Shadow Christians and the Care of Hurting Children
A pediatric hospital is a difficult place to visit. Seeing children in pain and the impact on people who love them is heart-rending. When cancer wrecks a tiny body, an infection can’t be controlled, or an accident requires reconstructive surgery—the situation is bleak and depressing. When children are in pain, our hearts go out to them. Their pain spreads to their parents and others who care for them in waves of turmoil compounded by feelings of helplessness. Our hearts go out to families and caregivers in these situations as well.
Perhaps you have been one of these children, or an adult who loved and cared for one. When our daughter Melody was a junior in high school, she experienced a year-long debilitating illness. She was a three-sport athlete, playing something year-round. One day, at the beginning of the school year, she came home from soccer practice not feeling well. She went to bed and did not get up for six weeks. It was four months before we had a diagnosis and started a treatment plan. She missed almost an entire year of school and, as a people-person, endured a lonely year of isolation during treatments and recovery.
It was a rough year for Melody and the people who loved her. She was fortunate. Her illness abated and she lives a normal life today. Some aren’t so fortunate. We have friends with a daughter who also became sick in high school. She still struggles, almost 30 years later, to manage day-to-day life. A once vibrant young woman, through no fault of her own, has lived with physical pain and emotional suffering for years. It’s been hard for her, her parents, and all of us who love her. When a child suffers, the trauma cascades over everyone touched by the situation.
JESUS AND THE LITTLE CHILDREN
Jesus encountered several families—names never recorded—who had a child in crisis. His tender concern for these anonymous families is another example of Jesus showing love by how he related to children. A boy was feverishly sick, too weak to travel to Jesus (Jn. 4:46-54). His father, a government official in Capernaum made a trip to Cana (about 24 miles), “and pleaded with him to come down and heal his son, since he was about to die” (Jn. 4:47). He implored Jesus, “Sir…come down before my boy dies” (Jn. 4:49). Jesus responded with simple instructions and a promise. He said, “Go…your son will live” (Jn. 4:50). The official started home, but was met on the way by some of his servants who told him his son was recovering. When he inquired about the time of the healing, the servants replied, “yesterday, at one in the afternoon the fever left him. The Father realized this was the very hour at which Jesus had told him, ‘Your son will live.’” As a result of this healing, “he himself believed, along with his whole household” (Jn. 4:52-53).
“Jesus tenderly loves people who don’t believe in him, who may come to him with mixed motives, but are desperate enough to seek his help. You don’t have to be a spiritual insider to experience God’s tender love.”
Jesus healed the son of this secular government official—not the favored son of one of his followers. Before the healing, he chided the father, “Unless you people see signs and wonders, you will not believe” (Jn. 4:48). Even though Jesus reproved his listeners for their confused motives, this burdened father wasn’t dissuaded. He still asked for and received the healing his son needed. As a result of seeing this sign and wonder, he committed to following Jesus. Jesus tenderly loves people who don’t believe in him, who may come to him with mixed motives, but are desperate enough to seek his help. You don’t have to be a spiritual insider to experience God’s tender love.
On another occasion, the situation was even worse. Another desperate father came to Jesus with a son who was having seizures because of demon possession (Mt. 17:14-20, Mk. 9:14-29, Lk. 9:37-43). Matthew recorded the father’s plea this way: “When they reached the crowd, a man approached and knelt down before him. ‘Lord,’ he said, ‘have mercy on my son, because he has seizures and suffers terribly. He often falls into the fire and often into the water’” (Mt. 17:14-15). Mark added additional gruesome details: “Teacher, I brought my son to you. He has a spirit that makes him unable to speak. Whenever it seizes him, it throws him down, and he foams at the mouth, grinds his teeth, and becomes rigid” (Mk. 9:17-18a). Luke adds another fact which makes the story even more poignant: the father lamented, “he’s my only child” (Lk. 9:38). What a tragic situation! As a result of demon-induced seizures, this boy was tossed into fires and streams, foamed at the mouth, ground his teeth, and became stiff as a board. He was his parents’ pride-and-joy, their only child, making their pain even more intense.
When this father asked for Jesus’ help, it almost sounded like an apology for bothering him. He told Jesus, “I brought him to your disciples, but they couldn’t heal him” (Mt. 17:16). He had tried to get the help his son needed without involving Jesus, to no avail. Jesus’ response is a stinging rebuke, which might seem to have included the father. But it was more likely directed to the disciples (for their lack of faith) and the crowds (for their spiritual shallowness). He said, “You unbelieving and perverse generation, how long will I be with you? How long must I put up with you?” (Mt. 17:17). As soon as Jesus learned of the situation, he “rebuked the demon, and it came out of him, and from that moment the boy was healed” (Mt. 17:18). Once again, Jesus showed compassion for a hurting child—after rebuking adults for their spiritual impotence. The contrast is startling—confrontation for bystanders but love extended to a hurting father and suffering child.
Not much is known about this father, his son, or the unmentioned mother. They are among the anonymous people Jesus encountered and cared for in remarkable ways. He intervened when his disciples were powerless to change the situation. Shadow Christians can depend on Jesus to love them even when others have given up on them.
One final situation was worse than either of these two sick children—a young man had died. Jesus was nearing a village called Nain when he encountered a funeral procession. The dead boy was the only son of his widowed mother. “When the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her and said, ‘Don’t weep.’ Then he came up and touched the open coffin, and the pallbearers stopped. And he said, ‘Young man, I tell you, get up!’ The dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother” (Lk. 7:13-15).
This heartbroken woman was doubly grieved. Her husband had passed away, and now her son had also died. In her culture, most women in this situation would have suffered both emotional loss and financial calamity. Without a man to provide, her situation would have been bleak. Jesus was moved with compassion by her plight and, without being asked, stepped in to meet both her emotional and practical needs. He soothed her grief and gave her back a provider. Jesus cared enough for this woman to meet her deepest needs, even without being asked.
Jesus cared for his woman as a virtual stranger. He had not yet arrived in town when he saw the funeral procession heading to the burial place. No one introduced this woman to him. She didn’t ask for his help. Jesus loves anonymous people preoccupied with their pain and moving through life without him. Jesus still reaches out to unnamed women and men who need his help.
SHADOW CHRISTIANS AND THE WAY OF JESUS
Shadow Christians experience bleak situations and bad days (as do Christian leaders). You hurt deeply because of profound loss. You wonder how you are going to make it through the pain of losing a loved one. You also experience lesser losses—getting fired from a job, a broken engagement, or strained family relationships. All of these circumstances are painful. When they happen, we hurt spiritually and emotionally. Jesus sees his followers in pain and responds, like he did for this woman, by providing emotional support and taking care of practical needs. He strides toward our pain, not slinks away from it. Jesus tenderly touches broken bodies, dying dreams, and fractured relationships with his restorative power.
Jeff Iorg is president of Gateway Seminary, a learning network with five campuses and a robust distance learning program. He speaks frequently on leadership and pastoral ministry issues in conferences and classroom settings. Iorg maintains a leadership website at www.jeffiorg.com, is featured on the Lead On! podcast, and has written or edited several other books. He and his wife, Ann, live in Ontario, California.
Excerpted with permission from Shadow Christians by Jeff Iorg. Copyright 2020, B&H Publishing Group.