:9; Heb. 1:1–2). Jesus reigns at the right hand of the Father (Heb. 12:2) as King of Kings and Lord of Lords (1 Tim. 6:15). His placement at “right hand of God” is significant because it implies that Jesus is both in and under authority. He is under the Father’s authority, but over Creation. The Bible also describes God the Son as High Priest (Heb. 8:1), Chief Shepherd (1 Pet. 5:4), the head of the Church (Eph. 5:23), and Lamb of God (John 1:29). All of these imply authority, except for the last, which refers to the submissive role of Jesus.
• The Spirit is God (Acts 5:3–4; 1 Cor. 2:10–11; Heb. 9:14). Theologian J.I. Packer sum- marizes the Spirit’s role: “The distinctive, constant, basic ministry of the Holy Spirit . . . is to mediate Christ’s presence to believers.” (J.I. Packer, Keep in Step with the Spirit). God the Holy Spirit enables regeneration of our hard hearts (John 3:3–8) and continually sanctifies us and empowers us to be- come more like Jesus (2 Cor. 4:6). He also inspired the writing of Scripture (2 Tim. 3:16; 2 Pet. 1:21). In these ways, the Spirit is under Christ’s (and therefore the Father’s) authority, but over us.

The hierarchy of God—with the Spirit submitting to the Son, the Son submitting to the Father (John 14:25–26), and the Spirit submitting to both—may seem primitive or out of place in the land of “We the people”. But the Trinity proves that perfect peace, love, equality, respect, joy, and freedom can exist within a culture of authority and submission. There is no complaining or jealousy among the Trinity, just joy-filled submission. If our Creator submits willingly within the Godhead, then I sug- gest our problem with authority is not the perceived injustice of submission, but instead our proud, unwilling hearts. In fact, submission should not be considered demeaning, but rather godly.

We all have warped conceptions of submission and authority. Mine grew out of an immature belief that things are always better when I’m in control—coupled with the lack of consequences for irresponsible behaviors. One night my siblings and I were driving drunk. We totaled our car and almost died by speeding into a river. My dad came and met us at the scene of the accident. I had disregarded the authority of my parents, the authority of the police, and certainly the authority of God.

The next night, they took us out to the fanciest restaurant in town. It didn’t feel like it was out of grace, but more out of a desire to buy our love and avoid painful disciplinary conversation. This is just one example of how I was allowed to go unchecked in my belief that I was my own best authority. Real authority was absent from my life—so I ruled myself, because I could. It wasn’t until years later, when I became a Christian, that I saw my ungodly view of authority and how my stubborn heart cringed at submission and craved control.

This sort of baggage isn’t easily offloaded. But regardless of our upbringing and biases, we are all created in the image of this God (Gen. 1:27), who has authority over himself and also submits to himself. This means our highest purpose is to submit to our Maker, trust his Word, enjoy the grace of his rule and reign, and learn from him rather than try to usurp him.

The roles and relationships found within the Trinity serve as our only perfect example of what hu- man relationships can and should be. We must embrace God’s Trinitarian Leadership in order to wield authority as a beneficial tool and not a dangerous weapon. We must also submit to it as a sanctifying means of grace, not an oppressive yolk to be brushed off or abandoned altogether, which is equally destructive (Judges 21:25; Prov. 19:18).

AUTHORITY WITHOUT BAGGAGE

Many of us carry emotional baggage that we received at a very young age from authority figures. Sadly, more kids are raised with and influenced by their parents’ absence than they are by their parents’ presence. Maybe they never knew their father, or their parents were divorced, or their parents were too busy spending their time on “more important” things, like work or hobbies. On the other side of the spectrum, many children grew up in families filled with anger and abuse. Few of us grew up with a family that demonstrated the blessing of godly leadership.

Influenced by our sin and the sin around us, it can be difficult to understand undistorted authority or willing submission. The only way we are able to do this is through observing the Trinity. We have to pick up the baggage from our bad experiences and lay it down in the presence of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Instead of fixating on what we dislike or hate about authority, we examine their interactions and find what we can love about authority. Within the relationship of the Godhead, we can see authority marked by what it should be: humility, love, and generosity.

AUTHORITY FOR THE GLORY OF GOD

The humility, love, and generosity that flow through God’s authority are not arbitrary expressions of benevolence, or capricious acts of manipulation to win our allegiance. Instead, the authority of God magnifies the glory of God.

Self-glory is a problem in human authority, as with the leader who establishes himself as some sort of demigod. For a perfect being, however, who exists as the very definition of goodness, love, and truth, God’s glory represents the triumph of his perfect kingdom. John Piper writes, “The deepest longing of the human heart and the deepest meaning of heaven and earth are summed up in this: the glory of God. The universe was made to show it, and we were made to see it and savor it.”

Even in glorifying himself, however, the humility, love, and generosity of God are evident. The Spirit glorifies the Father and the Son, and the Son glorifies the Father. God the Father is the ultimate destination of all glory, and justifiably receives it all. Yet remarkably he shares it, by receiving the glory due him through the glory given to the Son.

All three Persons of the Trinity are filled with joy at the giving and receiving of glory from each other. Their mission is mutual glory for their own joy and the joy of mankind, not personal enrichment. They suffer no envy or jealousy. Each receives glory, and each shares it readily with the others. God is glorious.

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Jamie Munson is an author and business leader. This post was excerpted with permission from his book, Authority: The Leader's Call to Serve. Check out his books, or follow him on twitter @jamiemunson, or read his articles on JamieMunson.com.

Your Language Matters

We believe in a God who “spoke” the world into existence (Genesis 1:3). This truth is a constant reminder that words and language have power to create. James compared the tongue to a rudder that steers ships, a bit that guides a horse, and even a spark that can start a fire (James 3:3-6). Clearly, God is serious about our words. Scripture is consistent in its call to us to encourage and build up with our words, praise the Lord with our words, and let truth be what our words form. There is much to write and talk about when it comes to glorifying God with our words. But for this post I want to focus on how our words can create a culture and, sometimes, unintentionally create one that is the exact opposite of that which we are trying.

How Language Hurts Missional Culture

For instance, the phrase “go to church” seems so harmless, and anytime we are corrected that we don’t go to church, we are the church, it can be easy to brush it off as nitpicky or prideful. And sometimes it is! But the reality is that this little phrase can be a big deal if used over time. The phrase insinuates that church is an event to attend rather than the adopted family of God. This little phrase can and has helped create generations of Christians that are sitting on the sidelines just viewing Christianity instead of being catalyzed to get in the game and be the church. If I am the church, that changes everything. I am a living being that is a part of a living thing that God created – the church. Now I have to figure out how this living thing is to live and participate in its life. Language is not the only culprit or the only answer, but it can assist us in creating a people who see the church as God’s people not as God’s event. This difference is worth humbly and consistently fighting for, and our language can help this.

Another issue consistently coming up in the church is getting God’s people to see there smaller church community as a day-to-day, life-on-life community instead of something on the mid-week calendar. People are always saying things like, “How was your community group?” or “Which community do you go to?” Not bad questions. But if our goal is to have our smaller community be a family of God’s servants doing life and mission together, then we want to use language that constantly reminds people of that truth. If you talk as if your communities only exist once a week, your community will believe it only exists once a week.

In addition, we love to use acronyms for everything. Unfortunately, you get new people wondering, “What in the world is the MC? Or GG? And why it is conflicting with Sarah’s DNA?” And it just makes everyone wonder WWJD in this situation. If you have insider and outsider languages, you will have insiders and outsiders. If joining your church requires a glossary, you’re using poor language.

Our language can easily isolate or train people to believe God is calling them to set aside one day or evening instead of setting aside their entire lives. We don’t want to confuse those two!

Correcting Language

There are a few ways to combat our poor language. One is to constantly explain your church’s language - what it is and what it isn’t. Try to minimize acronyms, and if you use them be ready to explain them. Constantly be sharing what God created this community to be and have explanations in your announcements, literature, and website.

For instance, instead of announcing that your church’s missional communities meet on Wednesday night, announce that you have missional communities and explain what those are. You might say something like, “We believe the church is a big family made up of smaller families, and these smaller families meet throughout the week as missional communities. A missional community, or MC, is a small family of God that is participating with God to bring the good news of Jesus to our city. You can meet with so-and-so about joining a family for a meal this Wednesday night.” Yes, it will make announcements a bit longer, but it is a teaching moment for new people and a reminder for others that MC’s are not meant to simply be a weekly potluck. It is worth restating this over and over as we are so prone to forget!

Never assume that people know what you are talking about or what your church’s language means but always explain everything. If you are calling your whole church to be “missionaries,” explain that you mean all of God’s people are missionaries in all of life and that you don’t mean to imply that the whole church should move into a hut in Papua New Guinea this next week – unless you want them to all move to a hut in Papua New Guinea, then have them do that. I don’t even know if Papua New Guinea has huts, but I digress. Minimalize church lingo. Inevitably you will have some, so go out of your way to explain it as often as possible. This goes a long way in making outsiders, newcomers, and unbelievers feel like they belong.

Another helpful language tool is to begin referring to the community as just that and the meeting as a “community meeting.” This way people will begin asking, “How was your MCM or missional community meeting?” They might ask, “How was your small group’s dinner?” This helps reiterate that your small groups eat dinner together but are much more than just that one meal. Constantly differentiate between what your community is and what it does by using different language for both. We are a “community group,” and we have “weekly community outings.” This will take time to create, but it will catch on. People will recognize the difference, and visitors and unbelievers will begin to sense that something is different too!

Think through what you are trying to accomplish on Sunday’s and what to call that. There is a difference between a service and a gathering. A Sunday service conveys that this is something here to serve you and for you to consume, which isn’t bad if this is what you are going for. A gathering, though, creates a posture that this is something in which you participate. In the Soma family, we try to be very intentional about inviting God’s people to participate in God’s work. We use the term “gathering” to help create this culture. A gathering can help facilitate the belief that we are the church, and we are gathering together on a Sunday, rather than the church being a service that we attend.

We expect God’s people to gather together to serve, worship, and build up one another so they can then be sent out to do the same in the world.

Preachers and teachers should be especially considerate with the language they use. It can be very easy to slip into using a bunch of doctrinal terms, Greek words, and bible character references as if everyone knows who or what you are talking about.  I remember growing up with a leader named Paul, and he was always saying, “Paul said this” or “Paul wrote that.” I always thought he was talking about himself in the first person, and I was very confused. Telling people who Paul is, even briefly, adds so much to his writing. You could say something like, “This dude, Paul, was essentially a terrorist who killed Christians until he met Jesus.” One quick sentence can end a lot of confusion and allow the listener to engage more with the content of the message rather than trying to figure out the characters or writers.

Many doctrinal terms can be explained with a mere sentence or two, allowing the listener to learn and understand this doctrinal language rather than being lost with every term. Try to never use Greek or Hebrew words, unless absolutely necessary, as we want to teach in the language of our listeners. We don’t need to preach our homework but rather the good news message that God has given us. Being sloppy by thinking that everyone knows what we are talking about is assuming too much and will isolate the unbeliever or new believer, creating missed opportunities to share the gospel with the lost or help the new believer grow in maturity. Let us be considerate and take the extra time to explain every doctrinal term and use language that is common to our context and culture. This is the very art of teaching, is it not?

Lazy Language with the Gospel

I have caught myself often being sloppy with the gospel. Even we gospel-centered disciple makers can be lazy and hear of people’s sins and issues and toss out a quick, “You just need to believe the gospel.” We can take this precious word and toss it around, abuse, overuse, and mishandle it until it loses its meaning. This has already happened as many think “gospel” is simply a genre of music and others a denomination or theological camp. The gospel is not just a word; it is good news. Don’t just tell people to believe the gospel but tell them what this “good news” is. Pray through what aspect of the gospel they may need to hear. Do they need a reminder of the good news of the forgiveness won for them on the cross? Do they need a reminder of the good news that Jesus is alive and will return one day to make all things new? Maybe they feel hopeless to beat sin and need to hear the good news that Jesus sent the Spirit to dwell in us. Explaining the good news of the gospel is powerful for everyone who speaks and hears it!

Additionally, use God’s Word to show these truths. God’s Word is rich with explanations of the good news and is our best tool for revealing all that Christ accomplished for us on the cross. Use God’s Word to explain the gospel, and others will start looking to God’s Word on their own to understand the gospel!

For instance, if someone is struggling with guilt and shame and scared to confess their sins, I might take them to John 3 to illustrate how Jesus came not to condemn the world but to save it. God’s Word says we were condemned already. I would explain the good news that Jesus knows their sin, came to rescue them, and that his blood washes their sin away. I would encourage them be sharing that Christ died for them while they were still sinners, so they are free to confess their sin and walk away from it. A conversation like this, with prayer and scripture, is more powerful than simply saying, “You just need to believe the gospel.”

Language is a gift. Let us use it wisely and intentionally to create a culture that encourages and builds up generations to love and serve Jesus as his church!

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Jake Chambers (@JakeJayChambers) is a member of Jesus’ bride - the church. He is the husband to his beautiful bride Lindsey, and a daddy to his boy Ezra. Jake is passionate about seeing the gospel both transform lives and create communities that love Jesus, the city, and the lost. He currently serves Red Door Church through leading, preaching, equipping, and pastoring. You can read more of his writing at reddoorlife.tv.

Why Entrepreneurs Don't Like Your Church

Most readers know me as a missional community practitioner and don’t realize I am also an entrepreneur. I currently own an investment portfolio management firm, and have for 10 years. I’ve started three other businesses, and will be starting another when we move to Phoenix later this year. I am a business starter, that’s my ‘day job.’ Most churches have a hard time getting entrepreneurs, like me, to join their mission and vision. We are either running from church or passively sitting in pews on Sunday. We have gifts and strengths to offer, but they lay dormant in the local church. Why? It isn't for a lack of asking. Pastors frequently attempt to pull the business owners in but are met with, “I’m too busy.” Excuses, like these, are usually a cloud of smoke to mask the true objections. My hope is to help shed some light on what lies beneath the "I'm too busy" objection.

A Big Problem

First, entrepreneurs are not more important or better than the rest of the church. However, we can all agree that the entrepreneur is usually a pretty odd specimen with unique gifts and abilities. The church can’t afford to have anyone’s gifts sidelined. The mission of the church is too important to miss out on a single part of the body. What does it say about our church, if a fraction of its gifts go unused, unengaged?

The entrepreneur is not super human, but they usually have a ton of capacity, they aren’t scared of risk, they love thinking outside the box, and they don’t mind submitting to leadership. What’s really interesting is that if they find something they are sold out for, they’ll call others to join them. They can become a huge ally for the church to aid in the understanding of making disciples who make disciples. The problem is that for many years the entrepreneur has been told to “fit into this box” or go elsewhere. Many have. Many entrepreneurs have decided to fulfill the great commission through para-church organizations and non-profits. I understand why.

What if you were a baseball player and were continually told by your coach that instead of playing baseball, you were going to knit scarfs? I’m guessing you’d find a different place to allow your talent to mature. In a sense, churches have been doing this for years with the entrepreneur. We don't put them in the game they were designed to play.

Entrepreneurs are so unique they can give a church's vision a run for its money, ask tough questions, and sharpen the leadership of the local church. They have the ability to challenge and push leaders in ways other folks can't. They cause us to dream bigger, get specific, empower others, and take major risks. So, why do entrepreneurs hate your church?

Your Vision is Too Small

What do I mean by “vision?” The mission of all followers of Jesus is to make disciples who make disciples (Matthew 28:18-20). The vision for your local church is the how, where, and who of this commission. How are you going to make disciples? Where are you going to go? Who are you going to reach? Your church was placed on earth to make disciples. That is why you exist. If we all had the exact same vision for the how, where, and who we were going to make disciples of, then we might as well be one big church. But, the fact is, God has given each church a unique vision to carry out the mission he has given us all. Far too often, churches settle for a vision that is too small.

Entrepreneurs think big. Honestly, that’s also what makes us (entrepreneurs) fail sometimes. We think all our ideas are going to be the next big thing, when in reality, our dreams are often bigger than the marketplace can handle. However, these big dreams allow businesses to be born and succeed.

Entrepreneurs want to be part of something big, not something that is going to only affect those around the block. Now, those around the block might be the starting point to implement the vision, but shouldn’t be the end point. If you want entrepreneurs to be engaged on the mission in the context God has given your church, think big, not small.

Soma Communities told me they wanted to see 3,000 missional communities in the Seattle area. That’s 1 for every 1,000 people. That vision started with me getting after it, trained, and excited for multiplication. If they merely told me that they wanted me to go and start a missional community in my neighborhood, that would have been great and all, but the first thing I’d be thinking is: “Is that it? Is that where I stop?” Honestly, as an entrepreneur, to have that be the end goal, wouldn’t be exciting enough.

God is our example for casting vision. He told Abraham: “Your offspring will be numbered as the stars. The whole earth will be blessed through your family.” This is a big vision. God also said that we were to be his witnesses, not only to our neighbors and cities, but to the ends of the earth (Acts 1:8). Think of this vision laid out by God in Genesis and Acts. It includes the people next door to you, but is also much bigger that that. God’s vision is simultaneously as small as a family and as big as the world.

So, when we hear this, we get excited. Not because we can do it on our own, but because we know that God can and he has given us the Spirit to empower us for the mission. This is a vision beyond our powers and requires us to rely on the Spirit. So, while others may balk at a large vision, the entrepreneur will be your ally in calling people to fulfilling the seemingly impossible. We need entrepreneurs calling us to push the envelope, to think beyond our neighborhood and consider the world. They will become a litmus test: if your vision is too small and doesn’t require risk, innovation, or creative thinking, they will pick up on this.

Your Vision is too Generic

Having a large vision is one thing, but if it is a generic vision, it will likely die. God’s vision for Abraham was big, but it was also specific. He told Abraham: “Go to the land I will show you.” At times, God is not always specific with us, but that’s okay. He’s God. But, what I do find interesting is how God treated Paul on the mission field. Paul listened to Jesus when he said, “you’ll be my witness even to the ends of the earth” (big vision) and then listened to the Spirit as he continued to instruct Paul where to go and where not go. It is amazing to watch how specific the Spirit was with Paul as he listened and relied on God (Acts 16).

What we’ll see in churches is that their vision is: “We want to glorify God in all the earth.”  Well, thanks? It is a big vision, but I can frankly do that without being connected to your specific church.

Give us some handles on what you mean. When Soma Communities says: “We want to see 3,000 Missional Communities in the Puget Sound area.” This gives me so much information right up front. I see a big vision: a number that they desire to attain. I also see the means by which they are going to see disciples made: missional communities. The vision tells folks how they plan on glorifying god in the earth. You don’t necessarily need to see a number, but put some sort of descriptive handles so we aren’t left to wander.

It’d be like me trying to secure a loan for my business and saying: “We want to be the best company in the whole world!” How? By being the best. Where? The world. Ridiculous. Entrepreneurs need specific vision.

Your Implementation is Too Restrictive

Many churches and pastors usually fail the most here. You literally take the best weapon from the entrepreneur out of their hand by wanting to control everything.

You tell them how things are going to run on Sunday, how things are going to run in your programs, and how things are going to work in their community, small group, or missional community.

Entrepreneurs are used to coming up with game plans and strategies based on who they are, what their context is, and who is working alongside them. Churches steal that mindset from the entrepreneur and tell them, “Our way or the highway.” And frankly, most entrepreneurs have said, “See ya later.”

Churches then chalk it up to us not wanting to submit to leadership, but that’s not it.  We don’t want to be controlled and manipulated into thinking the pastor knows it all and knows how our lives should work. That sounds a little harsh, but that’s how they see it.

Entrepreneurs are used to being handed the “rules” to live within as they deal with local government, tax laws, officials, etc. Once we figure out the “rules of engagement” we can take it and build our businesses within that framework.

Think like that when implementing your vision. How can the church set up a system where it allows the entrepreneurs to use their gifts instead of restrict them? In Soma Communities, the parameters or rules are: we believe that the primary organizing structure of the church is gospel communities on mission and how you work that out is up to you! They train, equip, and encourage. They don’t control.

The Austin Stone does this well, too. My friend Todd Engstrom, says, “For us inviting entrepreneurs into conversations that are in their fields, not just ours.  Most entrepreneurs hate the church because everything is pretty prescribed, and honestly not very complex. So, we help them think through ministry in their world, but allow them to be the experts.“ By inviting the entrepreneur into these conversations, Austin Stone has launched 9 different non-profits and unleashed leaders into full engagement in the mission of making disciples.

This is a dream for the entrepreneur. It allows us to work within the time frame that our businesses allow instead of having to be at programs, church services, or church buildings. To be part of most churches, you have to be at the church building more often than a hipster wears a scarf. Most business owners don’t have time for that. When they don’t show up to those events, they are made to feel guilty and less than a Christian for not showing up to the latest greatest event.

As a church, flip that scenario and say, “the mission and vision is critical; figure out how to make disciples in the ways that God has given you.” Empower folks! Free up the implementation of your vision to liberate more gifts. This respects the uniqueness of everyone’s design. We have all been made differently, with different gifts, with different schedules, and different ideas.

Your Methods Are Too Safe

God is sovereign, right? Don’t be a chicken pastor. If we can all agree that it’s God’s mission, God’s power, and God’s resources, why wouldn’t we risk everything we’ve got? Entrepreneurs are willing to try whatever it takes and are rarely controlled by the fear of failure. They thrive on risk and “going for it.”

Entrepreneurs can see right through the leaders who are more afraid of man than God.  They can see the fear of failure. They never want to be part of something safe and want to push the envelope with mission. They want to be sent to the places considered unsafe to live in, work in, and do ministry in.

Last year as Soma leadership, we prayed for leaders to be sent to Seattle, San Francisco, and Phoenix. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but the more I heard about Phoenix and some of the “hard things” about it, I knew I was ready.

People were saying:

• Phoenix has a ton of gangs and drugs and horrid schools.
• Phoenix is spread out and is more like a suburban context, which is impossible to do missional community life in.
• Phoenix is hard for relationship building. Most people just stay inside and don’t want to get to know other people.

All I heard was, “Yadda yadda yadda…” My wife thought through the above and said, “if all these (and other excuses) are true, shouldn’t we be the first to move in and show others about our God who lives in community? “

Pastors, stop being safe with your people. Call them to take risks in making disciples. If it doesn’t work, who cares? You’ll learn something. If you’re following Jesus, you have nothing to lose. It’s not even really a risk. God is in control and he is good at it. If you enable entrepreneurs to take risks, others will follow. Your church will quickly see the joy in following Jesus with reckless abandonment.

Final Word to Pastors

Honestly, if you are reading this and you are a pastor, know this: entrepreneurs desire to be part of what the local church is doing. They’re just tired of you thinking too small and being too timid. Dreaming big. Leading strong. Take risks. Entrepreneurs will follow you.

This article isn’t a fix-it-all. However, pastor and business starters are on the wrong page. This is meant to be a shout to the pastor from the pew on why you have been frustrated with us and we (entrepreneurs) have been frustrated with you.

I don’t believe that we are always right, or that we are better than any other person in your flock. But, for too long, we’ve been shelved and treated as though our gifts are a hindrance to the church instead of actual gifts.

If you can start to lean into these four basic things…you’ll be surprised how much you’ll see the entrepreneur get behind you and desire to be part of what the church is doing.

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Seth McBee is the adopted son of God, husband of one wife, and father of three. He’s a graduate of Seattle Pacific University with a finance degree. By trade Seth is an Investment Portfolio Manager, serving as president of McBee Advisors, Inc as well as a missional community leader, preaching elder with Soma Communities in Renton, Washington, and executive team member of the GCM Collective. Twitter @sdmcbee.

Other article by Seth: Leading Joe Blow Into Mission, The Introverted Evangelist, and How Kids Learn to Follow Jesus.

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Also Read Proclaiming Jesus by Tony Merida.

Date Your Wife - Excerpt

(Editor's Note: This is an excerpt from Justin Buzzard's Date Your Wife.) Men are always measuring themselves. You can’t hang out with a group of three or more men for more than three minutes without hearing them take measurement of themselves. Listen to what men talk about—their accomplishments, successes, and unique experiences that separate them from others. It doesn’t matter if the man is a banker, a plumber, a pastor, a CEO, an artist, an athlete, or unemployed—all men craft a standard of accomplishment by which they measure themselves and measure other men.

Men get this from Genesis 2:15. This behavior stems from a misunderstanding of the mandate God gave men back in the garden of Eden. God gave Adam and God gave us a mission to accomplish. But God never told Adam and never told us to measure ourselves by the mission. God gave us a different standard of measurement. The measure of a man is not how successful or unsuccessful a man is at carrying out his mission.

The measure of a man is not what he says about himself or what other people say about him. The true measure of a man comes from what God says about him.

Adam didn’t believe this. And we don’t believe it either.

Adam failed at his mission. He didn’t keep Genesis 2:15. He didn’t guard his garden and his marriage. That’s why Adam hid from God and hid from his wife behind the cover of fig leaves and excuses. Adam found his identity in his ability to perform Genesis 2:15, to successfully cultivate and guard. Having royally failed in his performance, Adam’s whole identity was at stake. The measurement didn’t look good, so Adam hid, excused, and blamed.

Sound familiar?

Before God gave Adam a wife, he gave him a job—to cultivate and guard the garden. But here’s the really good news: before God gave Adam a job, he gave him an identity. Before God gave Adam a job to do or a mission to accomplish, he gave Adam an identity to embrace. Before God told Adam to do anything, he told Adam who he was—he gave Adam the true way to measure and define himself.

And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. - Genesis 1:31

Very good! After creating Adam, God looks down upon Adam and declares him very good. This is the living God speaking. This is God declaring what he thinks about Adam. This is Adam’s identity. What God says goes. If God says Adam is very good, then this is the voice that defines Adam.

Adam = A man created in the image of God and declared “very good” by God.

Adam’s Genesis 2:15 calling was meant to flow out of Adam’s Genesis 1:31 identity. God told Adam what he thought about him; he gave Adam his approval—before Adam lifted a finger in the garden. Adam received his God-approved identity before he had a chance to do anything to prove himself. This is what we call grace, or the gospel—the good news of receiving favor from God that we don’t deserve or earn. But Adam gets it backward. He didn’t listen. Instead of believing, accepting, and living consistently with this God-given identity based on grace, Adam settled for an identity based on works. Adam hid, excused, and blamed in the attempt to reestablish his identity, in the attempt to prove that he was not as guilty and unsuccessful as he looked. Adam settled for a life powered by religion instead of a life powered by the gospel.

This has been the biggest problem of my life. I base my identity on my performance. When I perform well at marriage, fatherhood, my job, cultivating and guarding the garden God has given me, and meeting my goals, I feel good about myself.

I’m happy with my measurements. But when I perform poorly in these spheres, I don’t feel good about myself. I don’t like what the measurements say about me, so I hide, make excuses, and play the blame game.

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Justin Buzzard is the lead pastor of Garden City Church, a new church plant in Silicon Valley. His preaching is featured on Preaching Today. You can also buy his books, Date Your Wife, Why Cities Matter, and Consider Jesus. Click here to view a list of favorite posts from JustinBuzzard.net. Twitter @JustinBuzzard or Facebook

Leading Joe Blow into Mission

All around the world, pastors and church leaders say the same thing. We need more leaders. We speak about these leaders as though God has sent us on a snipe hunt and is laughing at us as we search for these leaders in the bushes. The fact is you have tons of leaders in your church family right now. The key is to lead your people in a way that effectively trains leaders who also train leaders.

I have an interesting perspective on this topic. I am both a preaching elder in our church and the owner of a business.  To put it bluntly, I am busy.  But don’t let me fool you. I am not busier than anybody else. Almost every conversation I have around the coffee and donut table at church goes like this:

Me: How have you been?

The Entire Church (even the 9 year old playing tag):  Busy.

It doesn’t matter if you're speaking to an executive on Wall Street or an executive of the home (props to the stay at home mom), everybody's busy these days. But if you perceive yourself and others as busy, how can leaders ever emerge from your church to lead others on the mission? How can any disciples of Jesus ever be made? Let me suggest some things.

1. Start with the Gospel

I know this seems very Christian of me to say, but the fact is we, and the people we lead, need to be motivated by the good news, not motivated by what we do. God has given us a new identity, changed us from enemies to his children. He did it all by his work, not our effort.

Not only has God done this in justification, but he does this in sanctification. When we are bearing fruit worthy of repentance, it is because it has been through his power and grace, not our merit and works.

I remember sitting under the preaching of Mike Gunn, Jeff Vanderstelt, and Caesar Kalinowski. I was getting “gospelled” each week. It was like God was taking their words and beating the moralism out of my heart. I was so compelled that this good news wasn’t just for yesterday, but for today and tomorrow. My wife and I naturally asked, “How can we make sure everyone around us knows about THIS good news?”

When we hear truly good news, we want to share it and live in the light of it.  If good news is phony, who cares? Meaning, if the gospel was good for us once upon a time (like when we walked down the aisle or raised our hand when everyone had their heads bowed and eyes half shut) but it isn't even better for us today, then that becomes a burden to carry, not a load that we’ve given to the Savior.

Everything you do as a leader/pastor has to start with the gospel motivation of who God is, what God has done, who we are, and what we need to do. When the gospel is correctly and authentically preached, shared, and lived out in community, people will naturally (by the new Spirit) desire to live it out.

2. Have Realistic Goals for Leaders

Imagine what you want a leader to look like in your church. I’m talking about everyone. The single mom, the single dad, the mentally handicapped, the disabled, the CEO, the college students, the children, everyone.

You see most of us - when thinking of leaders - really have a narrow view. For whatever reason, we think a leader must be someone who can preach, know every dark corner of theology, take over Bible studies, and write a thesis on the Nephilim.

Additionally, many pastors think every leader should be just like them. The problem with this thinking is:

1. If you could raise leaders to be like you, you’d be out of a job
2. Your people don’t have time to be like you. That’s why they pay you - to equip them for the point of all ministry.

So, what is realistic for leaders in your church? The answer is simple. They need to do exactly what God has called all of us to do: make disciples of Jesus who make more disciples of Jesus.

Jesus tells us, in short order that making disciples is done by his power and authority (Matt 28; Acts 1:8). He tells us to do this with the term “Go,” which means more accurately “as you go” (Matthew 28), and tells us that we are his body, the parts of which have many different functions. Your people have been designed and formed by how God wants them to be. He has placed them in the place he desires. The power is not by their will but by God’s might and wisdom.

Think of this. If you tell your people that the goal is to make disciples and to do this where they are NOW, how much of a burden have you just released from their shoulders?

To tell the stay at home mom that she can’t live two lives only one and to live this one life for the glory of God, then she can go to the mom’s group and be a light to them. She can invite other moms over and have a play date and befriend them to show them and tell them about Jesus. She’s probably already doing some of these things, but now she is released to do it in the power of the Spirit for the glory of God to make disciples.

Think of the burden released if you don’t have programs in your church where everyone has to attend, but they live their life with the family of God to show off who God is where they are sent.

Instead of telling someone you need to show up for Vacation Bible School to teach for those 5 days from morning until night, you send them back to their neighborhoods and keep doing the things they do, but to do them with non-Christians and Christians, to fully form disciples who then go and make more disciples.

Just ask your people to take an inventory of what they are doing now and have them start thinking how they can start doing those things with the power of the Spirit with the goal of living out the great commission.

All these things can be turned into times of disciple making. (Don’t let this statement fool you, we are always making disciples. It’s just a matter if we are making disciples of us or Jesus.):

• Coaching sport teams
• Work
• Going to the gym
• Neighborhood Parties
• Dinner at your house
• Hanging out in the front yard
• PTA
• Community Events

The list goes on and on.

3. Share Meals

If you want an easy start, given to me by Caesar Kalinowski, tell your people this:

We eat 21 times per week. Each person in each MC eats one meal with a not yet believer twice in a month. That’s two meals out of 84 meals. If a family has another family over that counts as 1 out of 4. Then come together and share about your conversations and start praying like crazy to know what the Spirit would have you do next with each person you've shared a meal with.

The simplicity of this, and the conversations that come from this will show your people what you mean by making disciples and doing it in the everyday.

The point is, when you release your people back to the areas that God has already place them in, then not only do you have job security as a pastor, but people see the importance of the work God has given them. Some may see what they're doing and adjust because of this simple calling, they might move to be more effective. So discuss what's happening with your leaders as they pursue discipleship wherever God places them.

Think of the power of this.  You have stay at home moms, single moms, dads, working parents, college kids, CEOs, garbage men, teachers, politicians, web designers, and accountants all living out the power given to them by the Spirit to make disciples where God has sent them. Doesn't this sound like a fully functioning body that will show off the entirety of Jesus, instead of one small facet?

This is what it means to fill the earth with his glory. Every part of the earth is seeing Jesus because we empower our people, instead of treating them as though they have to be full time pastors to fulfill the job of making disciples.

Start simple. We are told that he who is entrusted with little can be trusted with much. Give them these simple ideas to live out and watch as God calls them to more and more.

Just as you wouldn’t feed an infant steak, neither should we tell our people that to make disciples they must move to Africa in order to make disciples. Let God show them what they should do.

4. Show them how to lead

You can talk about training leaders all day, but if you don't show people how to lead, they’ll never fully grasp it. I believe that you as the pastor cannot do this alone. Know that the people who are not pastors - yet who are already living this out - are your best allies.

Think of this. 99% of your church receives zero income from the church but are still called to make disciples. If this is true, you should be leading them from that perspective, but you also need folks who can lead by example. In other words, instead of saying 99% are not paid to make disciples, we should be saying that 100% of God’s people are paid to make disciples. It’s just a matter of where God directs that money from. (Thank you Jeff Vanderstelt for that gold nugget.)

When you have a missional community meeting and you start going through a study, don’t draw up some study from Leviticus that you created and spend the whole time  preaching at the group. Who else is going to have time for that? What about those who hate speaking to groups? Lead your people in a way where they can say to themselves, “I can do that.”

Look for material that is easily transferrable to everyone. If every time you have some sort of a study in your missional community you are the one writing up the questions and leading the study, how will anyone have time to do the same? Set them an example of what they can do.

Some easily transferrable studies can be found with both Porterbrook and BILD (First Principles). I use them with my missional community and this is exactly why our communities have multiplied. People realized they could lead just like I do. There was nothing overtly difficult or time consuming. We just kept speaking and living in a way that demanded that we learn with our heads, be motivated by the new heart given by the Spirit, and walk it out with our feet empowered by the Spirit.

You can do this with the meeting portion of your missional community as well as in the everyday life of making disciples. If you are always trying to make disciples on Tuesdays between 10-2pm, you’ll alienate most of your church. You’ll get the old “Well, you have time to make disciples because you’re the pastor.”

Know your church and work to “do the mission” in the same time frames that they are able.   And don’t do it alone…ever.  Always be taking people with you or showing it to them as family.   This way your people are not only hearing it from your lips, but experiencing it with their feet.

Your people will learn how to make disciples by the way you make disciples. If you only do it with deep studies in a formal setting, then they’ll think they have to copy you. If you show them you can only make disciples by having BBQ’s every Friday, then they’ll think that the road to gospel living is paved by Weber grills. But, if you can show them that it happens in everyday life, in every facet of life, with all kinds of people, you’ll show them the ways of Jesus.

Jesus wants everyone to make disciples, but we have set up our people for failure because we only want leaders who look like full time paid pastors or professional party throwers. (Both of those are awesome by the way.)

I highly recommend taking a look at Creating a Discipleship Environment. This video can really flesh this out for you and for your people.

So, in the end, how do we find and develop leaders?

• Motivate people with the gospel. Making disciples doesn’t gain your favor or acceptance from God, but is the natural fruit born of a child of God.
• Tell them that God has placed them where they are now, doing what they are doing now, to make disciples by his power
• Show them what you mean by living your life in the way the other 99% of your people can succeed in making disciples.
• Do all this by starting simply with small steps. And wait on God to reveal the next steps for everyone in your community.

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Seth McBee is the adopted son of God, husband of one wife, and father of three. He’s a graduate of Seattle Pacific University with a finance degree. By trade Seth is an Investment Portfolio Manager, serving as president of McBee Advisors, Inc as well as a missional community leader, preaching elder with Soma Communities in Renton, Washington, and executive team member of the GCM Collective. In his down time, he likes to do CrossFit, cook BBQ, and host pancake ebelskiver breakfasts at his home. Twitter @sdmcbee

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For more information on taking the gospel to the streets, check out Jonathan Dodson's Unbelievable Gospel.

For more free articles on missional living read: Invite & Invest to Make Disciples by Greg Gibson, Theology is for Everyone by David Fairchild, and The Gospel & Our Neighbors by Alvin Reid.

Encouraging Leadership

When it comes to leadership, I can be intimidating. At least, that's what people tell me. My engine runs at high RPMs, and I tend to be on the type A side of the personality spectrum. I approach most issues in a black-and-white fashion and pursue excellence. Most leaders exhibit similar characteristics. That's why we're drawn to leadership. People want to follow because you are confident, strong, and know what you want and how to get it. But these characteristics can ruin your people (and you) if you're not careful.

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body. - Prov. 16:24

Leaders can give you a list of ways you can improve. They know the areas that need adjustment, correction, or improvement. This is a necessary ability in leading anything well. They will not long tolerate the status quo, or the organization becomes stagnant, and we all know what happens to water when it remains stagnant. It starts to stink.

However, if this is true, how can we lead well without constantly harping on our people? Herein lies the power of encouragement.

The concept of withdrawals and deposits has been helpful for me when it comes to excellence in leadership. You will inevitably have tough conversations with those under your direction - you know, those conversations that start, "Hey Mike, can we chat about something?" You both know that you are about to take a relational withdrawal from him in the form of a suggestion for how Mike needs to grow, change, repent, or whatever. But, following the bank analogy, is there money in the bank from which to draw? Or is your relational/leadership check going to bounce?

Money is deposited into the leadership bank via encouragement. If there is no consistent deposit into the bank of Mike's life, he is going to burn out quickly, grow to hate you, or simply leave the relationship without warning.

Encouraging Leadership

There are three areas in my life that need my continual focus on encouragement: my wife, my kids, and the people under my care at The Vine. Recently, my wife and I have been talking about our oldest child and his need for constant correction. He is having a bit of a bad attitude about school, and it seems to be a persistent thorn in my wife's side as she homeschools. She feels like she has to be "on him" all the time.

We chatted about this concept of deposits and withdrawals and renewed our focus on making deposits of encouragement in our children. If all they hear is correction with no words of encouragement we run the danger of provoking them to anger (Eph. 6:4).

Think of people who have led you in the past. Who are those leaders you loved following? I would be willing to bet that for most of you, the leaders you most loved were those who excelled at encouraging you even as they challenged you to grow.

Now think of those people who have lead you in the past who you didn't exactly enjoy following. I would be willing to bet that those leaders were probably not strong in the encouragement department.

Growing as an Encourager

Obviously, this is a simple concept but quite difficult to master. To grow as an encourager, consider three actions points to implement in your rhythms of life and leadership:

• When you walk into a room with your spouse, your kids, or those under your care at church - really, any leadership setting - try and make a discipline out of speaking words of encouragement in short bursts of improvised blessing. Just make a habit out of it. Make the first thing that comes out of your mouth a simple word of encouragement.

• Many years ago at a conference, I remember Bill Hybels saying that every day when he came into the office he would start the day by writing out five hand-written notes of encouragement to five of the hundreds of people who were under his pastoral authority. This stuck with me for a reason. It's powerful.

• Have parties with your people. And when you do, make a habit of publicly blessing those under your care with words of life in the presence of all those gathered. This will set an amazing tone for the whole group and the person being recognized will be immensely blessed.

What other ways could you think of?

As a leader, withdrawals are going to be necessary. Are you making sure there is money in the bank? In what ways could you be a much more effective leader by pursing continual encouragement of the people under your care?

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up. - 1 Thess. 5:11

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Zach Nielsen is one of the pastors at The Vine Church in Madison, Wisconsin, where he serves in the areas of preaching, leadership development and music. He is a graduate of the University of Northern Iowa and Covenant Theological Seminary and blogs at Take Your Vitamin Z. Twitter: @znielsen

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For more resources on leadership, check out Tony Merida's eBook Proclaiming Jesus.

For more free articles on leadership, read: Spiritual Strength Training by David Murray, The Gospel Grid by Jeff Medders, and 5 Ways to Keep Church Discipline from Seeming Weird by Jared Wilson.

Laying Foundations for Spiritual Growth

When my two sons were young we went to Atlanta for the groundbreaking of one of the more famous skyscrapers. We had been reading about the project for months in the local papers and were excited to watch the construction of the “tallest building in the South”. As we arrived on the scene, the bulldozers were already clearing the site, but there was a viewing area for spectators with an architectural rendering of the completed structure emblazoned on the side of the construction fencing. “Wow!” my oldest exclaimed, “It’s humongous!” And indeed it was, soaring nearly seventy stories above Peachtree Street, it certainly promised to be a focal point of the city skyline. We faithfully trekked to the site and watched trucks haul away dirt and debris while other trucks delivered steel girders and other building materials. After several weeks of this vigil, one of the boys exclaimed in frustration, “Dad, when are they going to start working on the building?” (It was a question that I had pondered myself, because all that existed was a large hole and lots of mud.) Approaching a worker with a set of plans under his arm, I inquired, “Can you give us some idea when the building is going to begin?” His chuckle made it obvious the question had come up before. “It’s hard to believe it,” he said, “but this hole is the most important part of the building. We have to dig down several hundred feet and build a solid foundation to support a structure that’s over seventy stories tall. It will take several months to pour the concrete and sink the steel pillars, but then we’ll start going up. Once we start, it will rise pretty fast!”

The Bible compares living the Christian life with constructing a building. Just as there are phases in building a building, there are phases in the growth of a Christian, and the first phase is: “laying a foundation.” Our initial salvation experience is the beginning of a process of growth that lasts a lifetime. The success of our spiritual growth is determined by the strength of our spiritual foundation. Matthew 7: 24-27 asserts that the Christian life built on a solid foundation will withstand the storms of life. The tallest building in the South is still standing today. Believers who lay solid foundations are more likely to stand tall than those who fail to establish a solid base for growth. This foundations phase actually consists of four interconnecting parts:

1. relating to God,
2. relating to other Christians,
3. understanding truth, and
4. applying truth so that it transforms us.

Let’s explore these together!

Relating to God

Unlike other religions, the essence of Christianity is a relationship with God, not a set of rules. In John 17: 3 the Scripture affirms that eternal life is all about knowing God. It is thrilling to remember that God desires a relationship with us that will never end. The great news is that believers don’t have to wait for heaven to experience this. It begins the moment we accept Christ!

Having a relationship with God is not all that different from having a relationship with anyone else. As we relate to others, we get to know them better and the relationship deepens over time. There are specific situations that will help believers better experience a relationship with God. The first of these involves setting aside time for personal devotions, a quiet time each day devoted to prayer, Bible reading, and personal meditation. The Scripture promises in James 4: 8 that as we “come near to God, he will come near to us”. This “coming near to God” is not a religious duty, but a time for relational development. Of course just as good disciplines and habits can be beneficial in other areas of life, the more we remain faithfully committed to our quiet time, the more benefit we derive from it.

Another aspect of developing a relationship with God is attending public worship in a church that exalts him. Although we can worship God any place, any time, worshipping with other Christians deepens and develops our ability to relate to God. There are many different public worship experiences and not all churches structure them in the same way.

Worship that focuses on the greatness of God and includes times of singing praise, prayerful meditation, and Biblical preaching should be a priority. Ask God to help you find a church in your community and become a part of the fellowship. This leads to another important part of laying a good foundation: relating to other Christians.

Relating to Other Christians

God has placed us in his spiritual family, the Church, to encourage us, protect us, correct us, direct us, and provide for us. Again there are specific situations that help believers experience relationships with other Christians. Each of these plays a unique role in helping to form a spiritual foundation and each will require some effort. But they all are incredibly beneficial. Christians who do not have connections with other Christians tend to stop growing. (cf. Hebrews 10: 24-25)

In the first century there were very few church buildings. Mostly the believers met together in private homes for Bible teaching, prayer, and fellowship. There are benefits to meeting with large groups in public worship, but there is also an advantage gained from being part of a small group. The intimacy of the setting provides a place for relationships to flourish. Many modern believers have learned that meeting together in small groups helps to forge close relationships as members discuss Scripture, pray for each other, and share personal matters.

The term “mentoring” was coined by the modern business community to describe a relationship where a seasoned executive tutors a younger colleague in commercial practices. But long before mentoring was introduced to the world of commerce, it had already existed in the spiritual community as “one-to-one discipleship”.

In this case it describes an intentional relationship between a young believer and a more mature Christian who models the Christian life, answers questions, gives counsel, and helps the younger Christian stay focused on the priorities of spiritual growth.

Understanding Truth

One important priority for growth (and the third part of laying good foundations) involves developing an increasing understanding of God’s truth. The Bible is the Book of Truth for Christians, but it can appear overwhelming to a new learner. It was Jesus who proclaimed that knowing truth sets people free from the bondage of sin. Therefore, it is helpful to have a basic plan of study for learning the truths that we need to build upon, a plan that focuses on specific themes and principles of foundational development. A good beginning series of studies for young believers should include the themes mentioned earlier: truth that helps someone to know more about God, truth that helps people understand other people, and truth that helps someone to grow spiritually.

There are specific approaches to gaining an understanding of these foundational truths. The first is a curriculum of systematic instruction. This is the first of a series of “Pocket Principles” that are designed specifically for helping new believers lay solid spiritual foundations. If you received this “Pocket Principle” from a mentor or small group leader, continue to work closely with that person to discover and apply the other truths in this series.

Another way of gaining insights into living the Christian life is by reading. There are many excellent materials and resources available in Christian bookstores, libraries, and on the Internet. Your own informal reading will supplement your spiritual growth. But be sure to focus on the foundational themes mentioned above as a starting point.

Your local church is also an excellent source of content. Besides the weekly sermon delivered by the pastor or other teacher, many churches offer small groups devoted to helping new believers get established in the faith. Consult the churches in your area for opportunities to learn foundational truths.

Applying Truth

But as important as truth is in the growth process, it is not the information alone that transforms us. In fact other parts of Scripture warn us that knowledge by itself can be dangerous, leading to spiritual pride and the deadening of our hearts to God. This particular sin characterized the Pharisees who were enemies of Christ. It is only truth that is obeyed or applied to our lives that changes us and causes growth. Romans 12: 2 reminds us that it is a life consecrated to obeying God that is impacted by truth. When our minds are transformed in this way we help establish the will of God on earth. This is more than just knowing the truth, it is actually doing truth.

A skyscraper is an engineering marvel, but soaring high means digging deep and laying solid foundations. A maxim of the Christian life asserts that “you can only grow as tall as you grow deep”. Laying good foundations takes time and effort, but the benefits are worth it. The new believer needs to embrace experientially the truths related to knowing and understanding God and other believers.

The Foundations of Spiritual Growth

Applying truth will require becoming involved in specific situations that facilitate foundational growth. Establishing a time for personal devotions, joining a small group, locating an older believer who can come alongside you as an encouraging mentor, setting up a systematic plan of study , and participating in public worship are layers of spiritual brick and mortar that form this foundation. But these situations without a heart commitment to obey the truth will not suffice. Blessings to you as you grow!

• So where are you laying foundations?
• Where do you find is the best place to find a mentor?
• Have you made time for studying God’s word?
• What are some of the things you have done to help lay foundations for growing in your faith as a Christian?

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Robert D. (Bob) Dukes is the President and Executive Director of Worldwide Discipleship Association (WDA*) headquartered in Fayetteville, Georgia. He is the author/co-author of many educational publications and articles including: A Biblical Framework for Disciple Building; A Practical Strategy for Disciple Building; Disciple Building for Small Groups; and Disciple Building for Life Coaches.  He serves as a founding member of The Steering Committee for The Pierce Center for Disciple Building at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary in Boston, MA.

WDA is an international training organization specializing in Christian discipleship. WDA establishes interdenominational training centers on university campuses, seminaries, and in communities around the world, and forges partnerships with other Christian organizations. WDA staff and associates equip current and emerging generations of leaders, and offer seminars and training resources to help local churches develop progressive discipleship strategies.

Editor's Note: This article is reposted with permission from WDA's Laying Foundations. This is the first Pocket Principle in the Knowing God Series. For more resources on digging deeper into a creative & restorative relationship with God through the gospel of Christ, check out Grow: Reproducing Through Organic Discipleship by Winfield Bevins. For more free articles of applying the gospel to your everyday life, read: Making Disciples is Not Just for Super Christians by Nathan Creitz, Meditating on God's Word - Memorization by Tony Merida, & Discipling the Disillusioned by Andrew Byers.

Spiritual Strength Training - Part Two

(Editor's note: Here's Spiritual Strength Training - Part One.)

The 7 R’s of Soul Care & Maintenance

Having set the practice of Soul Care and Spiritual Strength Training in the context of the Creator/Creature relationship, I now want to take you to seven “Service Bays” in the “Soul Care Garage.” As with your car, if you regularly service your soul, you’re far less likely to experience burnout, breakdown, or a crash.

But what if you’ve failed to service your soul? What if you’ve hit the wall, crashed, and burned? Well you need to visit the same seven Service Bays. You just need to spend longer in each of them.

Service Bay 1: Routine

Regular routine is one of the first things to fall by the wayside when we become too busy. We respond to increasing ministry demands by increasing our accessibility and availability. Our regular daily routine is squeezed, then disrupted, and then displaced.

We end up feeling like passive victims waiting for things to happen – emails to arrive, phones to ring, and requests for help to knock on the door. We are knocked from pillar to post, running from one crisis to another.

Even when we get some quiet, uninterrupted time, we are so tired and wrung-out that we lack the will and discipline to use that time wisely and well. We end up doing only what we feel like doing – which is not very much – as our wills and decisiveness are so weakened.

The first question I ask burned-out pastors is: “Tell me your daily routine.” Usually the answer is “I don’t have one… Every day is different.” I press further, “Is there nothing constant from one day to another?” Again, usually the answer is “No.”

The first thing I do is to get them to draw up a basic routine of sleeping, worshipping, eating, studying, etc. that they then commit to. God is a God of order, not of confusion (1 Cor. 14:33), and as his created image-bearers we glorify him when we live regular, orderly lives. He has made our bodies so that they flourish when they have a rhythm and regularity.

Now, of course, there are elements of ministry that we cannot predict or regulate, but we can usually do a lot more than we presently are regulating. Start with regular bed times and rise times. Read and pray in the same place at the same time each day, preferably in privacy, and before you see or speak to anyone else. Set family meal times and stick to them. The more regularity you can build into your day and your week, the more your body, mind, and soul will flourish.

Service Bay 2: Relaxation

We need to incorporate times of relaxation into our lives. This may involve finding a quiet spot at regular times throughout the day to simply pause for 5-10 minutes, calm down, and seek the peace of God in our lives. Unstretch the band, let the tension go, breathe deeply, pray, and remember God.

Jesus recognized his disciples need for relaxation when he took them “apart into a desert place, and rested a while” (Mark 6:31).

You’ll find lots of websites and books that outline many varied relaxation techniques. These are usually effective and easy to learn. Once you try some of these you’ll soon learn how tense you actually are. Many of us are living like a flexed muscle, coiled tight from tip-to-toe. Is it any wonder that we’re exhausted and feel aches and pains all over?

Many of us actually need to learn how to breathe properly again. When we are stressed, anxious, and tense, our breathing becomes shallow, starving our body and brain of oxygen, increasing the difficulty of physical and intellectual work. Again, websites abound with exercises that will help you to become conscious of your breathing habits and re-train them if you’ve learned bad habits.

As I mentioned before, creative breakthroughs are often made in quiet downtimes. I believe many preachers could do with working less on their sermons. What I mean by that is getting away from the commentaries and the computer and communing with God in quiet reflective walks. There are computer sermons, and there are communion sermons! There are sermons that collate others thoughts, and there are sermons that flow out of communion with God in his Word.

Service Bay 3: Recreation

Bodily exercise is profitable. Moderate physical exercise helps to expel unhealthy chemicals from our system and stimulates the production of helpful chemicals. Outdoor exercise has the added benefit of the sun’s healing rays. Spurgeon said: “The next best thing to the grace of God for a preacher is oxygen.”

John Wesley attributed his great age and remarkable usefulness even in his eighties to God’s power, prayer, and his regular exercise in the fresh air! William Blaikie said: “It is very certain that due attention to physical exercise is an essential condition of sustained vigorous preaching. The command to be “strong in the Lord” includes strength of body as well of strength of soul.”

Is God glorified in our bodies (1 Cor. 6:20) when we rob them of what they need to function properly? Do we glorify our Creator when we remain willingly ignorant of or reject the knowledge he has kindly provided in his created order, information that we need to keep our bodies healthy?

Service Bay 4: Rest

A Christian psychologist recently said to me that he starts most depressed people on three pills: “Good exercise, good diet, and good sleep!” That’s great advice, and I would encourage you to make use of the plentiful resources available today on these subjects.

As regular sleep patterns enable the body and mind to repair and re-charge, set fixed times for going to bed and getting up, and try to get a minimum of seven (and an ideal of eight hours) of sleep per night.

Remember God’s gift of weekly rest. Secure a weekly intellectual Sabbath to refresh your mind. The devotion of one day to rest will not lose you time but rather help you to gain it as the other days will be more decisive and vigorous.

My wife has forced me to take one day off a week throughout my ministry. Usually it was a Monday as we were home-schooling. Perhaps twice I managed to persuade her that I really needed to work on my day of rest. Both weeks were a disaster. Overall I accomplished less than I would have had I taken the day off and properly rested my body and mind.

It doesn’t say, “Six days you shall labor… unless you are a pastor who must work seven.” It’s a command. "Six days you shall labor, but the seventh is to be a Sabbath of rest.” It takes faith to obey this. Reason and society says, “If you work seven days, you’ll get more done!” But as you practice weekly Sabbath, you will begin to see how gracious, merciful, and wise God’s commands are.

Service Bay 5: Reprioritize

As our lives slowly yet inexorably grow more complicated and committed, especially in the ministry, we must regularly examine our life and see what we can do to reduce our commitments and obligations. We all do this to some extent – because we all realize that we cannot meet the needs of everyone – the question is more about how seriously and intentionally you do this.

Prevention is better than cure here. If you can learn to say “No” to certain ministry demands and opportunities, it’s a lot easier than having to pull out when you’ve already committed and raised expectations.

You will need to cut out many good things to do the best things. You will need to cut out some ministry to others in order to minister to yourself. The life of the minister is the life of his ministry (Acts 20:28; 1 Tim. 4:6). What’s your greatest priority? YOUR SOUL!

A pastor's duties to his wife and children are not reduced by his duty to his flock. Rather, they are increased (1 Sam. 15:22-23).

Service Bay 6: Re-think

The final two R’s are especially important for those who feel that they’ve crash and burned.

One of the most common signs of burnout or depression is unhelpful thought patterns, which tend to distort our view of reality in a false and negative way. As the writers of Mind over Mood put it, “Our perception of an event or experience powerfully affects our emotional, behavioral, and physiological responses to it.” Or, as the Bible puts it: “As [a man] thinks in his heart, so is he” (Prov. 23:7).

In my book, Christians Get Depressed Too, I describe 10 false thought patterns that reflect, but also contribute to, the symptoms of depression. Here’s a summary of some of them:

False extremes: This is a tendency to evaluate personal qualities in extreme, black-and-white categories. Shades of gray do not exist. This is sometimes called all-or-nothing thinking.

• Life example: You make one mistake in preaching a sermon conclude you are a total disaster.
• Biblical example: Despite most of his life being characterized by God’s blessing and prosperity, when Job passed through a time of suffering, he decided he must be an enemy of God (Job 13:24; 33:10).

False generalization: This happens when, after experiencing one unpleasant event, we conclude that the same thing will happen to us again and again.

• Life example: When you try to witness to someone, you are mocked, and you conclude that this will always happen to you and that you will never win a soul for Christ.
• Biblical example: At a low point in his own life, Jacob deduced that because Joseph was dead and Simeon was captive in Egypt that Benjamin would also be taken from him: “All these things are against me,” he generalized.

False filter: When we are depressed, we tend to pick out the negative in every situation and think about it alone, to the exclusion of everything else. We filter out anything positive and decide everything is negative.

• Life example: You heard something in a sermon you did not like or agree with and went home thinking and talking only about that part of the service.
• Biblical example: Despite having just seen God’s mighty and miraculous intervention on Mount Carmel, Elijah filtered out all the positives and focused only on the continued opposition of Ahab and Jezebel (1 Kings 19:10).

False transformation: We transform neutral or positive experiences into negative ones. The depressed person doesn’t ignore positive experiences. Rather, he or she disqualifies them or turns them into their opposite.

• Life example: If someone compliments you, you conclude that the person is just being hypocritical or that he or she is trying to get something from you.
• Biblical example: Jonah saw many Ninevites repent in response to his preaching. But in- stead of rejoicing in this positive experience, his mood slumped so low that he angrily asked God to take away his life (Jonah 4:3–4).

False mind reading: We may think that we can tell what someone is thinking about us, that the person hates us or views us as stupid. But such negative conclusions usually are not supported by the facts.

• Life example: Someone who used to talk to you at church now passes you with hardly a word, so you decide that you have fallen out of her favor. But, unknown to you, the person’s marriage is in deep trouble, and she is too embarrassed to risk talking to anyone.
• Biblical example: The psalmist one day concluded that all men were liars. On reflection, he admitted that this judgment was overly hasty (Ps. 116:11).

A couple more, quickly, in summary form:

False lens: This is when we view our fears, errors, or mistakes through a magnifying glass and deduce catastrophic consequences. Everything then is out of proportion. The other side of this is that while you maximize your faults with a magnifying glass, you also tend to look through the binoculars the wrong way when it comes to your assets—and minimize them.

False “shoulds”: Our lives may be dominated by “shoulds” or “oughts,” applied to ourselves or others. This heaps pressure on us and others to reach certain unattainable standards and causes frustration and resentment when we fail or when others fail us.

Step-by-Step Guide Out of False Thinking

These false thinking patterns are not only the symptoms of burnout and depression, they perpetuate and deepen them. They eventually cause physical symptoms, too. So, let me propose a biblical method that will help you to correct these false and damaging thought habits. And they are habits. We get into deep ruts in our thinking that are sometimes very difficult to get out of.

We must first identify false and unhelpful thought-patterns, then challenge them, and then change them. This isn’t optional: Christians are obliged to challenge falsehood and distortions of reality, especially when they find them in themselves.

Psalm 77 is a perfect example of Asaph’s investigating, challenging, and changing his thoughts, with God’s help, in order to raise his mood and spirits. There are also slightly more abbreviated versions of the same biblical strategy in Job 19, Psalm 42, 73, and Habakkuk 3. So, this is not “psychological mumbo-jumbo,” but true Bible-based Christian experience. In Christians Get Depressed Too, I go into this Biblical Re-thinking Training in much more detail.

Service Bay 7: Return

The aim of all these other service bays is a return to a Christ-centered life, a life lived in communion with the Lord Jesus. Yes, dare I say it, a personal relationship with Jesus. We want a life connected to him, obedient to him, imaging him, glorifying him, and worshipping him. Here are a few things I’ve found helpful in returning to the Lord:

• Guard personal Bible reading and prayer time as jealously as you guard your own children.
• Pray out loud. Find a place where you can pray out loud without embarrassment. Hearing your own prayers helps to improve the clarity and intensity of prayer.
• Make singing part of your personal and family devotions.
• Carve out uninterrupted study time in 2-3 hour blocks at least four days a week.
• Read Christ-centered books. Don’t let your love of missiology, ecclesiology, eschatology, apologetics, evangelism, etc. push out daily personal communion with Christ. Why not start with John Owen, Volume 1 on the Glory of Christ, or Volume 7 on Spiritual Mindedness; John Flavel, Volume 1 on Christ the Fountain of Life.
• Read for your own soul rather than for ministry to others. It makes a big difference to the personal edification you get from reading if, from time-to-time, you determine that you will not use anything in a certain book for ministry purposes.
• Listen to Christ-centered sermons from various pastors. We have a wealth of online resources at sites such as SermonAudio.com. I like to listen to preachers outside my own tradition as I often find their approach to texts quite refreshing and stimulating.
• Disconnect from Twitter, Facebook, email for several hours at a time. Discipline yourself to check the internet only a certain number of times a day.
• Seek accountability with another pastor or elder. Read through the 7 R’s, agree on parameters, and commit to regular accounting.

Please visit the Soul Care Garage regularly. The more frequently you visit it, the less time you will spend in each of the service bays. It will save you from the Pastor’s wrecker’s yard, and if you’re already there, get a tow over to this garage and start working your way through the bays until you’re fit for the road again!

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David Murray was a pastor in Scotland for 13 years before accepting a call in 2007 to be Professor of Old Testament and Practical Theology in Puritan Reformed Seminary. He continues to preach most Sundays in Grand Rapids and the surrounding area. He is the author of Christians Get Depressed Too and How Sermons Work. He is also President of HeadHeartHand Media, a small Christian film company. David is married to Shona and they have four children ranging from 8 to 16. You can read his blog at HeadHeartHand.org/blog or follow him on Twitter @davidpmurray.

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For more in-depth resources for pastors, check out Tony Merida's Proclaiming Jesus.

For more free articles for pastors, read: Winfield Bevins' What is Gospel-Centered Ministry, JR Vassar's Domain of Influence, Jared Wilson's Five Ways to Keep Church Discipline from Seeming Weird.

A Child's Gospel

(Editor’s Note: This is the third article of a three part series entitled Kids in the Family of God. Here is Part One and Part Two.) I don’t think it’s biased to say my 23-1/2 month-old daughter is the cutest child God ever created. (Though she may be rivaled in two weeks when our second kiddo is born.) But coupling that statement with biblical truth, I should rightly say, “She’s the cutest little ball of depravity ever created!” From as early as three months, we knew our daughter was selfish, self-serving, and self-focused. Honestly, how could she be anything else!?

As she’s grown, and as we lovingly discipline her, we’re learning to speak not of good or bad - of “trying hard” and succeeding and failing. Instead, we speak of obedience and authority and discipline. As parents, we try (though we often fail) to reflect the loving-parent-ness of God when we explain to her – whether she can understand or not – that we know what’s best for her, and even if it hurts her feelings, she needs to obey because God put us in her life to reflect him.

By engaging kids, we see brokenness restored, over and over and over.

When we see her move from disobedience to obedience, we see an echo of the gospel. Humanity was created to obey. Our fallen nature pulls us to disobey. Her obedience is common grace as God turns her heart to listen and act.

When we lovingly have those corrective conversations in our community, two things occur: first, we display gospel-focused discipline for other parents and for those who will be parents one day. We learn from other parents in their loving discipline as well. Second, no matter what someone’s family history is, or how they were raised and disciplined, our community experiences together what it means to address the heart in our own disobedience. While we encourage our community not to carry out discipline in front of others, we do have these corrective conversations, and doing so has led to great discussions on our own tendencies, and our need for God to change our own hearts.

Corrective discipline is just one example of seeing brokenness restored in our children. When one child hurts another (intentionally or otherwise), we see forgiveness asked and granted, and a relationship restored. Even thinking on physical restoration, kids seem to get sick, bloody, stubbed, and bonked far more and far easier than grown-ups. But they also seem to bounce back with far more ease than our aged bodies do!

In seeing health restored after sickness, in seeing black and blue toes return to normal, even in seeing teary eyes turn into joyful squeals, we see brokenness restored. In the same way that Jesus’ physical healing pointed toward his spiritual work, all of these little restorations are echoes of the objective reality of God’s restorative work in his creation. Paul explains this in his letter to the Colossians: “For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.” (Colossians 1:19-20).

Raising kids in the family of God allows you to see these things often - in your own children and in others.

Kids’ Need for You - Your Need for God

Most of us are familiar with verses like “I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it” (Luke 18:17) and “Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:4). But when we really stop to think of what these verses mean, we see the gospel echoed in the life of a child.

Think of what a baby is able to do. Nothing. Young children are completely reliant on something outside of themselves: to provide for them, to nourish them, to care for them, to teach them, to do everything for them. Think of an elementary child. They’ve figured out how to walk and feed themselves, but they’re full of questions. They don’t know “this” or “that,” and they turn to someone “greater than themselves” (to use overly-obvious language for the metaphor I’m getting at) for answers. Even the rebellious teenager still needs Mom and Dad far more than they let on, and if the relationship is healthy, even adult children ask their parents for advice.

“Receiving the kingdom… like a little child” speaks of our great need - our inability to receive the kingdom by attaining it, by self-reliance, by our own work, action, and volition. We need something outside ourselves and greater than ourselves to deliver the kingdom to us. The only position we’re able to take before our heavenly Father is “humble… like a child” – full of nothing but a desperate need for God the Spirit to convict us of sin, enact his salvation, and continually apply the truth of our inability to areas of sin, selfishness, and evil. In objective salvation and in ongoing discipleship, children remind us of our need for God. Because whatever it is, without his work in and through us, we can’t do it.

Parents have the blessing of seeing this day in and day out. But as our entire church participates with our children, in communities and during gatherings, everyone can see reflections of our own position before God. Whether providing snacks, rocking to sleep, drying tears, opening a jar, cleaning up a spill, leading a song, saying a prayer, changing a diaper, picking up a toy, protecting against allergies, praying for, or otherwise serving our kids, we’re reminded of our great childlike need as we meet the needs of children.

Breaking idols

This has been alluded to already in this series of posts, but a third way we see the gospel is to realize that raising kids in the family of God reveals our hearts, and reveals our idols. Here are just a few examples:

• Embarrassment by a kid running, or making a noise, in a gathering of the church, might display a “fear of man” idol – you care more than you should, about what “they” think of you and your parenting.
• Annoyance with a child’s comment during a community meeting might display a lack of patience, which might be a control issue and/or selfishness over (in your mind) the “wasted time.”
• Stifling your child’s comments, for fear of what they might say, might be another control issue, as you distrust that God’s sovereign goodness extends even to your child – even if that means God uses your kid’s comment to humble you!
• Many parents don’t want other parents to speak into their family. While some advice-giving is ill-placed, self-sufficiency and pride is revealed in disregarding, or disallowing, godly counsel and wisdom from folks who are removed from your family’s daily patterns and rhythms. (One of the greatest parenting rebukes we’ve received was from a college guy – I despised him for a moment “what right do you have…” but he was removed enough to see objectively what I couldn’t!)
• Harsh words that slip out toward your child might reveal your lacking understanding of grace or at least your lack of displaying that grace.

What is revealed about how you treat your kids and the kids in your community?

I close this posts with wise words from Tim Chester:

"In You Can Change [Crossway, 2010] I identify four truths about God (the four Gs as some have characterized them):

• God is great – so we don’t have to be in control
• God is glorious – so we don’t have to fear others
• God is good – so we don’t have to look elsewhere
• God is gracious – so we don’t have to prove ourselves

“All our sinful behavioural and negative emotions stem from a failure at a functional level to believe one of these truths. So they’re a great diagnostic tool – both for ourselves and when pastoring others. But more importantly, they offer hope. Learning to have faith in these areas offers the real prospect of change through faith. It means we are speaking good news to people and that’s what we’re after – gospel-centred change. Legalism says, ‘You must not . . .’ The gospel says, ‘You need not . . . because God is bigger and better than sin.’"

Beyond biblical principles to follow and beyond experiential practice, the heart of raising kids in the family of God is that – in parents, in community members, in attendees of the church gathering, and in anyone else who participates in the corporate life – God uses children as one very-easy-to-see-way to reveal our idols. Through children, he shines a light on our selfishness. Through children, he shows our need for grace when we fail our children and other parents. And through children, he consistently points us toward the unquenchable need to “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure” (Philippians 2:12-13).

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Ben Connelly lives in Fort Worth, TX, with his wife and daughter (with another on the way this fall). He started The City Church in 2010 and lives on mission by teaching public speaking at TCU. Ben sits on the board of a few city-focused organizations, trains occasionally across the country, and writes at benconnelly.net. Twitter: @connellyben

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Parents, for more resources on discipling your children at home, check out Winfield Bevin's Beginner's Guide to Family Worship.