Fathers, We Need the Gospel
Growing up as an athlete in Central Kentucky I saw that many parents were more zealous for little league athletes than they were for the faith they professed. This is not to say they weren’t true Christians or didn’t attend the Sunday morning gathering. However, the sermon outline they preached with their lives looked a lot like this:
“The Three Cs of Fatherhood”
Cultivate athletes or scholars.
Create fun opportunities for your children.
Come to church on occasion.
Sadly, this is the reality for many fathers today. Too many wives and mothers drag their children to church without their husbands. She begs him to skip out the yard work. She prays fervently for him to come with her to the weeknight small group. If she could get him to lead family devotions even once a week, her eyes would well up with tears.
But she perseveres week after week, praying, and hoping.
Why do women make up approximately 61% of our congregations nationwide? Why are fewer men and fathers attending a local church? The answers vary but filling the pews with more men isn’t the answer if their hearts haven’t been made new through the work of the Holy Spirit.
“Men must not simply show up to the building, they must also know Christ and live in obedience to their God-given purpose.”
Fathers face a critical moment in our culture today, and the social and spiritual consequences carry eternal significance. Filling the pews on Sunday may make us feel better, but it won’t inherently change sinful hearts. Only the good news of the gospel can bring the true transformation we long to see in our culture. Men must not simply show up to the building, they must also know Christ and live in obedience to their God-given purpose.
Where Have All the Fathers Gone?
Fathers, we need to be leading our families through Scripture, flipping through children’s books, and tucking our kids in at night. Our children need to hear the gospel preached and see God’s power in our homes every day. Little boys long to see their father pursue his wife in ways that movies refuse to portray, and our dear daughters yearn to see a man who models the biblical standards they’ll one day seek in a husband.
The world needs fathers whose lives have been dramatically shaped by the gospel. Are you doing your part?
Fatherhood is not a DYI project. There aren’t ten steps or five keys to becoming a godly dad. Godly fathers are not self-made men, and to believe otherwise is a fatal misconception. Rather, becoming a godly father is often a grueling roller coaster of failures and successes that continually draw us back to the cross of Christ as we seek his face and transforming grace.
Put simply, we need the gospel.
Reasons Father’s Need the Gospel
Without the gospel, we are dead in our sins. Christ alone brings redemption through his blood (Eph. 1:7), and we are all sinners who have earned the wages of death. Only in Christ can we receive forgiveness for yelling at our kids, neglecting their souls, or being too busy. Until we believe the gospel and trust in Christ, we remain dead (Eph. 2:1). Not paralyzed. Not weak. Dead. Dead people don’t fix themselves, and a surefire way to destroy your home is to look deep inside yourself for the discipline and willpower to be a better dad.
Without the gospel, we are spiritually fatherless. Through Christ, believers have access in one Spirit to the Father (Eph. 2:18). The spirit of adoption in us cries out, “Abba, Father” to remind us that we are God’s children. As a child of God, you have a loving, caring Father who loves you enough to send his Son to die on the cross for you. God is merciful, gracious, slow to anger, abounding in steadfast love, and faithful toward his children (Ps. 86:15). If you are not God’s child, you are a spiritual orphan.
“Only in Christ can we receive forgiveness for yelling at our kids, neglecting their souls, or being too busy.”
Without the gospel, we have no power. If you want to live a powerless life, live a gospel-less life. You may be able to go to work, pay the bills, and berate your family into submission, but you’ll never have the power to be a godly father. You’re weak and deficient at worst and self-congratulatory and prideful at best. Worst of all, you’ll never be able to obey the clear biblical commands from a heart that exalts God first and foremost. Left to yourself, you can do nothing (John 15:5).
Without the gospel, our message is hypocritical. Without believing the gospel yourself, you walk in contradiction each time you call your children to believe the gospel. You can tell them to love God, but you can’t love him yourself. You aren’t being strengthened to understand the love of Christ that surpasses all understanding. Even a vast theological library and expansive knowledge of Scripture won’t be enough to show your children the power of the gospel in your life. Only God can. He does this as you behold Christ and his Spirit transforms you from the inside out (2 Cor. 3:18). Without the gospel, your life will be that of a graceless hypocrite.
Without the gospel, we’ll have no victory in spiritual warfare. Since the Garden of Eden, Satan ceaselessly wages war on our souls, our families, and our communities. Unarmed and unguarded against our spiritual enemy, we are in a terrifying place. In Christ, we are guaranteed victory over sin, Satan, and death—though that victory will only be fully realized at the return of Christ. Not only did Jesus disarm Satan and his fallen angels, but he has also already marched them around in a victory march broadcasting their shame (Col. 2:15). He has triumphed over them in his resurrection. Arming yourself with only physical weaponry puts you in a losing battle on the defeated team.
Run to Jesus
If you haven’t picked up on it yet, you need the triune God to make you the father you want to be. If you don’t desire to be a godly father, beg the Lord to give you right desires. The greatest need for you and for your children is that you know Christ and point them to him! Don’t try harder in your own strength. You need to drop to the feet of Jesus and cry out for help. Don’t bruise yourself and wallow in the mire of your failures. Instead, set your eyes on the One who bore the cross and despised its shame. Cling to this great Savior who brings forgiveness only through his name!
Take your fatherhood successes and failures to God in prayer. Confess your sins to God and earnestly seek forgiveness. Turn from your insufficient fatherhood and cling to the heavenly Father who put perfect fatherhood on display. Pour over the Scriptures as the Spirit convicts you to be the father God has called you to be.
Fathers, we are needed, and we need the gospel.
Chrys Jones lives in central Kentucky with his wife, Kim, and their four daughters. Chrys is preparing to plant a church through Bardstown Christian Fellowship and is serving as pastoral resident at Grace Church in Danville, KY. He is also a producer, rapper, and sound engineer for Christcentric Records. You can follow Chrys on Twitter or check out his blog.