The Mission of Holiday Presence
When it comes to the holidays, I have such good intentions—I really do. I picture a clean house, amazing meals, beating my kids in a game of Rummikub, and pulling out our Jesse Tree to begin the Advent countdown. In preparation for all of this, I imagine myself making good food choices, deep cleaning my fridge, decluttering my home, and freezing breakfast burritos and other pastries to have on hand for out-of-town guests. But somehow my calendar gets crowded, I overextend myself, and I start opting out of my priorities because they feel like “too much work” and “just one more thing.” My best intentions are gone as quickly as my kids’ Halloween candy.
My optimistic yet passive approach to the holidays gets me every year. Around the third week of November, my good intentions collide head-on with my unmet expectations. Family dynamics, triggering conversations, and social stressors leave me wanting. My vision for “holiday thriving” is reduced to “holiday surviving.” My desire to serve and nurture is overcome by self-protection and judgmentalism.
If you’re like me, the call to engage in God’s mission amidst managing family dysfunction, work deadlines, and stacked Friendsgiving gatherings can fall on deaf ears. If we’re honest, loving and serving our neighbors—even the ones in our own families—can feel like an impossible add-on. Any additional form of reaching out yields mental images of more bricks and less straw. Rather than inhabiting the holidays, we’re somewhere else—spaced out and spread thin.
Whereas we might see mission as an add-on to the holidays, Jesus didn’t. For him, it was the main thing. While reaching out, serving, and thinking beyond ourselves can seem supplementary and extra to us, it was Jesus’s primary focus. Quite simply, his mission wasn’t a project; it was his people. And part of the mission involved . . . coming and hanging out with us. This is what we call “the incarnation.”
Isaiah prophesied this when he said Mary would nickname Jesus “Immanuel,” meaning “God with us” (Isa. 7:14). Stop for a minute and take that in: God wanted to be among us. He wanted to keep company with us. He wanted us to be together. John noticed it, too: “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us” (John 1:14 NIV).
As we think about Jesus as our Immanuel, we can learn from his ministry of presence. Since Jesus was both physically and emotionally present, we can be, too.
Jesus was physically present.
We are physical beings set in physical places with physical friends and families and physical particularities. Jesus was too. He wasn’t born into every family with every neighbor and every weird aunt. He was grounded in a precise place, surrounded by a certain set of people. Similarly, we aren’t called to be all things to all people. Instead, we’ve been purposefully placed to show the love of God to a handful of neighbors, including acquaintances, co-workers, those next door, and our kids.
As the holidays approach, we can remember that we are called to advance God’s mission as embodied people with eyes, ears, hands, and feet. Rather than tune out those around us, we can tune in. We can trust God to open our closed body posture and suggest concern rather than disinterest. Instead of tapping and scrolling our phones on the couch, we can rely on God’s strength to get up and cross a room to wash a dish or sit down on the floor to play with a child. We can use our hands to scrub, wrap, help, organize, donate, and feed. We can pray with the psalmist, “Establish the work of our hands for us—yes, establish the work of our hands” (Ps. 90:17 NIV).
Jesus was emotionally present.
At feasts and festivals, on walks, and in courtyards Jesus was physically grounded with two feet on the floor, but he was emotionally grounded, too. In contrast to our tendency to disassociate from people and our circumstances, Jesus stayed involved. He stayed interested. He identified with the people in front of him, looking for opportunities to show compassion.
As God’s people, do we image Jesus in this way or would we rather just check out? I need reminding that transformation happens in this kind of incarnational ministry, and I miss it when I’m scattered or scrolling. I want to notice when my neighbor is stressed and pay attention when my child is worried. I want to discern a co-worker’s loneliness or circle back with a question that shows I was listening. I want to take time to reflect on my day’s interactions with people and pray for these things. I want to engage in God’s mission by being emotionally present in my passing conversations, not as an add-on but as the main thing.
Over these next few weeks, we can remind ourselves—and our groups—that Jesus is our Immanuel, God with us. And as we spend time with others physically and emotionally throughout this Christmas season, let’s share the gift of Jesus’s ministry working in and through us: our holiday presence.
Elizabeth Mckinney is a wife and mom to four little girls. She is on staff with Cru City and serves as associate staff at her church, The Crossing in Columbia, Missouri. She writes, speaks and is passionate about helping people love their next-door neighbors. Elizabeth is the co-author of Placed for a Purpose and Neighborhoods Reimagined: How the Beatitudes Inspire Our Call to Be Good Neighbors (coming Spring 2024). You can find her on Instagram and on The Placed for a Purpose Podcast.