Hospitality When All Is Shut Down
I sorted through the fall candles at TJ Maxx, looking for pumpkin spice. Reluctantly, I smelled a few jars, although my mask blocked most of the scent. After touching a dozen or so candles, I reapplied hand-sanitizer and then went to the next shelf. I was searching for a candle to place on the porch of a family from church. We hadn’t seen them in months, but I hoped the candle would cheer them and remind them of our church community.
What a difference from last year, when I vacuumed our home for small group Bible study while a crockpot of apple cider warmed on the kitchen counter. But today, with people dashing into grocery stores, all masked up, community get-togethers seem unlikely. Even many small group Bible studies have gone virtual because of the pandemic. So, as a church, a local church specifically, how do we show hospitality this season?
Doing Hospitality During a Pandemic
What might some tangible examples of hospitality look like right now? And what can our budgets allow?
How about that bag of clothes in the car meant for dropping off at Goodwill? Are there individual things that can be divided-up and left on the doorsteps of people in our church family? Here’s an opportunity to see and think of one another (at a distance, if necessary).
Books, too, are something we can share. It seems easier to give things away during a pandemic when nothing feels certain. But if it’s not in my budget to order a take-out meal for a family in need, what about splitting the meal I'm making for my own family? Of course, I will be sure to wear a mask when I deliver it because that's another way to show hospitality and consideration for my neighbor's health.
Showing Hospitality for God’s Glory, Not My Own
But what if I leave a candle on my neighbor’s doorstep and they think, that’s weird, why did she do that? When a worry like this sidetracks me, I need to check my motive for showing hospitality. The focus should be caring about God’s kingdom, not what people think about me (Galatians 1:10).
This also propels me to seek God as I serve others. It most likely won't be random or hasty and probably considered prayerfully. But if an opportunity does arise and it's spontaneous, I can trust God’s leading and provision.
Should I text the person in my church family whose daughter has a big cross-country meet (complete with social-distancing and a rigorous trail)? I imagine she feels stressed, so I could offer to pray for her today. But what if it’s not necessary of my time and energy? Yet, there’s probably a reason this person is on my heart now, and not later. Since God gives us various spiritual gifts, and if encouraging others is mine, I can send that text now and do it for God's glory. When I think of things in terms of God's kingdom, I'm spurred on to show hospitality without hesitating or making excuses.
Including Those in My Church Who Might Find Community Elsewhere
In the absence of face-to-face church gatherings, people may fill their schedules with other things and hobbies. Online communities especially appeal to people in their loneliness, and they can be helpful, but our local church community is God’s design for us (1 Corinthians 12:27).
“Hey, want to Facetime right now?” The text showed up on my phone from a friend in the church. She and her husband, Dave, wanted to talk with my husband, Mark, and me. Even though circumstances prevented the social gathering from happening in-person, we had a renewed sense of community after the conversation. And throughout the pandemic, we've found creative ways to meet with these friends in outdoor settings. But not everyone feels comfortable leaving their home, so I keep this in mind as I ponder how I can show hospitality.
I think about those who might truly feel disconnected. Who can I check on and greet with a text message or a phone call? Who doesn't have the skills or the luxury of using technology like Zoom and social media to connect with others? Who could I invite to go for a walk with my kids and me this week in the pleasant fall weather before winter arrives?
Considering the Cross and What Jesus Means to Us, His Followers
Doubts spring up: Someone else would better serve this person. Not me, I haven’t been the most cheerful lately. Or, thoughts like, not that person, no way.
But it’s the cross of Jesus that gives us a reason to serve and keeps us humble. We are all deserving of punishment because of our sin. God showed his grace to us in Jesus, and so we, his followers, are all declared righteous in his sight. Ephesians 2:4-5 says, “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—” (ESV). And later in this passage, verse 10 says, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
Because of who we are in Christ, we make ourselves available to love and serve others with hospitality. We know the familiar words of Jesus in Matthew 22:39 about loving our neighbor, but what does this mean for us personally, and in 2020 during a pandemic? Chris and Elizabeth McKinney write in their newly published book, Placed for a Purpose, “His kingdom is meant to touch every aspect of our lives, including how we interact with our neighbors.” (page 4).
So maybe we offer to rake leaves or wash windows for an elderly person who lives on our street, or maybe we pick up a grocery item for them on our trip to the store. It could be a conversation in the driveway; after saying hello to the next-door neighbor, we usually only give a slight wave in passing. Maybe we start by talking about football. Lingering around to be available makes time for meaningful talks. After a few sentences, something like, “What gives you hope during these unusual times?” might seem appropriate. Or maybe a more straightforward question surfaces, such as, “What do you believe happens to someone after they die?” in response to a conversation about the COVID-19 death toll. People are desperate to share their opinions, and maybe God has placed us near our neighbors to listen and eventually share the gospel with them. Chris and Elizabeth McKinney talk about the gospel in relationship to our neighbors, “…the invitation into his kingdom is to be extended as we tell others about him...” (page 7), but they also write about how Jesus often incorporated indirect communication when talking with others. "Could a spiritual conversation include topics ranging from self-image, depression, race, career, and even gardening? What if those are some of the most significant, ground-breaking, seed-watering, soil-fertilizing, spiritual conversations you have?" (page 102).
As I remember that it's God who gives the growth in everyone's hearts (1 Corinthians 3:6-7), I know that just being there for others, plantings seeds, (even with a bothersome mask on, and even while having to stand six feet apart).
As we look for ways to show hospitality this season, it might feel challenging. It also may be uncomfortable, but we can trust God to accomplish his purposes as we love our neighbors and those in our church family.
Timarie Friesen lives in Iowa with her family and she serves with her husband in youth and missions ministries at Hope Church (EFCA) in Dubuque. She is a stay-at-home mom and enjoys reading books with her three children, and she is a member of the GCD Writers' Guild and loves connecting with other writers. You can read more about her writing on her website or on Twitter.
